Can We Leave Chris Brown Alone Now?

In the early decade, America was swarmed with teen pop (and R&B) stars. After all the greats had grown up and moved on to better things, we were left starless. Destiny’s Child had become Destiny’s Woman. Brittany Spears had gone from a teen cutie to a sexy bombshell that you had to convince your parent was still making albums with no parental advisory. Backstreet Boys turned to Backstreet Men. N’Sync turned to…Justin.

And then – voila!- there was Aaron Carter, Lil Bow Wow, B2K, Lil Romeo, 3LW, Ciara, Jo-Jo, Jesse McCartney, and yes, even our occasional Disney Actors “ternt sangas” (as T-Pain would say). But where were the breakthrough stars?

Then, we met Chris Brown and Rihanna.

Where do I begin? Robyn “Rihanna” Fenty met us fresh out of high school with island sounds and a pretty face. America hadn’t seen anything this hot since Beyonce went solo. She was sexy, had a cute bohemian accent and best of all, she was young. I won’t say she had a voice like Whitney, but with her island themed club bangers and heartbreaking lyrics, she appealed to the industry and slowly but surely became a household name. Finally, after the release and re-release of her third and most sought after album of 2007 “Good Girl Gone Bad,” we knew she was just getting started. She became the face of Def Jam, Covergirl and the tabloids all in one year. Where did she hang out? What was she wearing? Who was she dating? In 2008, we found out.

Chris Brown. A singing, dancing phenomenon who was thought by some to be “the second coming” of the King of Pop himself, Michael Jackson. His first album featured the traditional heartbreak and high school love affairs that we all loved, but there was something more. He was a pretty boy; girls LOVED him, old and young. We wanted to know where he’d come from with such fluid moves and a voice that could make us melt. He was a hybrid star; the LeBron of the music world. He managed to dance his way to two double platinum albums, countless sold-out concerts and even made a few movies.

So when we figured out that RiRi and Chris were together, we were nothing but excited. Sure they weren’t some hip-hop billionaires like Beyonce and Jay-Z, but they were young and cute and you just wanted to see them succeed.

And then everything changed. One night we were watching the Grammy’s and the next thing we knew Rihanna’s face was plastered all over TMZ with captions like “Chris beats RIhanna to a pulp,” and “Couple believed to be Rihanna and Chris Brown have domestic dispute gone bad.”

I’m not here to go into details of the fight. I don’t care what sort of extreme nagging Rihanna did, whether Chris was texting another girl, or if Rihanna gave Chris an STD (as this was all speculated at some point). I don’t even care if Rihanna hit him first. Chris Brown, a 250lb, 6’3”, 5th degree belt had no right to strike Rihanna.

But this isn’t about him hitting her. He said he was sorry. He said it on TV, he said it online, he said it on the radio with songs like Crawl and Changed Man. He apologized to his fans, to his family and, most of all, to Rihanna. He let Larry King rake him over the coals. Both were seen together at Diddy’s house just days after the incident, yet, even after all of this, the media continued to berate only Brown. Both artists had scheduled tour dates thy had to rearrange, both had new albums they’d been working on, both had fans that suffered.

So why does it seem like our culture can’t see through the publicity stunt that Rihanna used to sell her albums?  She told Diane Swayer, “If I didn’t have little girls looking up to me, I’d have stayed with him.” Uh, really? She can say that, but we can’t let Chris Brown perform on GMA?

Lest we forget that a few weeks ago, when asked what she wanted for Thanksgiving, Rihanna said “Food and Sex.” Her new album seems to be following along the lines of Disturbia, with songs like Russian Roulette that have dark lyrics about death, love and sex. In another interview she said that her next boyfriend “better be well endowed, because size matters.”

Am I the only one who heard that? Are we missing something here?

Lately, it seems like we’re punishing the wrong person. Chris went to court, admitted to his wrong-doings, was fined, charged, and shunned. He wasn’t even allowed to go to Michael Jackson’s Memorial to pay tribute to the man who singlehandedly influenced his entire career. Don’t get me wrong – he should’ve been punished, but when will it be over?

All I’m suggesting is that when Whoopi Goldberg said the media – specifically GMA – was being unfair to Chris Brown when choosing not to give him a concert during their holiday concert series, I agreed. He did his time, he made his amends. Let’s move on.

And while we’re at it, why not let Adam Lambert swing by? Crotch snorkeling can’t be worse than anything else we’ve seen on TV. Especially at the American Music Awards.



  1. It sounds like your victim-blaming. Who cares if Rhianna timed her first interviews to coincide with her new album. The girl got beat to a pulp by the guy she loved, she may as well find some silver lining.

    The way you talk about Rhianna's sexual comments as something that should prevent punishment of Chris Brown is just sickening. It's the same tactics defense lawyers use against rape victims in court. It's also why there are laws BANNING the use of a victim's sexual history against her in court. And Rhianna's comments are much tamer than other celebrities (Megan Fox, for instance).

    If the media forgives Chris Brown and we all end up bumping and grinding to his next hit, we're basically condoning domestic violence. Yeah, he said he was sorry. And maybe he does deserve a second chance. But it's going to take a lot more than a few interviews and pop songs to convince me he's a changed man.

  2. We can't leave Chris Brown alone because his current actions show no remorse of what he did.

    For example, just today on Perez Hilton, there is a quote from his Twitter: "im tired of this shit. major stores r blackballing my cd. not stockin the shelves and lying to costumers. what the fuck do i gotta do… WTF… yeah i said it and i aint retracting shit. im not biting my tongue about shit else… the industry can kiss my ass."

    He's tired of being judged and not having his CDs stocked? Sorry, but that is the price you pay for punching your girlfriend in the face.

    He if he was sorry, he wouldn't have made all the public statements that he has. If he was truly sorry, he wouldn't be telling the "industry" to kiss his ass. If he was a truly decent human being, he wouldn't have beat Rhianna multiple times.

    I don't think anyone should leave him alone because in doing so, that turns his crime into something not important. What happened to Rhianna is serious, especially because it happens to many people out there, and just because he is famous and he paid his fines, does not mean he should be forgiven.

    What should Chris Brown do? Go the fuck away. For a year or two. Shut his mouth. Take a course is decorum. And actually do something proactive from his situation. Mouthing off and pondering why his current album has no sales is not the way to go.

  3. James Minor says:

    You are just talking about the female perspective. Chris Brown already apologized for his actions and their is nothing else he can do. Stores who aren't stocking his cd are being bias and no matter what he did, they should stock his cd. I do agree he should of stayed out for a year but since he didn't, I don't think he should get penalized for it. So I don't agree about stores not stocking his cd and also about not playing his songs, the man apologized and thats the best he can do.

  4. Little J says:

    This article made me sick to my stomach. Victim-blaming (what you're doing here) is one of the main reasons that rape and domestic violence victims often don't seek to bring their attackers to justice, because people like you make them feel ashamed for what happened to them. TO them.

    A woman's sexual history is entirely irrelevant when it comes to situations such as these. Regardless of a woman's sexual history, no ALWAYS means no, and it is NEVER okay to hit a woman.

    To say that the media needs to lay off of Chris Brown is to imply that there should be no consequences for his horrendous actions. Chris Brown deserves everything he has gotten from the media, and more. Just because he's a celebrity doesn't mean that he doesn't have to face the consequences of what he did, and just because he's sorry that does not make it okay, nor does it mean that everyone needs to automatically forgive him.

    The fact that Rihanna is talking about what happened to her, and is moving past it, is truly commendable, and I have respect for her for being able to speak out about it. Nothing about any of Chris Brown's "apologies" has come across as sincere or the least bit genuine. And if, as he says, some stores are boycotting his new album? Then good, I'm glad. He shouldn't profit from what he did.

  5. First of all, I want EVERYONE to understand what I'm saying;

    In NO way do I agree with domestic violence. It's wrong. It's cowardly. And as a role model, it was simply a bad idea. However, as a journalist, I feel almost compelled to remind everyone that it's not our job to judge the people we report about. We just tell the story. And the fact is, Chris Brown HAS expressed remorse. What do you want him to do? Not be upset about his career as it starts to sink?

    Let's be real; he's an artist, and when you sign up for the fame, it comes with everything-the good, the bad and the ugly. So yes, he made some bad choices, and yes he said he's sick of the media treating him like he hasn't said his apologies but honestly, it's his career. I'd be worried if he wasn't concerned. If you don't want to forgive him FINE. Don't buy his album, talk shit about his poor decisions and defend Rihanna. That's fine. But it's not up to the media to forgive him. We just tell the stories.

