Kanye West isn’t dead, people.

Joe Jackson milks MJ’s death for all it’s worth.

Bethenny Frankel’s got a (low carb) bun in the oven.

Cheap, amazing dorm room DIY.

Wanna have a threesome with Gerard Butler?

What jewelry is worth the splure?

While I have had many moments in my long and tumultuous relationship with The Hills where I found myself angry, disturbed or just plain annoyed with what was happening in these Botoxed/bleached/rich for no reason peoples’ lives, I can count on one hand the times I’ve laughed.

One finger, actually. And it was the time that Lauren was talking to crying Audrina at the beach over, you guessed it, Justin Bobby. And what did Lauren say? “Homeboy wore combat boots to the beach.”

LOL.
ZOMG.
ROTFL.

But last night it happened again. There I was eating Fiber 1 Frosted Mini Wheats (which, by the way, are amazing) when Speidi goes to a party with Sister Montag and she gets trashed and does this weird arm wave drunky dance against the window. It was one of the finest moments of TV I’ve seen all week. Although that’s not saying much, because I watch shows like “Bridezillas” and “The Biggest Loser.” Read More »

They may be cute, but not when they’re swarming the country!

Who is Nick Jonas’ new girlfriend?

Seven things guys like to hear.

Rihanna’s latest is leaked!

Whitney Port and…Leo DiCaprio?!

Budget handbags we’re totally lovin’.

Presenting: the epitome of "I don't like your boyfriend...er...husband."

There is a stop on the Chicago Red Line train with a mosaic of passengers’ thoughts, photographs and stories expressed on individual tiles arranged on a cement wall. While browsing the collage the other day, the following remembrance struck me: “I’ll never forget this stop. This is where my best friend told me she didn’t like my boyfriend and we have never been the same since.”

I had two reactions to this: one, you’re an idiot for opening your mouth; and two, you’re an idiot for letting it ruin your friendship. Upon further review, however, this situation is a little trickier, and a little stickier, than I originally thought.

We have all been in this situation: one of your friends is dating a total jackass. Standard procedure is to discuss his McDouchery with the rest of the group, nickname him something awesome like “fart stick” or “lady balls,” then wait a couple months until he’s out of the picture, and she too can laugh about his pompous political discourse.

But what about the girlfriend who has is still dating that jerk? When is it appropriate – and wise – to tell your friend that her boyfriend sucks?

Here a few crucial factors to consider before opening your mouth.

Read More »

Thanks to the tips of a fellow CollegeCandy writer (thanks Cristina!), I have discovered a website I never knew existed. After getting over the fact that I was forced to live this long sans this site, I embraced the new find and I’m loving it!  It’s called Karma Loop and they have a great selection of some awesome brands. But even better, they have a giant sale section (seriously, there are hundreds upon hundreds of things!) that has tons of awesome goods for totally affordable prices.

Naturally, I found 8 things that you can’t live without and, thanks to the low prices, you really don’t have to: Read More »

Yup, that's what $18,000 worth of Elvis hair looks like.

I’ve sold a few items on eBay, and it’s truly wild what people will buy these days (although no one wanted my used retainer… strange). Recently, a clump of Elvis’s hair sold for $18,000 at an auction in Chicago. I don’t know how I feel about this. Someone just legitimately purchased old hair follicles and dandruff for the price of a small car. This got me thinking:

What other celebrity items would make a killing on the auction block?

You know what would make a good centerpiece at the dinner table? Michael Phelps’ bong. Stick a few flowers in it and call it a vase. I mean, that’s what he was using it for, wasn’t it? Better yet, MP should put some of those luscious speed suits up on Ebay. Who wouldn’t pay a pretty penny to get that up close and personal with his junk?

And what about the prosthetic vampire teeth Robert Pattinson wears in Twilight. I bet some young pre-teen would crack open her piggy bank for that item. Used, of course. Perhaps we should add them to our New Moon gift basket. Talk about a good addition to your Halloween costume. Famous fangs!

And Lord knows Amy Winehouse has a ton of stuff to sell (to pay for her daily dose of horse tranquilizers, of course):

Amy Winehouse’s hair extensions – $50
Crack pipe – $100
I just wonder what she could get for that last shred of dignity. It’s simply priceless. Read More »

Worn correctly, accessories can take an ordinary, plain outfit and transform it into an extraordinary one. Personally, I’m in amore with accessories, especially jewelry.

This season, the fashion world is all about neon and bright colors. Yes, even during the winter. Bright tights under dark skirts, bright purses to add a splash of color to any outfit… I like to think designers like Michael Kors, Diane Von Furstenberg and Christian Siriano are doing their part to put an end to seasonal depression. And I applaud that.

Especially when it’s happening with fun and cheery bracelets that will brighten any dark and dreary winter day.  Like Ettika’s braided neon bracelets that celebrities love. They are so simple, adorable and fun. And I want a million of them.

Problem is, they’re expensive for being a simple (yet fabulous!) piece of jewelry. $24 for one bracelet? I don’t think so!

Good thing they’re incredibly easy to DIY on the C-H-E-A-P. Add a little neon-cheer to your winter and make these bracelet on your own.

