Adam Lambert is bigger than the Beatles?

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are dunzo!

Germans stink in bed. Literally.

Privilege and the Ivy League.

What’s wrong with Tori Spelling?

Lip gloss that curbs your appetite? Hollerrrr.

Wow, this week was a bit of a bummer. So much anticipation and a whole lot of disappointment. You’re probably thinking I deserve it. After all, I got my hopes all up about Mariah Carey and Selena Gomez, so what did I really deserve, right? But I’m still a bit let down because, yes, I was expecting a lot from Mariah. She’s had more #1 hits than any other artist in history and while I wouldn’t listen to her every day in my car, I did think I’d at least like it.

Turns out, you all might be best off just listening to Britney Spears’ new single, “Three,” this week. Or Zero 7. You may not know who they are, but they are great and they really restored my faith in music after that Mimi/Selena letdown. So, thanks, Zero 7! Read More »

Heidi: "What's that smell?" Spencer: "Must be those burritos."

It’s time!

After months of waiting (and trying to avoid anything and everything Speidi-related), The Hills back. Yeah, it’s without Lauren, but she was getting boring anyway. It’s one thing to love her as a person (which I do), but it’s quite another to love watching her on a show (which I slept through).

So bring on Kristin!
Bring back Jusin Bobby’s berets!
Give Stephanie Pratt a cookie!
Give Spencer Pratt a labotomy!

And bring on the drama.

In case you missed it/want to reduce your IQ 100-150 points, Speidi has been doing some sort of live stream leading up to the season premier. Personally, I would rather get a poop facial than support anything those turds do, but someone sent it to me and now I can’t look away.

I. must. look. away.

Anyways, sit tight. Only 20 more minutes until the BIG PREMIER! I’m gonna go cut up an apple for a healthy snack. Wait, who am I kidding? I’m running to the corner for some cookie dough ice cream. I’ll be back!

9:51 PM: Ok, so this ice cream is really good. Not so good: watching the Speidi wedding all over again. She’s wearing my dream dress, that whore.

9:59 PM: What the hell is this Valemont shiz?

10:00 PM: It’s so weird hearing this raspy voice as the new narrator.

10:02: Kristin slapped Lauren? God I hope she smacks someone this season. And I love how they will give her “the benefit of the doubt” and be her friend. Read: “we wanna keep making sick amounts of money by being on this show so we’ll hang out with her.” Read More »

Maybe that single dad show will happen, after all.

Screech’s tell-all is out!

Is that college degree really necessary?

Tyson Beckford has the hots for Obama.

Live large with these giant accessories.

LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian get serious.

Anyone else feeling horribly overwhelmed by the sheer amount of TV on these days? It seems like only yesterday we were watching Crossroads on HBO because there was nothing. else. on. And now? Now our DVR is on overload and we have to cancel plans with our friends to fit it all in.

Case in point: tonight.

I was supposed to be hanging out with a boy I like, drinking the vodka I like and, hopefully, ending up in the position I like, but I had to cancel. Why? Because The Hills is back! I’m not missing out on an evening with the people I love to loathe for some guy.

He’ll be around tomorrow, but The Hills season premiere will only be on once.

Ok, so it will probably be on 1,000 more times this week, but I need to see it now. It’s bad enough I had to wait all summer watching reruns of Parental Control; I can’t wait another minute.

And in honor of the big return, I’ll be live-blogging the whole shebang, from Natasha Bedingfield to the scenes from next week. I’ll be covering the introduction of Kristin Cavallari, the return of now-married Speidi and those annoyingly long commercial breaks full of ads for Axe and the upcoming season of The Duel: 48.

So come back to this here website at 10 PM ET to watch with me. Who knows? Maybe if I’m feeling extra lively, I’ll stick around for the snoozefest known as The City. Maybe. I’m not sure even Olivia Palermo/Whitney’s wardrobe choices can motivate me to sit through that shiz for another season.

The recession is bad news for anyone looking to get a job, save some money or sell a house. But it’s great news for fashionistas! Stores that were once dowdy and just screamed “crazy cat lady” are bringing in new designers to create chic lines at lower prices.

Take JC Penney. When was the last time you stopped in there (not counting those post-Starbucks bathroom emergencies)? I know: never. Because their clothes were cheap, outdated and just not cute. Well, that’s not the case anymore! JCP now sells several lines by popular designers (Charlotte Ronson, Nicole Miller, and Allen B. Schwartz, to name a few) and they not only have stuff that is totes cute, it’s totes affordable as well.  I can’t wait to add some of these pieces to my closet… Read More »

Dorm-room sex. It’s undeniably tricky. Besides the tiny twin beds that limit mobility and often result in dangerous topples from the top bunk, you always have to time your romps just right, waiting for your roommate to step out for an undetermined but hopefully lengthy amount of time.