    My position is this: Chris Brown hit his girlfriend. Bad decision. The media blackballing him. An even badder decision.

    Finally, I'm am NOT blaming the victim. I'm presenting the facts. There are no coincidences in life as far as I'm concerned and won't treat her actions (or his) as such. You can interpret what I said anyway you choose but the facts prove themselves.

    One last thing. Perez Hilton is an over-dramatic, pretentious jack ass and I don't feel like he or his sight is even worthy of a mention in regards to anything I write. Are you serious?

  6. Little J, Darling, misread as much as you want, I'm making myself very clear, there are no grey areas and I'm not blaming Rihanna for anything. She said what she said, victim or not.

  7. Little J says:

    You're free to express your opinions, that's the beauty of this country. And i'm free to express mine. Just know that I disagree with your opinion, and while I'm usually a fan of almost everything on CollegeCandy, you've lost me as a reader.

  8. Vivid says:

    I'm not really feelinf Rihanna anymore & i used to bump her music all the time but now i see that she is mad fake. She lies about little things like about not hearin Changed Man and the interview she just did saying she sleeps in tshirts when 2 weeks ago she was saying she sleeps nude! If you lie about the little stuff you will definitely lie about the big stuff.

  9. Ok Little J, Well if you come back to comment or read my comments, I'll end with this;

    I agree with you in your feelings about domestic violence. It's wrong and it's never okay to resort to violence. What you're implying, however, is that I support his actions. I DO NOT. You won't read anywhere in this story, that I blame Rihanna at all, because I don't. I'm sorry that I'm loosing you, but I'm sure there will be more.


  10. Rosine says:

    The media rejecting his music is an "even badder" decision than him beating his girlfriend? You're joking, right? There are consequences for his actions. Do you honestly expect his career not to suffer? He brought on these consequences through his own choices actions.

    However you try to defend this article, you are clearly being critical of Rihanna or at least critical of the media for not being more balanced when it comes to portraying the events. I wonder, how do you make a story of a woman being beaten fair and balanced? Rihanna has done nothing wrong and the public reaction to Chris Brown has been appropriate in recognizing this.

    To be quite honest, I'm disgusted with this article.

  11. Lenny says:

    Aside from needing a proof-read, this article also needed to find its focus. Okay, we need to lay off Chris Brown. What does Rhianna's sexual history have to do with that? And why should she be punished for talking about sex on talk shows and songs, yet male artists can say all they want about it with no feedback?

    You say her new music is dark and about love. That reflects what shes gone through; it'd be stranger if it was happy and joyous. Please leave Rhianna out of this, the comparisons make it seem like you think she is "getting away" with something, when in fact that is far from the truth.

  12. Bailey says:

    I don't claim to know anything about your personal life, Jasmin, but I'm guessing you've never been abused by someone you loved, or known someone who has been.

    Yes, it's unfortunate for Chris Brown that this caused his sales to drop and his image to go down, BUT domestic abuse is not something that disappears within a few months, or a year, or even a few years. To those affected by domestic abuse, the figurative scars are there for life. The pain may lessen over time, but will not ever go away.

    In my opinion, part of the reason he's failing so miserably is because of the public backlash of those who have experienced, directly or indirectly, the effects of domestic abuse. For those who have been there, it's not something that you can just shrug off. Statistics don't lie – there are incredible numbers of domestic abuse cases yearly in the US, and the people who are affected by it are not just the people directly injured.

    Domestic abuse doesn't just go away, and it's unfortunate that some people assume it will. It is unfortunate that Brown lost his temper and beat her to a pulp, but it isn't something that will fade from public attention anytime soon, in my opinion.

    And Jasmin, patronizing your readers isn't going to help you gain others.

  13. Bailey I don't consider my explanation to be patronizing. All of what I said is what I believe. All of what is being speculated about what I said and being assumed from what I said is not. It's just that simple. I'm not a journalist because I want people to agree with me. I'm a journalist because I want people to think. I'm glad that I have so many comments; if I didn't, I wouldn't be doing my job.

    In response to you not "claiming" to know anything about my personal life, I appreciate it. My opinions about domestic violence could not be any more clearly stated if I had titled my article "Domestic Violence is like a Disease". It infects everyone that gets involved. I stand on everything I wrote.

    Finally, Lenny, my focus is on the topic at hand- the media vs. Chris Brown. Rihanna has just as much to do with it as he does. I'm not blaming her nor am I insinuating that she "got away" with anything. She was a victim. Plain. Simple. I hope everyone can understand my position and what I was trying to say in my article.

    I appreciate all of your comments, and despite our differences in opinion, I hope you continue to read. I don't seek your approval, but I most definitely seek your respect.


  14. Star says:

    Most people have already expressed their opinion about not liking this article and I agree with that, so I'm not going to repeat those statements. I don't feel the auther believes domestic violence is right in any way but I do believe that a few apologies, no matter how sincere, don't just make it go away. Chris Brown should still be responsible for what he did.

    I think that Rihanna's comments were true. She had feelings for him and if she hadn't been a role model for so many young girls she might have gone back to him. That was honest and I'm proud of her for admitting it. She was strong enough not to go back though because so many people look up to her and she wants to set a good example.

    Also, their lives are none of our business. Personally I think blogs like this just add more fuel to the fire. Who cares what you or anyone else thinks, or even what I think about it for that matter?

  15. Bailey says:

    Jasmin, I'm going to say this as honestly as I can. As a fellow journalist, newspaper editor, and writer, I would not call this a shining example of journalism. At best, this is an OpEd or, as blogging has become known, "citizen journalism." I completely understand what you are saying here, but I do not think you've expressed yourself in the best way.

    I know that I've probably offended you, and I do apologize for that. I just don't think you understand how much your opinions expressed here, stated as fact, offend your readers. These are your opinions, not a factual, journalistic article.

    I will certainly continue to read, as I do respect you as a writer and I appreciate a mental challenge such as this. You're right – an article that makes people think is something to strive for. However, I hope that next time you're able to state your opinions more clearly so that you don't have to clarify after the offense has been made. After all, how many CC readers don't scroll through the comments?

    I don't think it's your opinion that's the problem. I think it's the way you expressed it. If you disagree with me, that is entirely fine – I respect that.

    I know this has little to do with the article itself, but I just wanted to offer my own opinion, as a fellow journalist, on why everyone is up in arms. I look forward to reading further articles from you.

  16. Nahtrelle says:

    Chris made a mistake.

    Just cause he's famous, doesn't give us any right to judge him.

    Shit happens.

    Let him live.

    Geez people, it's not like he beat your ass.

  17. Jason says:

    Why are people still entertainig this idiot? Stop buying his albums and let him fade into obscurity. Women beaters should not be allowed any air time.

    If girls are really looking for some good looking singers,have the americans heard of an english band called JLS?

  18. s says:

    you've got to be fucking kidding me. what does her sex life have to do with ANYTHING?!? Just because she wants her next boyfriend to be well endowed doesn't mean that we should all look at her sideways. Even if you do think everyone should give chris brown a break, "Lately, it seems like we’re punishing the wrong person." realllly?!? why should SHE be punished now? because shes still talking about it? Oh and he didn't just "hit her" he beat the crap out of her.

  19. B. Schmidt says:

    To the author:

    This "article" makes me want to go all Chris Brown on your ass.

  20. Tawana says:

    I agree with this article.

    FIRSTLY: YES it is WRONG to hit anyone. woman or man. and its always best to walk away.


    SECONDLY: Chris brown is paying off his dews and he is going to counseling and we need to STOP judging HIM as a person and start looking at the action itself. Lets start looking at what we can now do to CHANGE how other people handle situations. Its PLAIN selfishness that you are hating on ONE person…JUST ONE PERSON. ARE YOU PEOPLE OKAY? seriously…when you walk in the street, or probably the person standing next to you or behind you in line at a store is probably someone who is going home to a girlfriend or wife and BEATS them!!! YOU have no idea. OPEN YOUR EYES. you are wasting too much energy on Chris Brown's title…you need to focus on how to help young children and even adults stop this violent behaviour. Its only naive to say that Chris Brown is a bad person, because, GUESS WHAT, HE WAS NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO HIT A GIRL AND HE WONT BE THE LAST. so stop being immature. seriously. get a grip. I wonder what HALF of you who spend time bashing him are even doing to help with the situation. This is also why women wouldnt even want to cry out loud for help because they are stuck in a position where they love the guy sooo much that they tell themselves that the hitting is okay and if they tell someone then the world will judge the person they love the same way YOU ALL are judging Chris Brown. You need to show them that its better to let someone PUBLICLY admit their wrongs and then get help.

