If he really is as great as you think he was, you probably didn't screw him over too bad. He'll find someone else who does want a relationship soon enough.

I find it kind of maddening how some girls say they miss romance and chivalry but other girls like you are nauseated by the idea of a 'relationship'. But men are not a monolithic block, and neither are women. To me, this is kind of frustrating. But it doesn't really matter how I feel about it, it's the reality. There are no rules anymore. There is just terrifying, inscrutable freedom.

I don't know where your nauseation with the idea of love comes from but I think it's kind of sad that you feel that way. I still believe that real love can be something beautiful, something that can give life tremendous meaning and satisfaction. I don't judge you for your feelings but I wonder if you might not be missing out on something really cool.

He was going to be it for me and it was great, including his family. 4 years in, I ended it to be free and adventurous.

I don't regret it, but I often look back and wonder (in fear!) what life would be like if I had stayed.

Don't give up on finding a good one, he'll come along when you're ready.

So to all the chauvinists commenting here with the "nice job, bitch, this is just proof ladies like assholes lol" tirades – um, I'm pretty sure that "being nice" is not the reason you're not getting girls, because you're not exactly being very nice here. You need to pull your heads out of your asses and check your privilege. We don't owe you ANYTHING, no matter how nice you are to us. You'd probably never say that you're REQUIRED to date any girl who is really interested in and nice to you, but that's exactly what you're asking of the OP in your comments. That's called a double standard.

In any case, only being nice to a girl because you want her ass is evidence that you're one of the jerks, not one of the nice ones. I'm not saying that that's what the guy in the post was doing (I don't think it was), but your attitude that "a girl owes a 'nice guy' a yes" seems to suggest that you do that. It's called using people.

So grow the hell up and stop trying to blame women (who are – and I know this may come as a shock – not a hive mind, we all have different attitudes about men, and hey, some women don't even like men) for what are obviously your own problems in the dating department. If you've been having a lot of shitty relationships, or haven't been getting relationships: the common denominator in this is you, not them. I'm not saying you're inherently ugly or undesirable, but your entitled, chauvinistic attitudes toward women suggest you may have some assholeish and arrogant tendencies that are indeed turning women off.

cheers.