Life After College: I’m Too Young For This

August 11, 2009     Posted in Internships, Reality

baby cap and gown

"I'm 22, dammit!"

I look very young for my age. If scientists took a lunch break from developing anti-aging creams and instead studied my delayed aging process they could figure out how to make everyone look eleven years younger (I had to one-up the TLC show).


By Jenni

When I tell people I just graduated from school they automatically assume middle school and tell me that I’ll  grow out of my awkward teen years soon. And when they find out that I’m actually 22 they reassure me that once I’m older I’ll appreciate looking younger. Like, great, when I’m 78 I’ll look 75. I’ll really impress all the men then; they’ll be wetting their Depends just to get with a young broad like me.

Throughout this whole summer I’ve tried to casually walk into bars only to be stopped by massive bouncers looking for an ID. They stare at them for hours trying to figure out how I got such a good fake and if I had to sneak out of my house to be there. They always reluctantly hand it back to me as if it ruined their night that I’m actually of age. By the time the bouncers are done scanning my ID for all possible forgeries, my friends are six pitchers deep and I’m shamed into actually feeling like I used a fake.

It’s like some sick joke that I’m technically too old to go back to college yet I don’t look old enough to be out without parental supervision.

When people actually do guess my correct age range (I accept 17-22) I blush and swoon. No other compliment gets me as heated as someone telling me I look my age. It’s the secret to my heart and I will spend the rest of the night feeling insanely mature. I give out free advice left and right because when I look older, I feel wiser. And everyone appreciates advice from the old and wise.

Anyways, since my internship is wrapping up shortly and no one has gotten around to fixing the economy yet, I’m about to have a lot of time on my hands. Time that I will fill with happy hours (or getting carded/double carded/strip searched attempting to get into the happy hours) and researching an alternative plastic surgery method that would give me the opposite effects of a face lift.

Real life is….awesome. (Note: that was sarcasm.)

15 Comments on "Life After College: I’m Too Young For This"

  1. J says:
    Tue, 11th Aug 200910:37 am 

    Wow, I am right there with you. I am 23 going on 24, and last week I got mistaken as my little sister's little sister. She's 20. They thought I was 16!(I swear I do not look THAT young). It's annoying, and hard. I feel like I am going to have a much more difficult time finding a real job, because no one believes someone as young looking as me can actually work. Ugh.

  2. T says:
    Tue, 11th Aug 200912:53 pm 

    THIS is the story of my life! Im almost 21 and people think im 15. And no…i wont be thankful when I'm older that I look younger…i wish ppl would stop saying that!

  3. Brittany says:
    Tue, 11th Aug 20091:32 pm 

    This is a problem of mine that has never gone away, and I'm almost 26! I got asked for my ID once for an R-rated movie. I said, "If I was under 17 don't you think I'd be in school right now?"

  4. Jen says:
    Tue, 11th Aug 20091:40 pm 

    This is the story of my life. I get hit on my kids in middle school and I'm 22. I've had all sorts of people tell me I look like I'm 12. 12 really? I can't even be a teenager at least? And it really creeps me out when old men hit on me then, does that mean they like me because I look young or they actually find me attractive?

  5. Sara C - Fordham says:
    Tue, 11th Aug 20093:03 pm 

    I feel your pain. I'm 21 and it still hurts when I stand next to my college-freshman sister and the stranger in question says, "So where are you going to apply to college?"

    However, I try to focus on the I'll-look-young-when-I'm-45 outlook, especially because it will probably happen much sooner than that. Think of how many people are obsessed with tanning!

  6. B says:
    Tue, 11th Aug 20094:50 pm 

    it bugs me to no end… i work at a bank- and every time I give someone an answer, they go looking to the financial specialist because I look so young… even if they give the same answer, the customer still accepts it from her, but not me…

  7. Sam says:
    Tue, 11th Aug 20096:43 pm 

    Oh my god!!! Are you girls really complaining about looking young? Take it from a guy's perspective… looking young is MUCH BETTER than actually looking your age. Or, conversely, looking older than your age. I have seen girls in their mid twenties look damn near 40 years old because of the sun damage from their youth already starting to show. Guys universally will choose to date a young looking woman over an older one. You should be thankful that you look young.

  8. Amy says:
    Wed, 12th Aug 20094:09 pm 

    Sam, looking so young that a man would have to be a perv to be interested in you is NOT a good thing!

    When I was 14 people thought I'd already graduated high school, now that I'm 20 people think I'm still in high school…I don't get it.

  9. Sam says:
    Wed, 12th Aug 20097:17 pm 

    HS seniors are 18. That is a GOOD THING!!!! I am telling you, enjoy your good fortune. When you are older and have crows feet, wrinkles, and leathery skin, you won't believe you actually thought it was a bad thing to look young. Since when did guys prefer older looking girls? There are some guys who won't even date a girl past her 20s. I have never heard of a guy who would never date a girl in her 20s if given the chance.

  10. Brit says:
    Thu, 13th Aug 200912:11 pm 

    Well Sam not everyone that replied said they are told they look 18. I understand your point; I would rather look a little younger than much older and I can see why guys would also like that. However, many of us were saying how we get told we look like we're under 18 when we are not, which is awkward when meeting new guys. I don't want to meet a guy that is only interested in me because I look 13, it's just creepy.

  11. Shar says:
    Sat, 15th Aug 20096:04 pm 

    With your youthful looks, you'll be able to disarm them all. They won't know how all that intelligence, humor and wit came from such a youngster!

  12. kirsten says:
    Tue, 18th Aug 20095:41 pm 

    i know how you feel. I just turned 20 and I look like a 14 year old. I remember a few days ago I went to an agency (Nursing agency – I'm studying nursing) to apply for an AIN job and the man that I was talking said to me "What kind of nurse are you?". He looked at me as if was joking or like I was playing a prank.

  13. Alan Swann says:
    Wed, 19th Aug 20096:53 am 

    Put things in perspective on how you're "too young for this"

    http://ImTooYoungForThis.org

  14. Fighting! says:
    Sat, 19th Dec 200911:05 am 

    I lol'd.

    This article is amazing. It is E X A C T L Y how I feel right now.

  15. candice says:
    Wed, 6th Jan 201011:13 am 

    im 20 and people think im 17,my boyfriend just turned 27 and his friends are older then him and even tho i am years more mature then any of them they cant take me seriously cuz they think i dont know anything about life cuz i cant get into a bar yet

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