    Chris is not a robot. dont expect him to get better in 30 seconds flat. counseling takes take. SO STOP THE PRESSURE. you're acting like you are perfect yourself. seriously. stop judging.

    AS for RIhanna…excuse me but if you are a role model and YOUNG girls look up to you, then dont talk about wanting sex and food for thanksgiving…what the HELL are you promoting rihanna.

  21. Maggie says:

    Excuse me. Chris Brown has NOT paid his dues. Half-assed apologies and going to court because one is MANDATED to is not paying dues. You know what would constitute his dues? Visiting battered women's shelters. Raising awareness about domestic abuse through charity organizations. Teaching young men that you can't do what he did and get away with it. He should have cut some massive checks for the benefit of abused women. Bitching and moaning on twitter makes him come across as a raging ingrate and narcissist. I'm glad he's getting blackballed.

  22. D. says:

    Although I do think this whole thing has helped raise awareness of domestic violence, I'm with Tawana. Continuing to bash him publicly isn't really going to be conducive to reform.

  23. Whew! you guys are hot on my case! I love it! And I love you guys for reading! All these perspectives (or two; those who disagree and those who don't) make for interesting discussion. I don't wanna sound redundant but it's just my opinion; I single handedly can't make or break his career.

    Thank you all so much for letting me hear you

  24. sara says:

    I didn't see the article as blaming Rihanna for her abuse. I thought the author was just trying to note that Chris Brown is not the only one who has done questionable things. Granted, physically assaulting someone is worse than making sex comments, but the point that I got from the article was that Rihanna isn't a sweet angel all the time either. Good article, I liked it!

  25. Jessica says:

    i agree with tawana. what he did was wrong, and for all of you that keep insisting that he hasn't paid his dues, it's because he's in the PROCESS of paying them. it doesn't take a day people.

    & i don't get why rihanna would talk about sex as a role model for "young girls". we already know kids grow up wayy to fast now. but if anything, i like the lyrics of her music… it's just too dark for me.

  26. Rose says:

    I do not have any respect for this article, and it makes me sad to find women that think like this.

    Jasmin, you write: “So why does it seem like our culture can’t see through the publicity stunt that Rihanna used to sell her albums?” UM REALLY? You think Rihanna asked Chris Brown to beat her up? You think she wanted this to happen for her records to sell?

    “She told Diane Swayer, “If I didn’t have little girls looking up to me, I’d have stayed with him.” Uh, really? She can say that, but we can’t let Chris Brown perform on GMA?” Rihanna’s case is so real and so raw that it breaks my heart. So many women are abused and stay with their abuser because they believe they can change them or that things will get better. Rihanna acknowledging that is so brave because it draws attention to the sick psychological issues that come with domestic abuse.

    As others have mentioned, please explain why talking about Rihanna’s sex life is relevant, you keep talking about journalism but this article is terrible and if you believe it has any merit then you are a poor journalist.

    “Lately, it seems like we’re punishing the wrong person.” IF THAT ISN’T VICTIM BLAMING, I don’t know what is?! Did you read this out loud to yourselves? Don’t you realize how wrong this is? You’re being so contradictory and you aren’t making any valid points.

    “All I’m suggesting is…He did his time, he made his amends. Let’s move on.” Actually you’re suggesting more than that. You’re suggesting that its okay for men to abuse women if we let a couple of months pass by and they give fake apologies.

    The media blackballing him is what he deserves. I don’t care about Chris Brown and I would be happy if I never had to hear from him again.

    “I’m presenting the facts…You can interpret what I said anyway you choose but the facts prove themselves.” that you sway with personal opinion…how can you not see the flaws in your argument?

    “One last thing. Perez Hilton is an over-dramatic, pretentious jack ass and I don’t feel like he or his sight is even worthy of a mention in regards to anything I write. Are you serious?” Is this a fact? His writing and his ‘site’ is a lot better than this article, that’s my honest opinion.

    Can you defend yourself properly please before I lose all faith in mankind?

  27. Zoe says:

    Completely off topic but I hope Jasmin was being ironic when she spelt Raison D'etre as "Razon Detra".

    The 9's would agree.

  28. Kay says:

    I completely agree with all the readers who disagreed with the content and tone of this article. I understand that it's important for people to think about issues like this–but you have by no means presented both sides Jasmin. Domestic violence is already a kind of hush-hush issue, so trying to blame the victim in the situation in any way only continues that. Shouldn't we be trying to start a dialogue about this issue?? One that is as unbiased as possible?? What message does an article like this send to people who may have personal experience with domestic violence? Don't speak up about it because you will be criticized.

    I also think it's interesting that you're talking about how we're punishing Chris Brown, when I see tons of facebook statuses talking about how great he is, when so many teenage girls I talk to think Rihanna must have done something to provoke him (that somehow makes his actions okay?). If this is what you call punishment, I don't think the message is getting through very clearly.

  29. Shannon says:

    I don't think Chris Brown is punished enough. Physical violence is never excusable. I don't care what Rihanna did or didn't do. If a politician is found beating his girlfriend, do you think the public is going to vote for him again? Why would the public let Chris perform at a memorial for Michael Jackson?

  30. Kassie says:

    I feel like the author was trying to make the point that it is not the media's place to punish an artist; that the media is supposed to be objective and unbiased and their only job is to report facts. However, stores who blackball his CD are independent of the media and they refuse to sell his CD because they do not want to be associated with the negativity that is surrounding Chris Brown. By refusing to sell his CD, they have disassociated themselves from him and his actions.

    I do not feel that the author is "victim-blaming." I feel that she is saying that there are two sides to every story, but the only side that people are willing to listen to is Rhianna's.

    Chris has a side to this story that no one wants to hear, and although his actions were 1000% WITHOUT A DOUBT UNACCEPTABLE, we don't know what lead up to the incident.

    Listen, it is NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE acceptable for someone to abuse someone. Domestic violence is NEVER OK! And while many people just look at what Chris did, people fail to look at what part Rhianna played in this situation. There is a difference in a man beating his girlfriend everyday because she didn't prepare his dinner correctly and a man hitting a woman after being repeatedly punched, slapped, scratched, and bitten for however long while confined to the small space of a car.

    I want to reiterate that DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IS NEVER OK, but seriously, people can only handle so much provocation. I'm not by any means asserting that this is what happened in their situation, because nobody knows the intimate details of that event besides Chris and Rhianna. I am, however, saying that many women have a tendency to slap their men around sometimes because they know that most men will not hit them back. Human beings can only take so much, honestly. IT WAS WRONG FOR HIM TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HER, but he is human. None of us know how we would react in the same situation. Hell, none of us even intimately know the situation.

  31. Jasmyn says:

    I feel that Kassie and I have the same opinion about this article, so I'm going to try not to reiterate…

    Jasmin: I understand where you're coming from with this article, and I definitely see your point where others happen to skim over. Some people can only see what they want to see and not the whole truth of your article (mainly the fact that you don't condone domestic violence. CLEARLY, it's right there in her article people…). The media is extremely slanted. She can get away with all the things you've mentioned because she apparently has done no wrong, and that gives her an instant free pass on anything and everything. People are bound to be either enthralled with what she has to say or have their hearts melt by all that she's been through. They victimize the victim and they criminalize the criminal even more. The media has done all it can to ruin Chris Brown's image, and this is just overkill. If they want to bash him some more, at this point they need to just remove him from receiving attention. There's nothing worse for a celebrity than not receiving any publicity at all. I feel like nobody realizes that it's been TEN MONTHS since this happened, and no new information has came about from what happened that fateful night. So wtf is there left to talk about? Nothing.

  32. J-T says:

    This is flat out ridiculous. Jasmin made a point here. As much as I don't like Chris Brown (mainly because he rated Amerie a 6 and Cassie a 10 on a radio show, but that's outside this case) he shouldn't be constantly picked on whatsoever because of this incident, especially if he did the jail time and community service, especially for his first sentence. Should Chris Brown have his albums not in stores because of this incident? Hell no. I worked hard days and nights to make a damn CD, and if I was told that it wasn't in stores because of some stuff that happened months or even years ago, I would be pretty pissed off.

    The bottom line was that Rihanna, even though she was involved, is keeping some stuff in. We all know that Chris beat her up, point-blank. I've seen the picture (which really wasn't supposed to be released to the public, but we all know how sleazy, nosy, and down-right devilish TMZ is), but I feel that Rihanna's part of this case seems incomplete, but she can't speak it now, since the verdict has already been made.

