Your 4th of July Survival Guide

The Fourth of July is a holiday deeply rooted in its traditions. You hang out with friends and family (sometimes in costume…), you cook big slabs of meat on the grill, you wash those slabs of meat down with an icy cold (alcoholic) beverage, and you sit on a blanket in the middle of a street to watch pretty bombs explode overhead.

Ooooo!
Ahhhhh!

But no matter how many times you do it, as you walk back to your car – scratching those damn mosquito bites until you bleed- you always find yourself wishing you had prepared for the festivities a little better.

So, this year, CollegeCandy is gonna help you out. We’ve done all the preparing so you don’t have to. Print this sucker out before you go and you will be ready for your 4th of July celebration (and possibly another Y2K situation…what can we say? We like to be prepared).  

Bug Spray: Those bitches won’t have a chance in hell

An extra cushy blanket: Sure, that table cloth is bigger, but is that going to protect your back from the giant rocks that always seem to end up under your back?

A long sleeved shirt: Yes, it is 80 degrees now, but you may want it later. However, if you don’t bring it you could always find a hottie to snuggle up with….

Beverages: Filled with alcohol. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but fireworks are boring. Fireworks with a little booze in your system, however, are totally freaking AWESOME.

Snacks: To keep the annoying nearby children quiet…and because those beverages may make you crave a Lunchables.

A Romantic Partner: I am sure this isn’t as easy as grabbing a bottle of bug spray, but if you have one, bring ‘em along. Fireworks are always better watched while snuggling (and, see above, drinking).

Camera: Obviously, a holiday is a total Kodak moment. But, even more, there are sure to be some fantastic mullets milling around. There always are. Always.

Aspirin: In case you run out of snacks and the damn kids on the next blanket won’t. shut. up.

Condoms: Because fireworks are romantic. And you’ll have to thank that dude keeping you warm somehow.

Alka Seltzer: The 3 hot dogs you scarfed at dinner are bound to make a comeback at some point.

A DD: Drinking and driving is never a good idea.