Comments on: Sexy Time: Check Your “Type” At The Door http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/ Advice on student style, collegiate dating discussion guides, relationship advice and women's studies. Mon, 23 Nov 2009 03:17:08 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: By Lena Chen » Other » Asian American Awareness Week: Female Sexuality Panel http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-59478 By Lena Chen » Other » Asian American Awareness Week: Female Sexuality Panel Tue, 10 Nov 2009 04:56:48 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-59478 [...] place at 4:30pm in Lowell House’s Junior Common Room. It’s a topic to which I’ve devoted plenty of ink, so I welcome the opportunity to hold another audience hostage while I ramble away. [...] [...] place at 4:30pm in Lowell House’s Junior Common Room. It’s a topic to which I’ve devoted plenty of ink, so I welcome the opportunity to hold another audience hostage while I ramble away. [...]

]]> By: precum http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-51708 precum Wed, 02 Sep 2009 20:41:52 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-51708 i agreee with the article the majority trys to portray herself in her movies as the best thing arround (in american that is the white people) anyways there is an easy solution ot all this bullocks.....stop watching their movies throw your tv out of the window (dont do it if u live par-terre) i did it and those brainwashing media lies dont have much effect anymore i love all women the only type of women i ghate to be arround is low intelligence women also i hate racists (if they are aware of it or not) that being said dont watch tv dont go to the movies read some books instead not only will u get rid of stereotypes you also leanr in the process and dont waste your time to jerry springers racist program lol live long and in prosper i agreee with the article the majority trys to portray herself in her movies as the best thing arround
(in american that is the white people)

anyways there is an easy solution ot all this bullocks…..stop watching their movies
throw your tv out of the window (dont do it if u live par-terre)

i did it and those brainwashing media lies dont have much effect anymore
i love all women
the only type of women i ghate to be arround is low intelligence women
also i hate racists (if they are aware of it or not)

that being said

dont watch tv
dont go to the movies
read some books instead
not only will u get rid of stereotypes you also leanr in the process
and dont waste your time to jerry springers racist program lol

live long and in prosper

]]> By: skeptical_guy http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-51330 skeptical_guy Sun, 30 Aug 2009 22:27:51 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-51330 This article doesn't make much sense. I'm a a mutli-racial guy from America and I only date Asian women (from Asia, in Asia) because there are many Asian women that I find attractive, feel compatible with and we're more than willing to put up with the faults of the other. There are other reasons as well but I don't think you'd truly understand. I guess I have a 'fetish' for Asian women due to our Hollywood based society that places blond hair and blue eyes over everything else. I must be brainwashed. This article doesn’t make much sense. I’m a a mutli-racial guy from America and I only date Asian women (from Asia, in Asia) because there are many Asian women that I find attractive, feel compatible with and we’re more than willing to put up with the faults of the other. There are other reasons as well but I don’t think you’d truly understand. I guess I have a ‘fetish’ for Asian women due to our Hollywood based society that places blond hair and blue eyes over everything else. I must be brainwashed.

]]> By: Mark http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-50252 Mark Fri, 21 Aug 2009 08:59:09 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-50252 I'm an chinese male living in canada- a supposed multicultural country. though I am open to dating anybody, my personal preferences do lean towards other asians. this is in part to a few bad experiences in the past where I've been shot down by girls with explicit comments such as "...ya so i only date white guys.." the media is a big contributor to the portrayal of sterotypes. for example, asian males get screwed in tv movies etc. its a perpetual cycle because network and movie studios won't risk a project by casting an asian male in protagonist role for fear that audiences wont identify, and more importantly, find the actor/character attractive. audiences watch the programming and thus the cycle repeats. so the asian male actors usually get the coveted nerdy/effeminate/perverted/generic martial arts/comic relief roles: -vince masuka in dexter -lloyd in entourage -every teen comedy ever made (even harold n kumar before harold "grows a pair" at the climax of the movie, which only happened because harold is 1 of 2 protagonists in the movie...and the leading man always gets the girl..?) -the "chairman" in iron chef america (wow what a fucking sweet job...to mutter incomprehensible "asian language" phrases and to do flips n cartwheels, AND you get fed top notch food...) i am both a victim and a perpetrator of not "checking your type at the door". due to reasons aforementioned, i think the only ethnic group i probably won't readily consider as prospects are black girls. there was just this 'je ne sais quoi' feeling, until Lena Chen articulated the feeling by stating black females in American media are masculinized. its a shame, and alas it's very hard to undue stereotypes, prejudices, and sentiments. i've met interesting, intelligent, sexy black girls at school, but never could overcome the mental barrier to proceed to ask them out. to be judge against a normative set of standards suck shit, especially if youre on the wrong side of the bell curve. ive worked many years to erase my own perceptions to try to keep an open mind, and i dont know if we'll ever reach such an egalitarian dating paradigm, but i think Lena Chen is preaching that we should at least try. so please, in the future, if you see that cute guy/gal across the classroom stealing glances n smiling at you, smile back! you could have just met your soulmate. PS. where the hell are the moderators? we need to keep this shite positive. no more "holly" please. P.P.S. am i like the only guy who reads collegecandy? lol/sigh I’m an chinese male living in canada- a supposed multicultural country. though I am open to dating anybody, my personal preferences do lean towards other asians. this is in part to a few bad experiences in the past where I’ve been shot down by girls with explicit comments such as “…ya so i only date white guys..”