    I'll be straightforward. I don't give a damn how skinny, tall, fat, short, strong, whatever the hell you are. You don't have the right to hit ANYONE, nor provoke ANYONE to hit you, because all of that is immature and childish, and both Rihanna and Chris were immature and childish for letting it escalate that way.

    The media these days is very cold-blooded, and try to spill out, and even twist, every amount of celebrity dirt out possible for some money.

  33. Nina says:

    I agree with you except the whole Rihanna being a talent, beautiful she is talented ugh not so much. Unfortunately It only took me reading the title of this to know that all the comments would be whining girls still wanting chris brown hung for something that has nothing to do with them and happened 10 months ago. If the girl involved wasn't someone famous this would have blown over months ago, there would have been an outcry but not at this level. Also is it really so hard to believe that stores are blackballing his cd??? And that websites are giving him bad reviews because of what he did not based on his music??? Ay Dios

  34. Shay says:

    Role models don't talk to young girls about how they want Food and Sex and their men to be well-endowed,they also OBVIOUSLY aren't role models if they just left the man to keep young fans. If you wanted to be with him so badly and loved him so badly after he did that to you,why didn't you stay with him and see if he changed or not.

    Both Rhianna and Chris Brown should be played on the air and both should move past this. Now don't get me wrong,I dont agree with abuse either,but carrying this on is not very conducive to the well being of either person..let live what needs to. <3

  35. michelle says:

    wait Chris didnt go to MJ's memorial..since when?


    the media doesn't want to be associated with him. yes he did his time but it's going to take him a lot longer for people to "let it go". i know his fans let it go the second he bit Rhianna.

    i honestly could care less if everyone hates or loves him but the assault is still fresh in our minds and no one has forgotten it yet.

  36. Wtf says:

    First of all no one knows what really happened but her and him.Second it happened … not repeatedly but it happened. like most people male and female we tend to forget that what we say and do mental and physically to other people has a consequence. You play with someone emotionally and things get bad end result. Everyone's not stable enough to handle those types of situations or any situation for that matter. Like most people we have to much of an ego or pride to get away from the situation before it gets out of hand.. instead we make it worst. We fuel the flame and for what? To show how we aren't afraid of said person or to try and win the confrontation and feel like the boss? Men and women become physically violent when emotions become involved just watch cheaters and see for ya self. AND women seem to agree with the violent women when she goes and flatten tires, keys cars, breaks windows, burns clothes and becomes generally hostile and disrespectful. SAME goes for men. what im saying is just this. Learn to shut ya mouth ya mouth sometime instead of feeding the flame …. learn to think about what could possibly be the worst out come of this situation instead of feeding the flame. Its people out here that will put ya lights out. Is it worth the trouble? Unless ya you just that tough then hay proceed.

  37. peace says:

    i agree with this article, how can someone be a role model to young girls if all they talk about is sex and telling young girls to take nude photo of themselves and send it to their boyfriends.recently all RiRi has been doing is taking nude photos. we need to leave this young man alone he is talented.

  38. pia says:

    It would be fine if the media was equal and fair in how they criminalized and publicly punish all celebrities who have committed or experienced acts of domestic violence against their significant others; however they are not. Recently the actor Jonathan Togo of CSI:Miami assaulted his girlfriend at their home but it was only mentioned for 1 day on ET. There has been at least two football players this year who were assaulted by their girlfriends using items like knives or scissors but this was scarcely mentioned in the media. Charlie Sheen and Josh Brolin has also had run-ins with domestic violence against their lovers but the media was very hush about those circumstances.

    I think the media viciously went after Chris Brown and Rihanna instead of letting their respective families and closest confidantes be of assistance to them both. Yes, Chris needed to face the criminal charges and have his day in court, which he has and has satisfactorily met the expectations of the judge according to his last probation update in November.

    Now this is what people have to understand about certain store locations of Best Buy, Wal-Mart or Target not carrying his CD. Chris Brown's label has a distribution deal with Sony for his CD to be sold in these stores. None of these stores have an official statement saying they have refused to sell his album, rather it is certain store managers who are making their own bias judgment to not stock his CD. This is a breach of contract on the behalf of these stores to not stock the CD if there is a contractual agreement for them to do so. Chris has a righteous grievance.

    Overall I do think Chris and Rihanna need counseling to deal with both of their childhood issues of growing up in homes with DV but that is separate from their careers. Both should be given the ability to move forward as long as there is a fanbase that still wants to buy and partake in their forms of entertainment. Anyone who doesn't like it can always turn the channel or radio station.

  39. Mary says:

    Finally, an article that isn't just bashing Chris Brown. The boy is human, he made a HUGE mistake, but why not lift people up when they are down and help them get better?

    No matter what Rihanna did, he should have had control over his own actions, but let the boy live. And we support so many other artists that make huge mistakes. T.I was buying guns, for self defense, but still was going to KILL people with them. Numerous other celebrities have done the same thing Chris did, if not worse but don't own up to it. We don't stop going to see their movies, or listening to their music.

    I commend Chris on standing up and saying that he is going to take responsibility for his actions. No matter what he does at this point, people are going to criticize his every move. Don't forget this boy is 20, 19 when he did this. He's young, witnessed it in his house growing up and he's sorry.

    Put yourself in his shoes, where you made this completely terrible thing that you had witnessed your mom go through, and now you did it. And like he said in one interview, its not a room full of people saying they don't like him, its the whole world. The Whole World. He's 20. What if he was one of your friends? I don't think you would be so quick to hate him.

    I think what he did was terrible, I have always been a huge fan of him and I was completely disappointed when I found out. But, we have to move on, so he can move on and support and lift him up to be a more positive person so he can change.

    And get off of this, "if you buy his album you're supporting Domestic Violence." I'm so sick of hearing that. Do you really believe that Chris supports domestic violence??? I don't think so, he made a mistake people. He's 20. Move On.

    —His album is amazing though. Pure talent. The music industry is going to miss out if they don't let him be.

    P.S Jasmin-University of Missouri –> You've won me over as a fan. People aren't ready to hear truth. Great article, I'm going to visit more often. I hadn't heard of this until I read this Article.













  41. MARISE BOND says:


  42. Jenny says:

    I'll be real quick..Nobody knows what happened t=in that car, we dont know the real story, If Rihanna lied about something as little as not hearing the song Changed Man then it makes you wonder what else she is lying aboiut. Now i dont condone violence at all, but we cant judge here..Chris Brown made a HUGE mistakw and he is paying for it. Rihanna is not being a role model at all to these young girls she claims she influences..something about that interview made me think she isnt telling the whole truth..did anyone notice how she said i kept pushing it and pushing it and i caught him in a lie..well maybe she pushed him to his limit which is no excuse but my parents told me..if you are big enough and brave enough to hit on a man repeatively and constantly then expect to get hit back because violence goes both ways..keep your hands to yourself and you wont have to worry about anything. BOTH Chris and Rihanna should have kept to themselves that night. Thats how i see it.. he has suffered far to long now and its been 11 months. It is now time to move on..What if this was the other way around?? If anyone ever found out that Rihanna beat Chris up then everyone would laugh in his face and be like ohh he's a punk..i think that is so not fair..you cant be a hypocrite and you cant judge, thats up to God to do the judging..So leave him alone now, its over and done with, he is sry and i truly believe he has learned his lesson. And by the way his CD has sold over 610k in just these few weeks its been out..that sounds pretty good to me for someone who's career is apparently over..so the ppl who think that..get over yourselves..you cant deny true talent…AT ALL!!! Merry Christmas!!!

  43. me says:

    I agree with everyone who said if Chris was a normal person would the world be looking for “sorry” from that person. This incident was not ours, it was theirs. Domestic Violence is so much bigger than Chris Brown and Rihanna. My only wish is that at least one person learns from it. I hope they do not learn to hate(CB) but to realize that hitting in a relationship is bad and it is not love no matter who throws the first punch.
    Chris Brown is no where near a “woman beater”. The ignorance shows in some of the comments that were posted. Ignorance because they could’ve never experienced DV because if they have they would know a woman beater when they see one. They are letting the “hype” about Domestic Violence take over their personal judgements. Take it from someone who’s been beaten.
    CB got into a “mutual” fight with his girlfriend. A woman beater beats his partner constantly daring her/him to swing back. They belittle you into believing you can’t leave or you’ll be killed. Its the most awful thing you can go through and it lasts more than 1 night. Can Chris Brown turn into this person? Certainly, if he wasn’t getting help and with age you can change anything if you want. Chris Brown was WRONG and should’ve walked away but he didn’t.
    Has he paid his dues? Far and beyond in my opinion. No matter what you think in your old age, you were a teenager before. Imagine when you were a teenager how you felt if one person hated you. Now imagine how it would feel if the whole world hated you and when you went places people would yell obsentities at you. That in itself for a teenager is alot to bear without having people follow you everywhere you go for 10mths asking questions about something you’re trying to heal from. Then add all the court mandated duties. For Chris Brown I believe he deserves his second chance NOW.
    As for Rihanna. Yes she may have played a part but that’s not my concern. My concern is that in all of her interviews she says she is not getting help. I think every person who has ever been beat up physically, emotinally, and mentally should seek help. Even if she only goes one time to express everything she is feeling because I’m sure her PR people didn’t let her spill everything on 20/20. She is very young and I would hate to see her carry that burden into a realtionship with someone else because it won’t work until she is also healed.