What You’ll Need:

1. Neon Satin Cord: You can pick this up at most fabric/trimming/art stores. You can even get it at the Container Store. You’ll need about 1.5-2 feet each of 3 different neon colors of satin/silk thread. This will be enough for one bracelet (with a little extra depending on wrist size). If you want to save some money and get the most for your buck, buy a yard of each color so you can make way more bracelets!

P.S. If you live in NYC, you’re in luck because the Fashion District has about a million fabric/trimming stores. Try M&J Trimming (they are the bestest).

2. Superglue: Since the satin or silk thread is very slick, the superglue will help keep the ends of the thread in the clasps. Use the type with a brush – it makes the application easier (and prevents it from getting on your hands/getting your fingers stuck together). Also, whenever using superglue on your bracelet, only use a little! Read More »

"OMG! I forgot I packed all these empty Bacardi bottles!"

At the end of senior year I shoved all my belongings into boxes and garbage bags without using any kind of rational order or logic. Whatever could fit in my boxes went in — and whatever couldn’t fit got thrown away.

Perfectly good pots and pans ended up in the dumpster (and soon after in a dumpster diver’s kitchen) while perfectly useless items like homemade off the shoulder t-shirts got rolled in bubble wrap and packed away.

This past weekend I moved into my new apartment and began unpacking all my boxes. It was like 8 nights of Hanukkah all rolled into one. I had forgotten I owned half of that stuff so each time I reached into a box and pulled something out it was like winning a raffle. The kind of raffle where you win prizes that are good for a laugh, yet have no purpose…a broken shower radio, a dirty mug, stolen freshman year dorm posters, a lime green shoe bag, 75,000 dryer sheets.

Basically nothing useful or even decorative for my new apartment. But they come from college and even though they should have been thrown out months ago, I can’t bear to part with them now. I held up every item and explained to my mother what each one meant to me. However she was increasingly less entertained as my stories got more personal. She finally cut me off at  “oh here’s the pregnancy test I – I mean my roommate – used one time she thought she was pregnant.” Read More »

Question for La Tuff?! Email her at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com and get that it answered proper!

Dear Tuffy Luv,

My boyfriend wants to have sex all the time. At first I was OK with it but now I just want to hang out sometimes. We still go on dates but its like he needs to have sex every single day. I’m stressed out! This is a busy semester for me – sometimes I just don’t feel like it! How can I tell him without hurting his feelings?

Thanks Tuffy!

Tired

Dear Tired,

Repeat after me: Get your goddamn hands off of me.

Okay, sorry kids. Aunt Tuffy is having a busy couple of weeks herself so the idea of some dude forcing his overactive weewee on someone who is too tired to do it right now, goddammit–well, it makes Aunt Tuffy a little tired herself.

But, back to you.

In any case, Tired, I’m sure he’s not doing it on purpose. The fact that he still wants to go on dates and everything is reassuring. If, like, he just wanted to have sex and DIDN’T want to do the whole dating this anymore, well, then I’d say the guy is cheating or just biding his time. But that doesn’t sound like the case here. Read More »

My dearest Cosmo has always had a special affinity for body language analysis (I think they’ve done Speidi like 6 times). Now they’re taking it to the next level and making it all easy, convenient and user-friendly for you!

Cosmo understands the trials and tribulations of dating, especially when we need to figure out the bizarre and complex behavior of the male species.

Finally fed up with trying to decipher a guy’s body language to decide what he’s really trying to say (as opposed to, ya know, listening to him), Cosmo has provided the ultimate guide to date night body language. And, naturally, they made convenient tear-out cards (because your date totes won’t notice you squinting to read them under the table).

Cosmo Says: If he holds his beer loosely by the neck, it means he’s confident–but cocky, “it gives off the vibe that he’s too cool to be concerned with the risk of dropping his Bud.”
Kari Says: Hm, I’d never thought of it that way. Then again I’ve never really taken the time to study a hot guy’s precise style of drink-holding (I’m usually too busy checking out his hair, eyes, smile, biceps, etc). This particular method of holding a beer tells me he doesn’t want his hand to be all clammy and gross should he need to shake hands – not that he’s necessarily a douche bag. For that tip off I would look for a guy clutching his Jaeger bomb tightly so he won’t drop it while he’s fist pumping. Just sayin’…

Cosmo Says: If he pushes his drink onto your side of the table, he’s subconsciously trying to bond.
Kari Says: Alright, I’m down with a little bit of bonding. I just hope he doesn’t change his mind after I proceed to drink whatever he’s sliding toward me. My interpretation of anyone moving alcohol within closer proximity of me is that I should drink it – quickly. But maybe I just play flip cup too often.

Cosmo Says: If a guy licks his lips, he’s trying to wipe a lie off of them.
Kari Says: First of all, this sounds like it could be stitched onto a pillow somewhere in my Gramma’s house.   Second of all, I have heard the lip-licking lie detector test before (Lie to Me is one of my new fave shows), so this interpretation may have merit. But what if he’s just thirsty? Or in dire need of some Chapstick? What if he’s thinking about other things he’d like to lick later? All I’m saying is that I wouldn’t be so fast to jump to conclusions about the nature of such a sexy move (when done correctly, of course – otherwise it’s just creepy). Read More »