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Bad News for Band Geeks
September 30, 2009 Posted in Buzz
Well, this kid's screwed.
Sixth grade was a rough year for me. I was sitting at the semi-popular table at lunch and was delusional enough to think I was the cat’s pajamas. Looking back, I simply was not. Maybe because I used phrases like “the cat’s pajamas.” And now, a Swedish study is telling me that my unpopularity will cause me to suffer from heart disease and diabetes later in life and I will most likely start doing drugs and try to kill myself.
If I had known this when I was 13, I would have combed my hair on a more regular basis.
The study, which is most definitely making me want to eat enough candy to put me in a diabetic coma/do drugs/crawl into my bed and cry, was done by Stockholm University and the Karolinska Institute and assessed children in sixth grade for their degree of “popularity, power and social status.”
Now, I have to ask: What kind of power were they expecting from a 13-year-old child? His ability to convince a girl in his class to go 7 Minutes in Heaven with him?
Popularity is such a trivial theory. And no, I’m not just saying this because I’m bitter that I’m at greater risk for alcohol dependency than others. Popularity in middle school ran parallel to who had the best desserts in his or her Power Rangers/My Little Pony lunchbox. By eighth grade, you were considered a cool girl if you had boobs and a cool guy if you were allowed to touch them. If you made it to second base, you were destined to be popular in high school. And if you went to an all-girls high school like I did, well no one was popular in that case.
I got to college and finally came to terms with my own social status, wherever I happened to fall on the social food chain. But now I’m learning that I can never truly leave my unpopularity in the past, as it will have a long-term impact on my identity, behavior and ambitions.
Currently, I feel pretty good about myself. No sign of diabetes and no one has had to talk me off the ledge just yet, but who knows. Perhaps the time I split my pants during a talent show performance and my entire middle school laughed me off the stage will be the cause of my ultimate demise 20 years from now.
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Jess says:
Wed, 30th Sep 200911:19 am
Aside: band kids are by no means "unpopular." just because they don't wear A&F or Hollister or w/e and don't have sex with half the school (although there is generally inter-band loving) doesn't mean they're losers.
Back to the story: I think that stockholm study is useless. How do you measure "popularity?" Show me the data! I can see maybe confidence and happiness in life growing up as being factors in general health, but the popular kids aren't always the most confident or happy.
Band kids are almost all confident and happy
Yes I am one. haha
Eireann says:
Wed, 30th Sep 20091:34 pm
I was nowhere near "popular" in school, and I'm still very antisocial now. But I don't feel any need to change, and I'm relatively happy with the way I am. Happiness and general health don't depend on how "cool" you are, or how many people like you. So, yeah, I too think this study is crap.
And yes, I did play clarinet for six years.
S. says:
Wed, 30th Sep 20091:50 pm
I was in marching band for seven years, and many of the people I met there were very popular in school, in the band, and in pretty much every other aspect of their lives.
Gilly says:
Wed, 30th Sep 20092:06 pm
Well I met my now 5 year boyfriend mostly through band. He was 3 years older than me, but he had study hall with me and was in band with me. I can't count the times (during high school and university) that we made out on some sort of band trip! For those that think band kids are "geeky" and innocent, I beg to differ! My first band trip to a concert 1.5hours away involved the senior percussionists getting high at the back of the bus on the way home, and in the later years, going clubbing in whatever city nationals was in! It was a pretty cool thing to be a part of- and it also helped me meet more people, which in turn made me more confident and popular!
KM says:
Wed, 30th Sep 20093:23 pm
Well, it looks like I'd be beating a dead horse here, but I was in band and by no means unpopular, although I wasn't exactly the homecoming queen. Anyway.
I don't think unpopularity alone leads to suicide. I think that perhaps it can get to you, if you let it, but that kind of depression comes from years of poor self-esteem from all kinds of outlets. Yes, we all know kids and teenagers, esp teenagers, are mean, very vicious. But I think letting that get to you comes from a missed opportunity at learning to make friends and be outgoing enough to ensure that you aren't lonely and miserable. It comes from growing up unable to motivate yourself to make yourself happy – and the blame for that doesn't lie solely on the parents, either.
I think children who are happy, not necessarily popular, will grow up to be healthier adults. I wasn't popular, but I'm doing a hell of a lot better than a lot of "popular" people from my high school – and we're only in our last year of college.
Remind me again why we're doing studies on unpopularity? It's not like it's going to change anything. This reminds me suspiciously of the cell phones and cancer link – if you work hard enough, you can connect the dots, but it doesn't necessarily make the right picture.
And hey, if there was ever a more accepting group of people than the band, I haven't heard about it.
Kelly says:
Wed, 30th Sep 20098:39 pm
I was the cheer captain and my fat ass sat in the bleachers until I fucking broke them. I also wore long skirts.
Erin says:
Thu, 1st Oct 20096:17 am
I was a huge band geek, I'm not ugly and deformed and I had lots of friends, of which I was popular and well liked. I was liked by my teachers for beign smart and my band teaching for being good and helping others. In college I was fine too. As an adult, well 23, I don't have heart problems, I'm not suicidal, although I drink every night, a glass of wine or close to a bottle. But The friends and "power" I had in school, of which I had a little power because the new teacher thought of us more as friends than students sometimes, i have now at my job. I do an important job, people look to me and can always come to ask me questions when they are not sure about something they think I need to do or they can do for me. I like who I am and as far as many of my friends go i don't know about them, I don't some of them any way so let the drama of band geek life play out.
I think they are focusing on children who are too young for the study. I mean what "power" does a 12 year old have? None.Popularity is fleeting, you could be in one week for mouthing off to a teacher and then the biggest loser a day later for something else. Not important.
Nigel says:
Thu, 1st Oct 20098:16 pm
At my school kids already do drugs and some maybe even suicidal. Every kid I know in band isn’t one of those kids. I was actually somewhat depressed until I joined band. Band helped me become more social. Also, how do you make a so called “study” from popularity at a school. Just because you are in band doesn’t mean your going to do drugs, become an alcoholic, and kill your self. I actually made an oath to myself to become straightedge (google it). Band has actually helped me, and from the looks of it, I’d say that the band geeks maybe just as popular (if not more) as the football jocks.