Life After College: Lonely in Real Life

lonely grad

While living with my grandparents has its perks (unlimited prune juice), it also has its downside (the only available beverage is prune juice). And even though I’m in the biggest city in the world, I’ve never felt more alone. There’s nothing more depressing than coming home from work and seeing people your age having crazy amounts of fun together, and knowing the only thing that awaits you is hearing the latest CNN updates from your grandfather.

So when my friend said she was having a graduation party in Boston, I jumped at the chance to go. Too bad I didn’t jump fast enough and all the tickets on the good bus were sold out. I wasn’t going to miss a weekend with my friends, though, so despite reading reviews of late, overbooked, and nonexistent buses, I booked a seat on the discount line. Not only did the bus show up on time but it was also double decker! Which was good, because the thought of arriving to Boston unemployed and in a single decker bus was just beyond embarrassing.

My friends picked me up at the bus and we went straight out to the bars. I don’t know how I went from being able to drink for ten hours straight just a month ago to not being able to stay awake past midnight now, but it wasn’t pretty. I feel like I’m aging in dog years; every month out of college is seven months of adulthood. By the end of the summer I won’t be able to go to happy hour without putting in my dentures first.

But even though I was falling asleep at the bar and ordering alka-seltzer shots, I still felt better seeing my friends again. It reminded me that at one point I did used to have the ability to have fun. And fun we had. The beauty of no one having jobs is that no one had a reason not to come to the Boston reunion weekend. It almost felt like we were back at school, except for the part where the drinks were more than $2 and we had to tiptoe into a real house and close the door to go to the bathroom because real live adults lived there.

And the grad party itself was a blast. Well, to my stomach, at least. There was enough food there to keep me fed and nourished for the rest of my life and, seeing as everything in my grandparents’ kitchen is pureed, I thought I’d load up. Not that it was different from any other BBQ situation I’ve ever been in – I don’t know why but I feel the need to treat every BBQ as if it were my last supper.

It must have been all the food that made me forget that I can’t play beer pong. Four years of college and I’m still lobbing the ball ten feet from the closest cup. I can write that down on my list of reasons not to miss school. Not so much the losing, but the feelings of rejection when people choose to play with the family dog instead of me.

Anyways, before I knew it the weekend was over and I was on my way back to New York. There’s definitely a spring back in my step now. I know there is hope in the world. I know that I’m not alone. I know that even though I spend my nights explaining to my grandparents that law school will not help a writing career, somewhere out there, a double decker bus ride away, I actually do have friends.



  1. Heather says:

    I'll be your friend girl <3

  2. Britt says:

    I just moved to VA for a nanny job and I feel the same way. Although my friends are a flight away, not a bus ride. :(

  3. Ruby says:

    My friends have moved on, fast :P So I don't even have that luxury.

  4. Sarah says:

    I don't mean to be a one-upper, but at least you don't live alone in your apartment in a deserted college town that's at least one hour away from anyone remotely interesting (without a car) while working a 40-hour a week job just to pay the rent on said apartment so you can come home each night and eat Lean Cuisine and engage in conversation with the only other things in the room: some pet rats and a television screen.

  5. Trace says:

    I hear all you guys. It has been a year since I graduated; one of your lines described it best… It is nice to be able to remind myself I ACTUALLY DO HAVE FRIENDS they are just all states away.

  6. Lonely Man says:

    I'm in college and I'm lonely because I don't have friends who like me well enough to invite me to anything. I just want to have something to miss. I don't like being alone.

  7. meli says:

    All of my friends just graduated. All have gone to their respective states. I still have another year!!!

    I don't want to start over.


    University of Hawaii

  8. Claire says:

    I've been just going through the same thing. I'm working this summer int the city, only an hour away from home. I neither have no reason to go home on the weekends, nor a reason to stay. I stick around by myself though in hopes that I'll find someone..almost anyone to spend time with. I'm an easy-going, open-minded person who just loves hanging out with interesting people… Ihave a few friends here, but I feel that if I call them ALL the time (like once a week to hang out) I'll be considered a "clinger." I hope it'll work out better for me later on this summer..

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