Sexy Time: The Perfect Striptease


I’m a stripper.

Well, not really, but I have done a good number of amateur nights. I’ve danced on stage naked for strangers, swung around the pole, and even given private dances. I was incredibly nervous my first time, but realized quickly that it was EASY and exhilarating.

I thought this week I would share some tips with you guys on how to give the perfect striptease – I promise it’s easier than you think! Even more, it’s fun and definitely something new and exciting for you and your partner to share. He’ll love seeing you in a sexy new light and you’ll love the power you have to turn him to putty in your hands.

Pick Music Your Comfortable With
Pick a song you know and make sure it’s something you’re comfortable moving to. You don’t have to be a good dancer to give a good strip tease, you just have to be comfortably with whatever you’re doing. If you’re unsure of  your dance moves, pick something slow. If you love to bump and grind, pick something with a faster pace. The song choice doesn’t matter; it’s how you move with it that does.

Take Your Time
The most important component of a strip-tease is the stripping; once all your clothes are off you’re just dancing around naked (your boyfriend will probably love it, but you’ll feel awkward). Take your time removing each item, and wear clothes with buttons or zippers that you can undo slowly…and without awkwardly pulling them over your head.

Be Sensual
Like I said before, you don’t have to be a good dancer to give a good strip tease. Move slowly and sensually. It’s corny but I have to say it anyway: make love to the music. Look like YOU’RE the one getting sexual pleasure from the dance, not whoever is watching you.

Be Interactive
Make eye contact. Give a sexy smile. Play with your partner’s hair or clothing. Sit in their lap. Basically, make your audience part of the experience.

Have Fun
One night I was on stage swinging my legs around and my shoe flung off. Mortifying, right? I kept my cool and laughed it off, joked about it to the few guys who saw, and ended up making even more tips. I assume most of you will probably be dancing for a special someone rather than a group a strangers, so it should be even easier to laugh off any act of clumsiness.

Keep Clean
Believe it or not, the shoe incident wasn’t the most embarrassing stripping experience I’ve ever had. Once I was on stage and realized I had bits of toilet paper stuck in my naughty-bits. I was MORTIFIED and still had to finish my set. Since then I’ve never gone on stage before examining the area thoroughly and I suggest you do the same.

Have a Drink
It’s common knowledge that you feel a little less inhibited when there’s some liquid courage in your system. If you’re extremely nervous or uncomfortable, have a drink before your man arrives. But only a drink; getting woozy and face-planting between his legs isn’t the sexiest part of a striptease.

There you have it, a few simple steps to the perfect striptease. And who knows, if you enjoy it maybe I’ll see you at amateur night some time!



  1. Kelly's Secret says:

    You're awesome! Thank god you don't live in Canada. I hope you are't planning on moving here either. Because if you did I would probably drop to one knee and pull out a fat diamond ring quicker then your clothes could come off to Pour Some Sugar On Me.

  2. Sarah says:

    I want to know where you got that phot from so I can buy a corset like that one! I’ve been searching around but I can’t find one like it, it’s gorgeous!

  3. Dirk Diggler says:

    picz plz

  4. Kelly's Secret says:


    Just because kelly is a happy woman who enjoys sex does not mean she has been sexually abused or needs help. I think all women wish they were as comfortable and enjoyed themselves as much as kelly does in the bedroom. Just because you are not as satisfied as she is does mean you should try to bring her down to your low level.

  5. Kelly - Simmons Coll says:

    Olivia: I have never been sexually abused. I am comfortable with my sexuality. I enjoy sex, especially in a loving relationship like the one I am in now. I also enjoy getting dressed up in cute outfits and acting sexy for strangers, not to mention that the tip money helps me afford my textbooks.

    The notion that women are pure and don't like sex, and that women who do must have been sexually abused, is incredibly detrimental to women. I hope you will be able to look beyond your narrow world view and embrace your own sexuality. Human beings are sexual creatures (or else we would have been extinct long ago) and it's about time we stop shaming ourselves because of it.

  6. olivia says:

    Kelly: You are a classic case of someone who has a history of sexual abuse, or some other form of abuse as a kid, and yet, you can't admit it. You are only hurting yourself. You need to seek help. You mean to tell me that you have no history of molestation, inappropriate sexual touching of you, rape, etc by either an adult or a fellow child when you were young? One of these happened. If not sexual abuse, I can guarantee that you came from a broken home with divorced parents, an abusive dad, or some other childhood chaotic home environment which shattered your childhood experience growing up.

    What was your relationship like with your dad like? Most likely it was awful and your dad was a terrible man. The way you are acting out is typical of this type of childhood dysfunction. Please seek help. Until you can admit the issues from your childhood, you will continue to do this terrible behavior. Please admit the events of your past and seek help. Thank you.

  7. Ava says:

    Who cares if she has had an abusive relationship, abusive home, ect?

    If Kelly is comfortable with who she is, regardless if these events happened or not, why should we knock her down for it? We should embrace others- not tell them they need psychological help.

    There are plenty of other cases which one has come from a broken home and they've grown up completely normal.

    You don't have to embrace your sexuality, no one is forcing it on you.

    And you don't need to tell others what to do either. Now, while your opinion is respected, it isn't shared. So try to be a little bit more lenient to others.. Or people may say you have anger issues and need psychological help.

  8. rach says:

    what on earth, olivia? when i read what kelly has written, i can tell that she is a comfortable and confident young woman. hardly the traits of a victim of sexual abuse who still needs to "seek help". either you must be trolling or seriously demented.

    this is just the article I needed…my boyfriend and I both love to dance, but I always feel awkward "performing" just for him. kelly gave a lot of good tips, and this article promotes having good, clean fun, which is an important part of a healthy sexual relationship. sounds contrarian, but there you have it.

  9. Brad Wellen says:

    Every striptease should end well with some well-deserved pleasure

  10. Brad Wellen says:

    The striptease should inevitably end with a well directed sex tape, see the guidelines at

  11. Campus Diva says:

    This may be the perfect strip tease but check out how to make the perfect sex tape…

  12. Chelseigh says:

    I LOVE stripteases. Im great at them. Im still laughing at the "tissue on your naughty parts" LMAO how does that even happen? Love it.

  13. Karen Affeldt says:

    Great tips! One of my favorite things to do is strip down to some sexy lingerie and lap dance him to heaven.

  14. mollination says:

    I can't believe people like Olivia exist – There should be a zoo or something so I can watch them in their natural habitat. How fascinating. I can most certainly bet that Olivia's father was a.)overbearing, b.) small-minded c.)sexist d.) impossible to please e.)hypocritically puritanical.

    Enough about that though.

    This was a great article and I really appreciate it! I think that's so cool that you do amateaur nights. I've thought about it several times, and I was actually just picking out lingerie for my new boyfriend and contemplating doing exactly as listed above. I think I have his christmas gift taken care of. haha.

    Kelly is awesome.

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