As July creeps closer in my archaic paper day planner (no, I don’t have a Blackberry, okay!?), I am getting ever more excited for one glorious event: The Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. Nothing beats watching a ripped hottie (Japanese hottie, no less) scarfing dogs like he’s on death row. I, unfortunately, can only handle a maximum of three hot dogs (and that was on a bet…which I lost) and have no six pack.
Apparently, there is another awesome summer competition that I might actually have a chance at: the National Texting Championships. Tasks include texting while blindfolded (uh, sleep/drunk texting basically – done deal) and texting while maneuvering through a moving obstacle course (texting while walking – done deal). The most awesome part about this competition is the winner gets a free phone AND $50,000! If only I had known about this before!
I wonder how many other random contests there are out there…? Because I may not be the best at eating hot dogs or texting, but I am good at some things. I’m good at watching hours and hours of TV online without taking a break for basic human necessities (food? bah. bathroom? whatevs.) and combining weird things for meals (mashed potatoes and french toast for lunch, anyone?). I’m also quite good at Googling terms that provide the grossest of gross images (it’s a gift).
Now, all I have to do is wait for the day when someone decides to make a competition for these activites and reward me (a bedpan? Cookbook? Therapy?) for being so awesome.
[Photo courtesy of The Daily Mail]