Let’s Put An End To These Fashion Faux Pas!

July 30, 2009 4:00 pm     Posted in Fashion, Style  Katie - Michigan State University g+ page

exposed thong intro

So. Tempted. To. Give. Wedgie.

By now, we’re all familiar with the fashion atrocities committed by the male population.  No, sweaty dude, that mesh tank top does not look good on you.  Or anyone, really.  But women are not free from errors – actually, considering our traditional involvement with fashion, we make rather more mistakes.


By Katie

In fact, that is the entire reason I read People magazine – the photo spreads that come out after major awards shows are priceless.  I mean, these celebrities have stylists!  How can these awful things happen??

Luckily, when I make a fashion faux pas, it usually goes undocumented.  However, it doesn’t always go unnoticed (thank goodness for my friends…the ones who truly care about me will tell me if I’m looking like a blind hooker as I’m walking out the door).  In the spirit of keeping our fellow ladies informed and aware (or end the unprovoked assault on our eyes as we walk down the street), we’ve made a list of the top five fashion faux pas’.

If you or any of your friends have done/are doing any of these…just stop.  Seek help.

Exposed Thong

thong showing

We get it. You're wearing a thong.

At no point during daily life should anyone’s thong be on show, unless you’re working the pole.  In which case, that’s probably the only thing you’re wearing and you’re exempt from this one.  For the rest of us, thongs (and other undergarments) should remain safely tucked in to your clothing.  If you wanna advertise the goods, leave the wrapping out of it.

Quadraboob

quadriboob

No, four boobs are not better than two.

No matter what guys say, two boobs are enough for any girl.  That’s perhaps why quadraboob (when your bra cup is too small and your breasts literally runneth over) is so offensive.  Some seem to think that quadraboob is sexy, implying that your boobs are huge and you’re just a big pile of sex.  We (and humanity) disagree.  It’s just so…bumpy.  And it doesn’t help that quadraboob usually comes coupled with back fat.

No Bra

no bra

No one needs to know if your boobs hang low. Or how low, for that matter.

Even more disturbing than quadraboob is the no bra faux pas (rhyming things make terrible things seem better).  The bouncing, the swinging, the nipples…oh, the nipples.  Boobs just need support!  They need to be shaped!  Your shirt was not made for your boobs, it was made for your bra!  The bra really does make the woman and no bra makes a saggy-boobed hippie.

Muffin Top

muffin top1

I don't know about you, but I prefer my muffin tops with chocolate chips and coarse sugar.

We all know it.  We all hate it.  Yet why do we continue to see the muffin top invading our schools and storming our streets??  There are a million different stores to shop at, which means everyone has the option of finding a pair of pants/a skirt that will fit them.  Sure, you might have nice legs that are proportionally more lean than the rest of your body.  Show them off in a mini dress, sister!  Just don’t buy a pair of pants to showcase your gams and leave the rest of your body to hang over the edge.

Denim on Denim

denim tuxedo

Yes, jeans go with everything. Just not jeans.

Nothin’ says class like a denim tuxedo.  Let’s break it down:  Jeans are fantastic and probably the best fashion innovation ever.  Denim shirts are hideous, period.  Denim jackets, harmless though they may seem, are the hardest things to pull off.  You can’t wear them with jeans, even if the denim is a different color (it’s still denim).  You can’t wear them with a skirt, otherwise you risk looking like you’re in junior high in the midwest (I live there, so I’m allowed to say that).  Best to avoid any combination of denim whatsover and stick with jeans. On your legs. End of story.

24 Comments on "Let’s Put An End To These Fashion Faux Pas!"

  1. Emily says:
    Thu, 30th Jul 200912:54 pm 

    carrie bradshaw invented the no-bra

  2. CHICKDOWNTOWN.COM Ch says:
    Thu, 30th Jul 20093:07 pm 

    Some just need a nudge in the right direction. Maybe they'll start to get it now. I know I've probably committed my share of errors, how about yall?

  3. Alisha says:
    Thu, 30th Jul 20095:26 pm 

    Glamour magazine just this month showed that denim on denim can in fact be done, and that denim shirts are going to be big for fall.

    I don't personaly base what I wear on fashion magazines and such, I just found it interesting that I had just read that, and now am reading this.

    No wonder some young ladies are so clueless about style. If it doesnt come naturally to them-which to some, it just doesnt- then it's pretty tough to learn.