But dorm-room sex is just as challenging for the non-practicing roommate. Allow me to paint you a word mural:

You’re trekking home to your room after an excruciating night in the library. Your bed is calling your name from across campus, and it’s taking all of your energy just to make it back. Just as you are opening the door and can practically feel your blanket’s sweet embrace wrapped around your body, the familiar moans and grunts of your roommate and her ape-like boyfriend ring like fire alarms in your ears. Sexiled again.

You have two choices: Make your presence known and hope they cease and desist or opt for headphones and heavy metal. Or you can face your fate and spend the night tossing and turning on the cardboard-like couch in the lounge.

Well, if you’re a student at Tufts University, the weight of this hefty decision has been taken off your shoulders once and for all. Under a new ResLife policy, students are not allowed to engage in sexual activity while their roommates are in the room. Read More »

So, it’s the beginning of a new school year, and you’ve got a hot prospect. How can you woo him (or her, as the case may be) and get those googly eyes to focus only on you?

Easy.

It’s like your mom always said: the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Even if you aren’t exactly Julia Child, you can still follow instructions, and that’s all you need to do to bust out a romantic dinner that’ll have him drooling for your food and bolting with you to the bedroom.

Trust me, it’s way better to make food for your dude than take him out. Anyone can whip out a credit card, but it makes you look extra-special if you can whip out a spatula and use it like you’re supposed to. Plus, it’s obviously sweeter to make dinner than to buy it, and it gives you the opportunity to tailor what you make to what your guy really likes. (And it might even inspire him to cook for you . . . swoon!)

Before you get carried away, don’t go all Bridget Jones and try to make super-fancy recipes for multiple courses. Keep it simple, especially if you don’t have a ton of cooking experience. Odds are, your guy loves the classics: what meat-eating man would deny a nicely grilled steak or a plate of spaghetti just like his mom used to make?

So set out that tablecloth, light those candles, put on some tunes, and give these two tried-and-true recipes a whirl. Read More »

The dating life was so simple in college… and that’s mostly because it was nonexistent.

There were more consecutive sunny days in Syracuse then there were couples during my four year stay. Most guys would sprint and leap into oncoming traffic before they would admit to dating a girl and relationship terms like “committed” came to mean a situation in which the guy you were hooking up with (NOT dating) would be a gentleman by driving you home instead of making you do a walk of shame through a subzero blizzard.

However in the real world things are a little different. Guys not only call you back during daylight hours but they also take you on dates to crazy places like sit-down restaurants and the movies. I’m not going to lie, that’s a concept I had begun to assume was made up by Hollywood and the liberal media to sell movie tickets. And the craziest thing of all is that a lot of these guys are looking for relationships and commitment.

Unlike college, there’s a much wider range of men here in the city and it’s much harder to figure out who could be your soul mate and who could take you home and kill you. I’ve learned there’s a big difference between a guy asking you back to his dorm and a guy asking you to get on a train to New Jersey with him because he lives just right outside the city. A guy from class offers to pour you a beer from his pitcher and you chug it down; a guy in the city offers you a drink and you have to send it to toxicology labs first to make sure it isn’t Roofied. Read More »

Question for Tuffaleh?! Email her at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com for the answers of your dreams. Or, perhaps, public humiliation. It depends.

Dear Tuffy Luv,
I moved to the US from Africa in Spring 2006 for college. I had a boyfriend when I moved and we had been dating for over a year by then.We stayed in contact everyday via email, phone, facebook, video messaging and I always went back at least twice every year and spent about 2 weeks with him each time. Everything was fine until summer ’07 came around and I started to have friends and go out more. I met this guy that reminded me so much of my boyfriend (talk,act and even smelt alike). We started getting pretty close until he found out I had a boyfriend. We kinda drifted apart after that but every time we saw each other (like at a party) sparks start to fly again.

I finally got intimate with him 1 year after we met, but stopped seeing him after my boyfriend found out 2 weeks later (we are continents apart and he still found out). My boyfriend broke up with me and it took months of begging him over the phone and a $2,000 airplane ticket to get him back. I was genuinely sorry and I stopped all contact with the other guy. But then I go home this summer and we start to run into each other again. It started off with us locking eyes across the room to little flirts until I found myself in his bed again. Read More »