the media is a big contributor to the portrayal of sterotypes.
for example, asian males get screwed in tv movies etc. its a perpetual cycle because network and movie studios won’t risk a project by casting an asian male in protagonist role for fear that audiences wont identify, and more importantly, find the actor/character attractive. audiences watch the programming and thus the cycle repeats. so the asian male actors usually get the coveted nerdy/effeminate/perverted/generic martial arts/comic relief roles:

-vince masuka in dexter
-lloyd in entourage
-every teen comedy ever made (even harold n kumar before harold “grows a pair” at the climax of the movie, which only happened because harold is 1 of 2 protagonists in the movie…and the leading man always gets the girl..?)
-the “chairman” in iron chef america (wow what a fucking sweet job…to mutter incomprehensible “asian language” phrases and to do flips n cartwheels, AND you get fed top notch food…)

i am both a victim and a perpetrator of not “checking your type at the door”. due to reasons aforementioned, i think the only ethnic group i probably won’t readily consider as prospects are black girls.

there was just this ‘je ne sais quoi’ feeling, until Lena Chen articulated the feeling by stating black females in American media are masculinized. its a shame, and alas it’s very hard to undue stereotypes, prejudices, and sentiments. i’ve met interesting, intelligent, sexy black girls at school, but never could overcome the mental barrier to proceed to ask them out. to be judge against a normative set of standards suck shit, especially if youre on the wrong side of the bell curve. ive worked many years to erase my own perceptions to try to keep an open mind, and i dont know if we’ll ever reach such an egalitarian dating paradigm, but i think Lena Chen is preaching that we should at least try.

so please, in the future, if you see that cute guy/gal across the classroom stealing glances n smiling at you, smile back! you could have just met your soulmate.

PS. where the hell are the moderators? we need to keep this shite positive. no more “holly” please.

P.P.S. am i like the only guy who reads collegecandy? lol/sigh

]]> By: Donnette - Manhattanville College http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-42162 Donnette - Manhattanville College Mon, 13 Jul 2009 07:05:59 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-42162 Ashley- you don't seem to have a problem with self esteem but you really shouldn't compare yourself in that way. I'm sure you're not "the ugly chick". I'm also curious about the "European standards of beauty". I'm pretty sure you can be found attractive within changing your image. I'm black and I haven't had any trouble with receiving attention or invitations from guys (of any races. I also have a slight preference to dating outside my race but I don't call it a type. Type is the extra stuff: tall, musician, athletic... btw Holly's "get used to it Shaniqua" comment is bothering me Ashley- you don’t seem to have a problem with self esteem but you really shouldn’t compare yourself in that way. I’m sure you’re not “the ugly chick”. I’m also curious about the “European standards of beauty”. I’m pretty sure you can be found attractive within changing your image.

I’m black and I haven’t had any trouble with receiving attention or invitations from guys (of any races. I also have a slight preference to dating outside my race but I don’t call it a type. Type is the extra stuff: tall, musician, athletic…

btw Holly’s “get used to it Shaniqua” comment is bothering me

]]> By: Katie http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-41716 Katie Sun, 12 Jul 2009 03:13:38 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-41716 Steph hit the nail on the head for me, and the [parts] are my own. "I’m [white as white gets] and am only attracted to [black] guys 99% of the time. I’m sorry, I just don’t find [Hispanic/Asian/middle eastern men] attractive. I do not think to myself “Don’t like him, he’s ___ race.” Instead, I just look and think, “Attractive” or “Not attractive”. I’ve gotten plenty of slack from my mother and the occasional friend or acquittance over how strict my taste is when it comes to race, but I don’t know. At the end of the day, I am the one who will be with him, so shouldn’t I be attracted to him?" Living in West Texas, I've come to find out that if I do find a white guy that I'm interested in, they aren't interested in me once they find out that I have no problem dating black men. What's up with that? Steph hit the nail on the head for me, and the [parts] are my own.

“I’m [white as white gets] and am only attracted to [black] guys 99% of the time. I’m sorry, I just don’t find [Hispanic/Asian/middle eastern men] attractive. I do not think to myself “Don’t like him, he’s ___ race.” Instead, I just look and think, “Attractive” or “Not attractive”. I’ve gotten plenty of slack from my mother and the occasional friend or acquittance over how strict my taste is when it comes to race, but I don’t know. At the end of the day, I am the one who will be with him, so shouldn’t I be attracted to him?”

Living in West Texas, I’ve come to find out that if I do find a white guy that I’m interested in, they aren’t interested in me once they find out that I have no problem dating black men.

What’s up with that?