  4. Bridgette says:
    Thu, 30th Jul 20097:13 pm 

    Snaps on the junior high in the midwest with the jean jacket and skirt, I so did that back in middle school.

  5. pryce says:
    Thu, 30th Jul 20097:54 pm 

    I'm kind of loving the resurgence of the denim jacket. It looks really cute with a dress…I think.

  6. Steph says:
    Fri, 31st Jul 20094:57 am 

    I have a natural muffin top and it happens regardless of how tight or loose my pants are. It's frustrating.

  7. steph says:
    Fri, 31st Jul 20098:00 am 

    as bad as it is, exposed thong can be entirely accidental (and embarassing once discovered)

  8. chloe says:
    Fri, 31st Jul 20098:51 am 

    Carrie Bradshaw also invented the black bra and see through top.

  9. Erin says:
    Fri, 31st Jul 20099:45 am 

    Carrie BRadshaw did not invent the no-bra, women in the 60's and 70's invented it, she brought the trend back. When people say that so and so invented something you don't sound too bright.

  10. chloe says:
    Fri, 31st Jul 20098:10 pm 

    Well then technically cavewomen invented the no-bra and women in the 60s and 70s invented it.

  11. chloe says:
    Fri, 31st Jul 20098:11 pm 

    *Women in the 60s and 70s brought it back

  12. Emily says:
    Sun, 2nd Aug 20095:39 pm 

    Forgetting your pants should really be on that list. It seems to be a big fashion trend right now but it's kind of skanky.

  13. Kaitlyn says:
    Mon, 3rd Aug 20091:24 pm 

    My fashion pet peeves:

    -Bra straps showing. Have some class, ladies. Either wear a top that covers the straps or buy a strapless bra (or corset like I have. ^.^ Yay for having a friend that makes period Edwardian corsets with steel boning. My waist and breast go no where. )

    -Wear your size for goodness sake! Girls who are bit large either in breasts or all-around, please to not wear tiny skimpy outfits, they're not at all flattering and make you either look bigger or like a H-O on the go. That doesn't mean wear baggy clothing either, though. As a slightly bigger woman, I love to wear clothes that are slightly form fitting and flatter my curves rather than flaunt them or hide them. And tiny slender ladies? Don't walk around in baggy clothing 5 sizes too big for you! In short, ladies, wear something that fits and is flattering, not either of the two extremes.

    -Socks with sandals. End. Of. Story.

    -Say it with me…Crocs. Ewwww. They're great for the community shower, but to wear to class or, as my roommate did once *cringe* wear them on a date.

    -The Maxi dress. I. HATE. THESE. THINGS. They are gigantic and roomy and keep you cool, of course, but they do NOTHING for a person's figure! They hide what you have and make you appear bigger than you are. 'Nuff said.

  14. shadowd says:
    Thu, 6th Aug 20099:29 am 

    Wow, let us hear it for women unity. Why would you call another woman a skank even if her thong is showing, or her bra strap? Why would it bother you?

    Ladies wear what you want to wear, if you are feeling freaky fly that thong full mast, who cares, as long as you are comfortable with it. Do you ever hear men going to other men, “Dude, you not planning on wearing that?” Of course not, men look at their friends as friends, regardless what they wear. The guy could just roll out of bed, and his friend would shrug his shoulders and say lets go, they do not care and they do not judge, because they are his friends and only care if his friend has his back. Why should it be different for us?

    Women have a tendency to judge other women harshly, the question is why?

    So instead of you telling all women what you think is skanky or classy, how about you start looking a bit deeper, and give us real advice, for example How to help a friend who is in an abusive relationship, and please, not the happy little booklet they hand out, but the real stuff, because let us be honest, men walk through restraining orders as if they mean nothing, the police barely help, we as women need some real advice on what to do.

  15. Alicia says:
    Fri, 11th Dec 200910:16 am 

    As steph said, an exposed thong isn't always intentional. And yes, when it does show accidentally, it is embarrassing.

  16. rob says:
    Thu, 11th Feb 20102:53 pm 

    personally, I think the no-bra look is sexy. I give high marks to the woman who makes it her around-the-house look at my place.

    young, old, big, little…doesn't matter. gorgeous.

  17. Stanley says:
    Mon, 23rd Jul 20122:11 pm 

    I love the efforts you have put in this, regards for all that the great posts .

    My weblog: reverse phone

  18. Mickey Logan says:
    Wed, 6th Feb 20133:03 am 

    the low-hangers and quads are magnificent.

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