    With all that being said, none of us know exactly what went on in that car and it really isn’t our business to know. Our job as consumers is to chose if we would buy either CD, not based on their personal lives but their music. If you don’t like him don’t buy his CD. Don’t wish something on 1 human being when there are other human beings comitting the same acts but are hiding behind the fact that they’re life is not on public display. I was not a Chris Brown fan before this incident but the media has definitely turned me to listen to his music and for one reason only. I am human and I have feelings and even people who murder other people are forgiven in the eyes of the Lord. Even the man who beat me has been forgiven by me and the Lord. How Chris Brown is being treated is wrong. Everyone has their opinions and this is mine.
    I send all my prayers to both Chris and Rihanna, that that remain prosperous and blessed.
    What do you think about the news being reported that Mary J Blige hit her husband in the face, drawing blood. I wonder how long will it take for the media to push that under the rug! All violence is WRONG!

    P.S. Yes the media should leave him alone. Thanks Jasmin for the reading material.

  44. peter Abraham says:

    I generally believed that both Rihanna and Chris Brown are wrong in this matter but is very unfortunate that chris brown takes the highest blame because of the beating to Rihanna was physically obser Rihanna must has done something that started this fight even going his phone.

    Rihanna is pure Africana who was brought in African where fighting is not seen as much crime.Im not condolleing domestic violent but we should know that chris brown is not insane. Rihanna has started this fight.There is no smoke without fire.

    Rihanna should go for concelling before she will bring more many men down and she has got an atitude and beside American is very knew country for her.Chris Brown must have reacted out of provocation and i believed that rihanna must have done or say something that really hurt him to an extent of losing his temper or her.

    Rihanna should strongly seek conselling before the worst will happened to her.American life style is different from African style.

  45. Jen says:

    I agree with this article 100% we need to move on! I still love Chris and his music! people need to let him be! Really we have all taken this to far! maybe some of the blame needs to be on her and not on him. He apologized and was faced with everything let him be really. One mistake and its what he will be remembered for! Maybe you all need to chill and turn the other check and let him live his life.

  46. Leigh says:

    Generally I listen to songs for the song, not what the artist has done. So… yeah, I still listen to Chris Brown. And enjoy it.

  47. Alice says:

    I'm not of any opinion on the treatment of Chris Brown by the media, although pia brings up a very good point about the contract. So he does have a legitimate claim to complain about it.

    What I don't like about the article and some comments is the victim blaming. Yes, it states clearly that the author doesn't condone domestic violence, but she contradicts herself later in saying that maybe we are blaming the wrong person, insinuating Rihanna? I don't know, even if some people say "she must have done something to provoke him!" (which disgusts me honestly) violence is never the correct response, and particularly violence of that degree. I don't care if she was beating him to begin with, you don't retaliate like that, especially if you are physically superior in every way.

    What is wrong with talking about sexual topics? Does she have to be a complete prude to be a role model? Maybe for just little girls. But for women, girls, people of every age, it speaks a strong message that Rihanna, despite wanting to, did not return to an abusive partner. Which is an important problem in abusive relationships, when the victim returns to the assailant.

  48. Xiandra says:

    You are right. Riri Didn't do a damn thing only using CB to get better. And she is now talking to much about sex, being to sexy this isn't a good example for the teens and using guns and all those worse talking. What you have written I agree with you. CB is on a good way. God Bless him

  49. Yuki says:

    I agree a bit with this article. Though I was totally for Rihanna for the whole incident, I do believe that there seems to be a bit of milking on her or her management's part. I'm tired of all of her songs talking about she's struggling from some oppression and fighting back and all of that crap. Yeah, we know you got abused, but do we need a whole album and feats with the same exact message. Not to say that she shouldn't talk about it but it seems like severe overkill.

    I'm severely upset at what Brown did (especially since I loved everything he came out with) but I do feel that its been a year and he should be allowed to make music again. He knows what he did, he's experienced violence as someone who has been abused and he is a case where blacklisting him won't help. He's already talked about his mom's abuse and it probably kills him everyday that he's done something that he swore he would never do. Just beating up on Chris Brown is now making us the abusers.

  50. kiera says:

    listen, I don't care what you say, but we are not "blaming the wrong person"

    RHIANNA WAS BEATEN UP! if it was your daughter that got beat up by her boyfriend, would you want people saying that we should be blaming her instead of the assaulter?

    This is ridiculous. I'll admit that I loved him before he beat up Rhianna, that he was my favorite all-american boy but I am discusted that you would even think of saything that we are blaming the wrong person. It is ridiculous that people still look up to him and still support him. I thought that this was going to ruin his career, but it hasn't…just proving how ignorant some people can be.

  51. Valkyrie607 says:

    1. I believe you mean to say that Rihanna's accent is "Bahamian," not "bohemian."

    2. Chris Brown has not apologized. He's said he's sorry "about the incident," which is basically like saying he's sorry he got caught. Never once has he come out and said "I hit Rihanna and it was wrong and I'm sorry." Never once has he taken responsibility for his actions. Parroting some mealy-mouthed, passive-voiced apology written for him by his lawyers does not count as paying his dues. Paying his dues would be acknowledging that he has problems with anger and violence, volunteering at a Women's Shelter, and actively modeling correct behavior. Instead he whines about how his CDs aren't selling well.

    3. Implying that Rihanna's talking about sex and her sex life is remotely comparable to Chris Brown's beating her face into a pulp (as in, "they both did something wrong" or "perhaps we're punishing the wrong person") is offensive in the extreme. Rihanna has demonstrated courage by recognizing that her actions have repercussions beyond her personal life and taking up the mantle of role model to younger women, even though she didn't want to. Where has Chris Brown done anything remotely similar? The comparison is damaging and insulting to Rihanna and exuses Chris Brown's serious moral failings.

    4. Your article is not factual, though it includes a few facts. It is a poorly written, poorly organized opinion piece.

    Better luck next time.

  52. Sarah says:

    When I first read this article I thought it was a joke. Upon further reflection I have indeed concluded it is a joke.

    Miss Jasmin-University of Missouri, you need a crash course in journalism and human decency if you think this is appropriate. You're attracting readers from outside your normal circle for all the wrong reasons.

  53. Kimberly says:

    This is the most random reasoning I think I've ever read on the subject. Should the stores still carry Chris Brown's album? Yes. If the public is upset about him still, they can choose to not buy his album, thus affecting his album sales and making their statement with their wallets. But the way this writer implies that both of these people deserve punishment of some sort, while Brown's the only one getting punished, is infantile. The examples given of what Rihanna has done SO wrong, while no one's taking notice and letting her slide while they vilify Brown, make no sense.

    When you write things like, "both had fans that suffered"……I mean, what is your point? She should apologize to her suffering fans for having done WHAT to them? For giving interviews about the incident just before her album was released? Granted, it's questionable timing. But you think she should be berated like he was, because using a personal tragedy to your advantage is equally as bad as assault & battery? Not quite comparable.

    Her statement that she would have stayed with him (which is common for abuse victims)until she realized her responsibility as a role model should have garnered her punishment from the public? You say, "Uh, really? She can say that, but we can’t let Chris Brown perform on GMA?" What is it in that statement of hers that makes her equally as deserving of the public ire as Brown? To compare the two is ridiculous and void of reasoning.

    So, she made overtly sexual statements about her preferences. Ok, and? Maybe it's ME that's missing something here. I don't see how those statements mean that she should be "punished" for anything. If, as a writer, you cannot see how the line, "punishing the wrong person" implies that the blame has been misplaced on Brown and should instead be directed at Rihanna now, then your ability to use words to clearly express your thoughts comes into question. One would think that a writer would have a particularly acute sense of such things.

  54. snmt says:

    everything else has been said, so here's my choice comment:

    "he or his sight"

    really, College Candy? really? someone who doesn't know the difference between "sight" & "sight" is writing on your site? or perhaps they are "righting" for your "sight"

  55. brandon says:

    Wow. Just…. wow. Really?

