Comments on: Ask A Dude: Am I Only A Friend With Benefits? http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/ Advice on student style, collegiate dating discussion guides, relationship advice and women's studies. Sat, 26 May 2012 08:31:47 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.com/ By: candice galvan http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-173545 Tue, 24 Apr 2012 19:22:58 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-173545 just curious. I have been with this guy for a little over a month now . In the beginning we had fun and sex. Now nothing. I have tried to talk to him about it but he just gets mad. I just need to know whats going on?

]]> By: soconfusedsocal http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-164173 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 02:36:27 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-164173 . Im 100% lost! The other day he brought me 3 yellow roses with a little stuffed monkey and texted me asking if I was at work or if I was still at home running late. (I work for his dad), and he was just curious b/c he got me a little something. We always have a good time together, he's there when I cry, he calls me when he cries and it's just a mess if you ask me. We do go out on the occasion but we like to stay at his parents house and watch lame movies and pass out cuddling. From my experience FWB don't cuddle after sex, kiss, etc. Someone PLEASE explain. Am I really wasting my time with him when I could be goin on dates????

]]> By: soconfusedsocal http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-164172 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 02:35:54 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-164172 So here's a good question… My neighbor and I are always together when he's not working. What I don't understand is when I try to make plans togo out with my friends to go have a drink at a bar or even if I go out alone he calls and complains because Im going out, and he tells me I am retarded for even going out and not hanging out with him. We do have a FWB thing going on. Sober or Drunk doesn't matter to either of us. He's very attentive he always texts when he's outta town for work and he admits he misses me but then on a random night where HE is drunk he says "you know we are just buddies right", then kisses me or hugs me

]]> By: APRIL http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-159336 Sat, 21 Jan 2012 00:49:39 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-159336 TO:LOST IN IT ALL ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….HE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS WITH BENIFITS AND I THINK YOU SHOULD TELL HIM YOUR NOT LIKE THAT BECAUSE IF YOU DONT THEN HE MITEE THINK THE WRONG THING ABOUT YOU AND YOU MITE BE GETTING INTO SOMETHING WITH HIM AND IT MITE BE MORE THEN A KISS……..SO JUST TELL HIM WHAT YOU FEEL ABOUT WHAT HAPPEND BETWEEN YOU TOO ………..JUST DON'T BE AFRADE TO TELL HIM BECAUSE TALKING TO THE MAIN GUY IS BETTER THEN TALKING TO OTHER PEOPLE ABOUT HIM BECAUSE YOU DON'T NEED TO LET US KNOW HOW YOU FEEL YOU NEED TO LET HIM……FROM APRIL

]]> By: Amber http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-158181 Fri, 13 Jan 2012 21:07:49 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-158181 I have been seeing this guy for 2 1/2 years, I've never met his family or friends. All we ever do is have sex he has never taken me out and we rarely speak on the phone a we text occasionally. Lately he has been showing more interest in me and telling me how much he likes me a lot, calling me babe, sexy, saying that I was his baby. He has been texting and calling more frequently, I like him a lot but I am afraid to ask him for more because i'm afraid of being rejected.

]]> By: Dazed and Confused http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-93039 Wed, 18 Aug 2010 12:22:43 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-93039 I am actually going through a situation very similar to BFWB. I have been best friends with this guy for about nine months now and we have been off and on FWB the entire time. He is terrified of relationships and everytime that we get close he begins to push me away. I feel like I cant ever talk to him about my true feelings for him because it would ruin our friendship. I dont know if I should tell him that I am in love with him or short change myself and leave things the way that they are? I just don't know how long I can keep this up, but it is just like The Dude said he is a creature of habit and he is probably not evening thinking about me having feelings for him. If anyone has any advice please let me know.

]]> By: lost in it all http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-67065 Thu, 04 Feb 2010 16:40:22 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-67065 this guy that i have liked since freshman year came over to my house the other day to talk. i had just got out of a relationship and i thought that i could talk to him about it all. well in the middle of talking he said he wanted to watch a movie. i thought it was no big deal so we put a movie on and he told me to get closer. that he wanted to cuddle. i layed closer to him knowing nothing would happen since he is a virgin and i have a purity ring that he knows i am proud of. then after awhile of cuddling and talking he kissed me. after we kissed i looked at him and asked did you mean to do that. he said that he has liked me since he first saw me and that since he was moving off to college he didnt want to get into anything that he would have to break off. but if that was the case why does he kiss me and say he likes me… im so confused. he always wants to come over but ever since i started asking him about his feelings he doesnt talk much or tries to get out of answering the questions. please help.

]]> By: Not a Clue http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-58644 Fri, 30 Oct 2009 09:45:20 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-58644 I'm 35 female and he's 33 single male… Not sure what this guy wants from me… when we first met we were flirting, a little kissing and touching… I'm involved in a relationship so I backed off… anyway, off and on we are still friends – I consider him a very dear friend and enjoy hanging out with me… We have been "friends" for a year, he has had me meet his brother when he was in town, he seems like he wants to hang out with me, involves me in his plans, etc… well recently I received several phone calls and emails from a girlfriend he has had and I had no idea. We have only been friends so I don't understand why he never told me about her… was he perhaps interested? Anyway, after a couple of weeks we are friends again and he wants to hang out with me again… I am confused of what he wants from me? Am I the girl who he wants around to massage his ego – pump him up? … A guy's response would be nice!

]]> By: Campus Diva http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-56615 Thu, 08 Oct 2009 13:24:45 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-56615 You definitely won't be JUST a friend with benefits if you check out how to make the perfect sex video…
http://www.precioustimeny.com/blog/?p=5152

]]> By: Tom http://collegecandy.com/2009/09/30/ask-a-dude-am-i-only-a-friend-with-benefits/#comment-56159 Sat, 03 Oct 2009 11:55:19 +0000 http://collegecandy.com/?p=42313#comment-56159 BFWB,

Talk to him, but don't just ask him what he wants, because he might be too afraid to admit that he REALLY likes you now (or has been in love w/you for some time.) Why? Because nothing scares a guy more than admitting to feelings for a girl (or another guy, I suppose ;-) ) and finding out that the other person doesn't love him back.

Just tell him that you love him (in the "as a person" voice, but don't use the words) _and_ the sex, and that you want to be his (platonic) friend or his girlfriend, because the FWB sex is hurting both your friendship and the potential for a BF-GF-relationship.

It's really a no-lose situation, if you think about it. You either get a BF or you get your old friend back.

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