]]> By: EA http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-40557 EA Thu, 09 Jul 2009 09:02:46 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-40557 Woah woah woah. This is getting heated! Honestly I have to say I agree with this article. I have dated/hooked-up with many different ethnicities and found the spice of variety to be very refreshing! Each person, regardless of race, brought something new and exciting into my life. Because of the vastly different attitudes and body types, I have had the opportunity to enjoy dating and sex more than I ever could have in my race category alone. I'm not so sure I believe we are biologically programmed to be attracted solely to our own race either; I seem to be more attracted to other races. Perhaps the upbringings of some alter the psyc. to think it is only attracted to certain types? From my experience I would heavily reccomend open-mindedness. Woah woah woah. This is getting heated!

Honestly I have to say I agree with this article. I have dated/hooked-up with many different ethnicities and found the spice of variety to be very refreshing! Each person, regardless of race, brought something new and exciting into my life. Because of the vastly different attitudes and body types, I have had the opportunity to enjoy dating and sex more than I ever could have in my race category alone.

I’m not so sure I believe we are biologically programmed to be attracted solely to our own race either; I seem to be more attracted to other races. Perhaps the upbringings of some alter the psyc. to think it is only attracted to certain types? From my experience I would heavily reccomend open-mindedness.

]]> By: Alex K. http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-40397 Alex K. Wed, 08 Jul 2009 23:25:35 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-40397 This article is maddeningly inane. It completely ignores the biological component of attraction. Individuals will naturally be attracted to those with traits that resemble their own, since it is evolutionary dominant to do so-- these genes would perpetuate themselves. I also find it presumptuous that the author, in her comments, would aver that "our physical preferences are WAY more socialized than they are genetic" as if this claim were self-evident. Also, I'm not sure how invoking the study comparing whites' dating preferences for minorities and vice-versa aides the authors argument, but, in any case, the result of this study should be totally moot-- it should be obvious that more minorities would be more likely to include whites in their dating preferences than vice-versa because there are more white people! Because of their majority, whites are more likely to be satisfied with their intraracial dating options than minorites, whose "pick of the litter" may be smaller within a minority group, especially since one must have an account with Yahoo! Personals in the first place to be available for consideration. This article is maddeningly inane. It completely ignores the biological component of attraction. Individuals will naturally be attracted to those with traits that resemble their own, since it is evolutionary dominant to do so– these genes would perpetuate themselves. I also find it presumptuous that the author, in her comments, would aver that “our physical preferences are WAY more socialized than they are genetic” as if this claim were self-evident.

Also, I’m not sure how invoking the study comparing whites’ dating preferences for minorities and vice-versa aides the authors argument, but, in any case, the result of this study should be totally moot– it should be obvious that more minorities would be more likely to include whites in their dating preferences than vice-versa because there are more white people! Because of their majority, whites are more likely to be satisfied with their intraracial dating options than minorites, whose “pick of the litter” may be smaller within a minority group, especially since one must have an account with Yahoo! Personals in the first place to be available for consideration.

]]> By: Salome http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-40375 Salome Wed, 08 Jul 2009 22:10:52 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-40375 Ha, I always get crap from others because I'm rather particular in the personality department (for example, I couldn't date someone whose politics are too different from my own, and I'm a classical composer so musical taste and knowledge is bigger deal with me compared to most people) but I'm pretty open-minded when it comes to looks, and I've been attracted to guys of pretty much every skin color, hair color, etc. But I've always thought my priorities were more in order than my friends'. Thanks for this! I feel less alone now. I too think that people who have racial "types" should think about what that really means - what kind of societal expectations have been ground into a preference for a certain race, and whether that's mired in racism. I'm still waiting for the guy who thinks Asian girls are all submissive and domestic to try to hit on my best friend...and watch his shock as he tries to dodge the resulting snark and sucker-punches. Ha, I always get crap from others because I’m rather particular in the personality department (for example, I couldn’t date someone whose politics are too different from my own, and I’m a classical composer so musical taste and knowledge is bigger deal with me compared to most people) but I’m pretty open-minded when it comes to looks, and I’ve been attracted to guys of pretty much every skin color, hair color, etc. But I’ve always thought my priorities were more in order than my friends’. Thanks for this! I feel less alone now.

I too think that people who have racial “types” should think about what that really means – what kind of societal expectations have been ground into a preference for a certain race, and whether that’s mired in racism. I’m still waiting for the guy who thinks Asian girls are all submissive and domestic to try to hit on my best friend…and watch his shock as he tries to dodge the resulting snark and sucker-punches.

]]> By: Katt http://collegecandy.com/2009/07/02/sexy-time-check-your-type-at-the-door/#comment-39484 Katt Mon, 06 Jul 2009 13:05:19 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=33915#comment-39484 Personally, when it comes to physical or sexual attraction...even though it usually goes hand-in-hand with an emotional attraction for me, however, I AM only human :P...I can be and have been attracted to varying "types." Besides, I have always thought that setting your dating mind frame to look for a specific type of person, is just detrimental to yourself in the long run. Because...what if you're just looking in the wrong spot forever? Personally, when it comes to physical or sexual attraction…even though it usually goes hand-in-hand with an emotional attraction for me, however, I AM only human :P …I can be and have been attracted to varying “types.”

Besides, I have always thought that setting your dating mind frame to look for a specific type of person, is just detrimental to yourself in the long run. Because…what if you’re just looking in the wrong spot forever?

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