    First, you seem to not understand what the word "punish" means. Punishment is doled out by the legal system. It's a one time deal, and it's over. Denying someone the *priveledge* of performing at Michael Jackson's funeral is not a matter of "punishment", it's the Jackson family's (and the GMA's, and their advertisers') *RIGHT* to refuse to associate themselves with a dirtbag who beat the shit out of his girlfriend. Similary, it's my right as a consumer to change the channel when I see his mug on the TV and change the station when I hear his middling, auto-tuned voice on the radio (thought to be the "2nd coming" of the King of Pop?? Really? Who said this?? Thanks for the laugh).

    Second, you are equating sexual innuendo ("crotch snorkeling") with domestic violence, as though miming oral sex on television is somehow equal to beating the shit out of your girlfriend. News flash: it's not. Not even close.

    Here's the kicker: Chris Brown can continue to make shitty music, and y'all can continue to listen to it, and the rest of us can continue to think he is a vile piece of trash who makes really shitty music. Whether he is granted the priveledge of performing at an award show or not does not change any of that. It's not punishment, it's people with a sense of basic human decency exercising their right to not be associated with scum.

  56. Nikki says:

    Victim blaming, slut shaming, this whole thing is ridiculous.

    "Lately, it seems like we’re punishing the wrong person."

    Who do you suggest we punish? Rhianna?

    Chris Brown has shown no remorse for his actions. If anything in this debacle is a publicity stunt, it's his "apologies." He keeps saying things like, "I can't believe I did that" or "It was like I stepped out of my body." He's distancing himself from his own actions. And do you know what that screams? Repeat offender. Thank God the media is still bring attention to this, thank God Rhianna is still speaking out, thank God people still care. Maybe someone else will see the warning signs and maybe it will be one less causality of domestic violence.

    Someone said, "It's not like he killed someone." Every 1600 women will die at the hands of their partners. What if Rhianna had been one of them? Is that what it would take for people to take this seriously? That's really sad.

  57. Katlyn says:

    I don't understand your claim that Rihanna used this incident for her own benefit. What part of this whole thing did she plan? Are you saying she wanted to be beaten, or that she's so sly for actually TALKING about the fact that she was beaten? Some of the commenters on here seem to share your view that she's trying to gain something from this by talking about it.

    Some people are even saying that Rihanna should have just kept the incident between the two of them. REALLY?! I guess people have short term memory, because the media was all over this shit before Chris Brown or Rihanna even said one word about it. For months, every news site was talking about the details of the incident, the rumors, the picture of Rihanna, etc. waaaay before she ever talked about it herself. And now, when she actually comes forward, we're all going to get pissed off that she dares to speak about it? Anyone who figures this as a publicity stunt for Rihanna has some fuck up, faulty logic.

    Also, issuing a pre-written, rehearsed apology is not the most Chris Brown can do. For one, he can donate money to organizations and shelters that help battered women. That seems like a good step and it wouldn't even take any effort on his part.

    But in the end, if the public doesn't like Chris Brown anymore, that's tough shit. That's the price he pays for doing something so cruel in the public eye and I really don't feel sorry for him.

    Also, it's no surprise to me that most of the people sympathizing with CB on here are also saying shit about how Rihanna is partly to blame. That's very telling.

  58. owenlanders says:

    I can't take anyone who manages to misspell the name Britney Spears seriously as a commentator on pop culture.

  59. bleh says:

    "What you’re implying, however, is that I support his actions. I DO NOT."

    Claiming that the media is being mean to him and making a mistake by not supporting a domestic abuser is supporting a man deserving of nothing in this world.

  60. Chelsa says:

    I don’t see why the author can’t just own up and realize she made some egregious mistakes in this article. While her intent may not have been to victim-blame, it doesn’t change the fact that she did victim-blame (I won’t bother repeating it. Several commenters have already highlighted the problem spots).

    Some jewels:
    Both were seen together at Diddy’s house just days after the incident, yet, even after all of this, the media continued to berate only Brown – You’re right. We need to berate more victims of domestic abuse who stay with their partners. On TV. Because it totally helps them leave sooner.

    “If I didn’t have little girls looking up to me, I’d have stayed with him.” Uh, really? She can say that, but we can’t let Chris Brown perform on GMA? – Yes. She can say that. I’m shocked that you’d have a problem with her saying that. Many people leave abusive situations for reasons other than their own safety, such as the safety of their children. Whatever it takes for people to realize that leaving is a better option is a good enough reason!

    But let’s not forget, that because Rhianna has publically recognized that young women look up to her, that she must now be a chaste nun at all times. Don’t talk about sex. Don’t talk about food. Don’t talk about your future BF’s junk size. Least we turn all the little girlies (read: fans) with no brains of their own into wanton little sl*ts. Let’s remember: girls who have sex are BAD people!

    Maybe talking about other stuff (food, sex, man-junk), is her way of reminding herself that what happened to her does not define who she is. If she doesn’t talk about it –> I can’t believe what a bad person she is. If she does talk about –> She’s just milking it for a little more fame.

    Damn if you do, Rhianna… but really, shut up now. We don’t want to hear about DV anymore.

    To the people who say this would have blown over if it were just two average people. Well, you’re right. And that’s the problem! We shouldn’t just brush this off because the status quo is to ignore DV.

    Now, onto Chris:
    Yeah, that’s sucky that certain companies/distributors/chains are choosing to distance themselves from him. But they are private companies who have no obligation to carry a product if they don’t want to. So, no, I don’t feel bad that he beat the tar out of the woman he claims he loved and ruined his own image. Things I’ve learned about being in business: Your repuation can be what makes or breaks your enterprise, so it’s generally a good idea to watch your behavior. Sure people make mistakes… but other people make mistakes that ruin their careers all the time. I don’t see you writing OpEd pieces about forgiving them.

    And also, let’s not pretend he’s taken any kind of ownership for his actions. Until he can wear big-boy pants, and stop calling this “the incident”, I will continue to believe his apologies are pure BS and he doesn’t really feel that bad about what happened (to Rhianna… obviously he cares very much about how the fallout affected him). And I’m perfectly okay with the fact that I am judging him for his actions.

    Seriously though… don’t go on and on about how journalists need to just report what’s happened and use only facts, while liberally littering your piece with your opinion on the dynamics of the situation or your moral compass on how Rhianna uses her sexuality. Plus, comparing the hardship of Chris and Rhianna over this whole mess is apples and oranges. You should know better.

    Finally. Ugh: “Lately, it seems like we’re punishing the wrong person”? For god’s sake… at least apologize for that train-wreck of a sentence.

  61. Barefoot 'n Pra says:

    Lady, have you noticed that most people who support you are, like, talking in all-caps or in a language that resembles but is not quite English? And then they say things about how women should never talk about sex in public? Perhaps my comment would carry more weight if I closed it with "God Bless Somebody or Other"?

    You seem relatively cosmopolitan (relative, perhaps, to an inbred cannibal of Wes Craven lore), so if I were you I might take a moment to really consider whether or not I wanted to resign from blogging and write a crappy romance novel, or continue on to become the next Anne Coulter.

  62. Kim says:

    What has Rihanna's sex life to do with this?

  63. pia says:

    I'm able to forgive someone like Chris Brown because I have DV abusers as well as victims within my own extended family. I really think domestic violence is one of this things that as much as you say it will never happen to you…that you will never let yourself get that angry…you will never know until you are placed in the scenario and you have to train up your heart and mind to walk away from the situation.

    People have to understand that today's domestic violence is beyond the old stereotype of men who believe women are second class citizens that are to be controlled by violence. We have turned into a society where violence is acceptable against family members as well as the stranger on the street. We have to get back to the view of "I won't hurt you because I love you"…"I won't rob you because I love you and have respect for human life". Today's domestic violence, regardless of the sex of the perpetrator (Mary J. Blige was caught on camera slapping her husband in public–unacceptable still), is symptomatic of our personal struggle to see the humanity in each other. Now we have teens who don't know how to have healthy relationships because adults have done such a poor job exposing them to such.

    One of the most powerful quotes I ever heard was from Iyala Vanzant.."If you raise a child, you won't have to heal an adult".

  64. JS says:

    No, f*** this guy.

  65. Freddy Rabbit says:

    Um, no, just because you like his music is not a reason why people are obligated to give him concerts and not think he's an eternal a-hole, nor is it a reason why you have any right to insinuate that Rihanna is sleazily wheeling and dealing to profit from the abuse she suffered. Find another singer to like.

  66. CDM says:

    A kid 19yrs old who was exposed to domestic violence growing up in his house hold…no, it's not at all right that he did this, but this goes back to the PARENTS…parents make a huge impression on their kids lives and it's unfortunate that this is something that because he was so exposed to he has let it ruin his career. If he was not a kid I would say hell no a grown azz man does not deserve a second chance…he knows better. But CB is a kid he's go a lot of growing up to do. This was a terrible mistake but I think he can be forgiven and learn from him (kids mak mistakes and should learn from them,right???). But this is about each individual out there and no matter what people are going to feel one way or the other and likely stand firm to it. HE'S A KID PEOPLE!!!

  67. amanda says:

    he really doesn't seem sorry for what he did, and frankly, it's up to individual consumers to decide if they like him after they heard about the crime he committed. you don't see people dropping everything and embracing rapists and child molesters after they've 'served their time' or whatever.

    some people commit crimes that make them UNLIKEABLE.

    this is one of those crimes and one of those people. he seems like a d-bag, handled this like a d-bag, and the d-bag doesn't deserve my $$ or attention. gone.

  68. Sarah says:

    First of all, I would like to say I find Rihanna being a role model for young girls just hilarious. Her songs her more dark and even violent to a point and she claims to be a role model! And now all her interviews where she talks about things young girls really shouldnt hear; it just doesnt make sense.

    Now to Chris Brown. EVERYONE, I repeat EVERYONE, knows what he did was just plain wrong. We all agree with that. But is bashing this 20 yr old constantly really going to fix/solve anything? I dont believe that this article is victim blaming either. I think that the focus of this hate shouldnt be a young celebrity. The focus of all this should be abusers in general. If the people out there boycotting his album, cussing him out in public, cussing him out in comments on articles, etc., took all that energy and focused on the whole issue of domestic violence, it would be so much more productive. No one seems to understand that people attacking Chris Brown will NOT stop all the men who beat their wives/girlfriends on a daily basis! If Chris Brown ends up fading away, so will the issue of domestic violence. He apologized and I know that isnt enough for some people but their really isnt much else he can do. Both of them are trying to move on from this incident I think we should also just to help Rihanna. Im sure no one likes turning on the tv and listening to how they were brutally attacked constantly!

    I would just like to add that not only is a man hitting/beating a woman wrong, the opposite is just as wrong. Both of them are young, famous, and probably enjoy getting their way. They were arguing and it escalated to a point where both most likely put their hands on each other. Chris Brown stated in one interview that a man shouldnt put his hands on a woman and vice-versa. Hmmmm…. I wonder why? Both of them really need help with their anger. I wish them both well because they are both extremely talented and I would like to continue to hear their music.

  69. Jenell says:

    I'm about sick of it all also. During her interview with Diana I felt as though her body language and facial expressions were made up. I agree that she did her interview for cd sells also, if not WTF took her so long to do one. And don't say that she had to build up the courage, bullshit, she was making a c.d and doing Italy vogue while she was building up her courage and she could hav emade room. IDK about this topic here, but woman get abused everday (woman without fame and money) and judges or police officers don't go through the extremes that they did with Rihana to make awareness. No one reports it and for all these celebraties to come out and support Rihanna its like, come on what about the low income mom who's getting her ass whipped on the daily do they go looking for them to help them out of their situation… NO. Yes its time to leave Chris Brown alone god forbid any of u did something, would you like for your job or career to be taken from you after apologizing countless times.

  70. european says:

    haters took the opportunity to express their hatred.they were all jalous at the joung couple.jay z particulary is the corner ball .he was fucking rihanna between.he still pay some of the media to bash the kid.if shaq or 50 cent would have been in a relation with rihanna and did the same thing oprah would have never open her mouth.she help jay z out.but it's in the bible when somebody apologize he should receive acceptance.all the perpretators of chris gonna get their turn,wait and see .oprah already stop her show ,people get to know how fake she is.open your ears for rihanna and jay z.still a lot to come.if we human been knew about what could happen to us tomorrow we would not do the things we do .the sky is wild open and the LORD sees everything.i repaet myself.The LORD JESUS has forgive us for our wrong doing,why can t their forgive a 19 years old.this is sprituel rihanna won t be around for a long time you will see and jay z will have an grave accident

  71. Terri says:

    And why should his career be over…. Let’s take a walk down memory lane. First of all I don’t condone what he did or condone dommestic violence. Chris Brown at the age of 19 a kid, yes a kid… make a life changing decesion or mistake. One that for every day of his life he has had to live with, daily bashing from bloggers, media, ex-fans etc. There have been older artist that have made mistakes, Jay-Z in 1999 stabbed a fellow music producer, he went back anf forth to court for two years, in 2001 he was sentence to 3 years probation for the offense, settle a lawsuit with the victim between the amount of $500,000 to one million dollars, age of offense, 30, time of sentence 32, Jay-Z why going back and forth to court never stopped performing or making albums, he performed the very next night after his sentence. James Brown, was arrested time and time again for dv, his last arrest was 2004, two years before he passed away, he has a arena named after him in Augusta, Ga as well as a street. Terrnce Howard was also arrested and charged with dv, his ex-wife was his victim, this year at the Soul Train Music Awards he was one of the co-host. CSI: MIAMI actor Jonathan Togo was arrested and for felony domestic violence after a fight with his girlfriend, he was released on $50,000 bail.Don’t seen like it was something taken lightly, oh this happen this month and how many still watch CSI:Miami? Soul Train creator Don Corneilus age 72, Cornelius was found guilty on three counts; spousal battery, one of dissuading a witness from filing a police report and one count of assault with a deadly weapon. Don also has to attend a domestic violence course. I’m sure that was Don that I seen this year giving award away and his offense also happen this year. I could go on and on but, my point is the only difference with these men and Chris Brown is that no photo’s of their victims were leaked and sold to the media( TMZ) for profit.It’s time to let this young man move on with his life. We all have made some mistake at a young age that we wish never happen. Regardless of how most of us feel or for the ones that feel as though he should give it up, I feel and this is America and I have that right to my opinion that it would be a great lost to the music industry to lose him because I feel as he matures into adulthood he will have a lot to give.Also I wasn’t trying to bash the other celebrities, just trying to make a point were dv is concern. They all have move forward with their careers, Chris should be able to, he accepted his punishment. I hope that 2010 will be a healing year for all…

  72. Meg says:

    "My position is this: Chris Brown hit his girlfriend. Bad decision. The media blackballing him. An even badder decision."

    Condemning violent abusers is so much worse than domestic abuse itself?! Yikes. BTW, what Chris Brown did was not a "mistake", and likely not even an isolated incident. Abusers start on emotional abuse long before they start smacking their victims around. And IDK how things are in the United States, but where I'm from, we learn that hitting is wrong LONG before we hit 19.

  73. catherine says:

    I agree fully percent with the article. And i seriously think that everyone who has not forgiven him by now is a supid ass…

    You guys are only doing this to him because he's famous. I bet you if any of your relatives did that you would go easier on them.

    I'm i big fan of both but i really hate injustice and byassed people. And yeah he made a big mistake but he's suffered enough. And NEWS flash has anyone ever told you that grudges aren't nice. OUt of all the crimes in the world and you choose to bag on him. YOu weren't even there to see why and what happened for reals. He has great music and it should be heard. Oh and buisness and personal life is soo different. I bet there's even some of you out there worse than him. So people who are still hating are because they are mean, crewd people who don't know how to forgive. I'll always have both their backs when i see that there's something wrong.

    He's been punished enough and i know that if it had been anyone else they would have been forgiven. YOur only like this because of how big he was and how much you really liked him. And i'm for sure Rihanna would have wanted people to let him move on too because she said it herself live on t.v. He's done everything and apoligized and u can't except him to shoot himself for your forgiveness. So lay off already he's had enough. Also no, only dumb ass' think that buying his merchandise/ cd's is supporting violence because i'm sure he won't do it again after what happened!!!!

  74. Courtney says:

    I find it disgusting that people are saying Rihanna must have done something to provoke him, or that we "dont know the whole story". Here's the whole story: Chris Brown beat Rihanna. It's as simple as that. And beating your girlfriend (or anyone, for that matter) is a CRIME people. If Rihanna was supposedly beating Chris Brown up, where are the photos of him looking like he just went through a boxing match? He deserves everything he's getting right now. He hasn't given one sincere apology, he hasnt done anything to show he's changed. He won't even say "I hit my girlfriend" -he keeps saying he's being punished for "something he did". I will not forgive this man until he fully owns up to what he did and shows his remorse through volunteering in women's shelters and raising awareness about the awful issue of domestic abuse. In no way shape or form has he "paid his dues". Talent doesnt cancel out being a disgusting person.

    To all of you saying "he's just a human being, he makes mistakes", I find this insulting to all of us who dont beat our partners. Im a human being, but I know its not ok to kick the crap out of someone, not will it ever be. Domestic abuse will never end so long as we have people like all of you forgiving abusers because of lame reasons like "it was a mistake, it was so long ago, etc".

    Rihanna is a role model because of her decision to leave him; her bravery is amazing especially in the face of all of you who say she's a bad influence who should've stayed with him/is too "sexy" for young girls (there's nothing wrong with sex, people).

    Screw you, Chris Brown. And may you fall into obscurity like you whole-heartedly deserve.

  75. kidsavage says:

    Wow people still talking about this? it's over go live your life. 2009 is gone so is this. enough said about it. No one really cares anymore it happens. they both got dirty hands, he hit a girl, he's suffering . he will rise again she will fall once she can't use this as a crunch anymore. You reap what you sow. We'll see what they both reap in the future. God i aint know the world was so full of hate.

  76. joe right says:

    looks like some people need to be in a relationship with chris brown. someone once said and i paraphrase "Listen, and understand. chris brown is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead."

  77. Croxb says:

    so he made a mistake , we're all humans. We all make mistakes. We shouldn't keep him in the dark. It's time to let it all go!

  78. DOMINIQUE says:

    SERIOUSLY WOW …… you pepole are funny ….I agree with every one that says let it go ….there not to geather any more they have moved one ….chris brown how ever is still dealing with it i wish him all the best im going to continue to by his music …because the truth is he can sing his ass off and hes one hell of a dancer…yes he was wrong for hiting her true . he knows that… it happen last year …shes dating some one else im sure …. and hopefully he is to …and learning from his mistakes ….. now to get serious …i swear i thinks some of you people are becoming upsest with this ….really every web site i look at …i see chris brown damn get off his _______….check this though …the boy made a damn mistake that he can only keep apologizing for ,,,, and hes doing that if he could take it back im sure he would evey one treats him like hes not human news flash he is ,,,he just make music , its funny ….because ….no one may realizes this but ….. he has to answer to one person and one person only …and thats god ,,,and i promise you he for gives every one …..leave him alone find something better to talk about theres plenty …. look in the mirror at your self im sure every one on here incluiding the writer of this article have done some things we regret and is sorry for ..in cluding my self thats why i dont jump and point fingers and bash on pepole we all are far from perfect and thats one of the reasons why …so i hope and pray every one come to there senses and start suporting him

    PS for jason you wrote your message a whle a go …but hope fully you get on here and read this ….i would like to give you a peace of advice if jls is your group or a group you know …..bashing …and doging some one else to get to the top is not going to help you succeed it will only bring you futher down sorry

  79. brandi says:

    some of you are so fucking delusional its ridiculous. i wonder if your mother or sister or daughter was hit you'd be so quick to say "now now he's a good guy. let it go." i doubt it. chris brown lost a few record sells? big fucking deal. this girl could have lost her life.

  80. chels says:

    well, i dont really understand why people cant move on..

    i mean, he has apologized so many times and he HAS said that he takes full responsibility for his actions. Put yourself in his shoes. Sure you would be remorseful but what else could you do to that he hasnt already. Given, it was very wrong, but everyone has made mistakes and he is recieving help. Doesnt this show that he is remorseful? I think chris brown has more backbone than a lot of other people in this world that have made a major mistake.At least he has owned up to it and he has answered all your questions, faced all of the WORLD's abuse. one against the world isnt right. and you all call him the bully?

    I dont think people should be complaining and penalising chris anymore, i think you all need to focus on the fact that domestic abuse happens to a lot of people around the world and we need to help prevent it!

  81. Kiko says:

    ^ too long did not read

  82. Keesha says:

    You know what? When I had first heard about Chris Brown beating Rihanna, I was shocked. I couldn’t believe that Chris would do something like that. And when I saw the picture, I was even more shocked, because it was like it had actually set in what he had did to her. I am a huge fan of Chris Brown’s music, but at that point, it was so hard for me to listen to his music, so I went through a period of about a month where I didn’t listen to his music. But when I was listening to my ipod one day on shuffle, one of his songs came on and I realized how much I had missed listening to his music, because of the feeling I had gotten when I heard his song. It made me feel happy inside. I will admit that it was kind of awkward, but I went back and listened to his entire first album, and then I listened to his second album, and then I went on youtube and listened to his underground music, and I realized that I had always loved Chris Brown FOR HIS MUSIC. I absolutely hated what he did, and I always will, but I will not conform with what society is trying to tell me (“Oh you support domestic violence if you listen to Chris Brown.”, “Oh you must not understand how it feels to be in an abusive relationship.”, “I wish someone would beat your mother or sister, or even you so you could see how it feels. I bet you wouldn’t be so quick to forgive then.”, “Beating your girlfriend is unforgivable. He should NEVER be forgiven.”,”He has NEVER shown remorse for his actions.”, “How can you support a woman beater?”, “He deserves to have the media bash him.”, “He doesn’t deserve to have a career.”). And YES people most certainly have said or typed these things to me and it’s ridiculous. To me, it seems as if people are taking some of their life experiences and are using Chris Brown as a scapegoat for their problems. And although I understand that many people have been in abusive relationship and have seen their loved ones in abusive relationships, you CANNOT take out your anger and pain on Chris or his fans and expect your problems to go away, because they won’t. You also can’t expect good things to happen to you if you wish death or horrible things on people. I have read many comments from people saying that they wish that Chris would kill himself or that he would die and that it would put a smile on their faces. Seriously? I think that so many people who talk about, “Oh Chris is whinning about a few album sales, or he’s complaining that the radio isn’t playing his music” need to start talking about the people who are wishing death on Chris. I thought that we were supposed to hope that someone can get better and can change after something like this. And people wonder why many abusers never change. To be honest, with the attitude that our society has in regards to most abusers, I’m not suprised that many abusers don’t have the incentive to change, because so many people condemn them. “Oh once a woman beater, always a woman beater.” Really? Well, don’t complain or be suprised in ten years, when we still see statistics saying that only a small percentage of abusers are not repeat offenders of domestic violence.
    Now back to my story. To be honest, the reason why I still fight for Chris is not because I support his actions, it’s because I want to see him get better and I want to see him use his experiences to teach others. As far as his music, well if you took the time out to read what I had posted, then you know that I still listen to his music. I have also bought his new album, “Graffiti” and I really like it, although I wish he didn’t use autotune lol. But one last thing that I want to point out. I see some comments that people have towards Chris Brown, saying that he has placed blame for his actions on Oprah, stores not selling his albums, Rihanna (?), basically saying that he has never taken responsibility for his actions. I find this funny considering the fact that he said that very thing in an interview that I heard. I believe it was the one that he did on Big Boi’s morning radio show. Now, I don’t like the fact that he never said that he apologizes for beating Rihanna, which is in fact what he did, but he most definitely said that he takes responsibility for his actions and that they were unacceptable, so to be honest, I don’t understand what some people hear. I guess maybe when they see Chris Brown, they see their abuser, or their loved one’s abuser telling them that they will never hurt them again or something. I just wish that people could stop making Chris Brown out to be like “every other abuser” because he’s not. I wish that people could actually listen to or read HIS words, and not read or listen to what the media’s spin on his words are. And I also wish that people could stop thinking that a bad decision equals a bad person, because that is just so NOT true.

  83. SweetJesus says:

    To Keesha, and to other people who talked about the situation saying that we should consider the BIGGER scope of things… I agree. Also, Keesha, your post made me nearly cry. I agree completely.

  84. Terri says:

    Please, don't come claim that this article was unbiased or based on facts. You claimed that Rihanna was using the incident for publicity like you know her. You clearly have issues with her being a beautiful young woman that is not ashamed of her sexuality. And she is a woman, not a little girl. There's nothing wrong with a woman discussing her sexuality. Don't want little girls to read about it? Then do your job and be a parent. That is not Rihanna's responsibility. I would say more, but others have said what I wanted to say so much better than I could have. Stop blaming the victim.

  85. dequan says:

    Chris brown is a big jumbie saying sorry can’t take away her fear that someone else would hit her all her scars may dissapear but what can she do just forget about the fight well fuck chris brown his fans and all the other ppl who suck up to his shit he is just a solem bitch and no one can change that I personally used to idolise chris brown but now omg dats so fuckes up

  86. He is so cute, I would not leave him alone :-)

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