Sometimes I think we should just rename winter the season of love. When the cold weather comes in, it seems like couples just come out of the woodwork….or snowbanks. Suddenly they are holding hands in every store, making out on the sidewalks, and sharing kisses between sips of coffee at Starbucks.
Yes, it’s a little nauseating, but come on; everyone’s looking for a little love come holiday time.
But what makes a good love? A rugged jaw, some tight abs and some sparkling baby blues wouldn’t hurt, but when you get down to it, those are only an added bonus. The shiny gold bangle to your already perfect LBD. The truth is, there are way more important things every guy’s gotta have if he wants the honor of calling us his GF. And no, Pauly D, having a 25-minute daily hair regimen is not one of them.
So here are the 5 things we’re looking for when it comes to finding a boyf.
Makeout Skills:
Let’s be honest – no matter how much you love someone, no boyfriend can reach perfect status if there isn’t any chemistry, and chemistry simply can’t exist if the guy is sucking your nose off. Or licking your gums. Or drooling on your chin. A good boyfriend must have kissing mastered. And that means a variety, people. Sometimes we’re totally into a slow, romantic kiss, while other times we want to go at it like were in junior high and our parents could walk in any minute.
A Job
Of course the shallow reasons hold true; we can’t help it, we’re girls. When we decide to date just one guy, we want to know he can take us out to dinner and a movie every once in a while. We’re not asking for diamond rings, but a gift on Christmas and birthdays is pretty much necessary (call it superficial, but when Christmas rolls around again and all you get is another card, you won’t be happy). But beyond the material things, holding a job is usually a good sign of character. Chances are he’s up before noon, has a good work ethic and has a future beyond his mom’s couch.
A Sense of Humor
The physical attraction is only going to keep us interested for so long. Especially when he starts opting for cheeseburgers instead of trips to the gym and that 6-pack begins to soften up a bit. So there obviously has to be things about his personality that have us coming back for more. And while being compassionate or hardworking or loads of fun is important, more often than not it’s the guy with the good sense of humor that hooks us. We want someone who will make us laugh so hard we pee once in awhile. That’s normal, right?
An Equal Desire for Fun and Romance
There are some nights where we just want to get into our sweats and cuddle on the couch watching movies all night. But the next night we’re ready to slip into some heels and go out dancing. A good boyfriend also has this desire (to party…not slip into a pair of heels). We don’t want a boyfriend who wants to sit home all the time, but someone who is out every night of the week is no good either. It’s all about balance (and/or a mutual respect for all things Gaga).
Love for My Dog
Sorry, but before he came along my pooch was the one snuggling up next to me at night, sharing my dinner and watching TV curled up with on the couch. If you don’t love my dog as much as I do, it’s just not going to work out. Plus, a guy who doesn’t love animals is missing a piece of his heart… if he even has one.
What else do you guys think a good boyfriend must have?
brie says:
Mon, 21st Dec 20093:08 pm
a good (not creepy) relationship with his mom.
if he doesn’t treat the woman that gave birth to him
well, how is he going to treat you?
JSin says:
Mon, 21st Dec 20093:24 pm
I’m curious…if you could only have 1 of the 5 which one would you pick?
Zoe says:
Mon, 21st Dec 20096:53 pm
My list may be considered more idealistic but at least I know what I want
1) Honesty
2) Respect for my family and my beliefs
3) Good conversation
And that’s about it.
bessabariangirl says:
Mon, 21st Dec 20099:57 pm
Number one has to be able to match me in conversation – both listening and talking! And one who finds me funny who will laugh at my jokes – and whom I find funnY!
Equal Values – I’m a Christian and seriosuly to totally “get” me and whre I’m heading in life a keeper must share your faith
Music: Music is such a massive part of my life he has to at least passionately LISTEN to it!
Books: My boy read all the obscure book i did amazingly enough and it makes our relationship so much more fun swapping books and discussing them
Good family: sometimes this can’t be help but if he has a supportive and loving family he has learnt important character stuff
rachel says:
Tue, 22nd Dec 200912:01 am
charm
Kate says:
Tue, 22nd Dec 20092:38 am
Sharing the same basic morals and values as me.
mollination says:
Fri, 25th Dec 20094:03 pm
Wow – this is alarmingly spot on.
Passerby says:
Mon, 28th Dec 20098:00 pm
May be you can prepare a list for something a good boyfriend must not have. You can keep Tiger Woods in mind – while preparing that list.
Chloe says:
Tue, 29th Dec 20092:15 am
@ brie: i dont think how a boys relationship with his mom is, is the best indicator of his character. My boyfriend respects his mom, but doesn’t like her. But shes truly a terrifying women who’s incredibly stand offish and doesn’t trust her son at all.
I think if he did like her despite all of that, that would be a bigger indicator of a character issue.
dmo says:
Tue, 29th Dec 20092:18 am
I have a top 4 list…
1. He has to be ambitious/have goals. It’s a sign that he’s not lazy, and can have a passion for something in life.
2. He has to be a genuinely nice person – not just nice to me, but nice to the guy pumping his gas or the waitress when we go out. I can’t stand people who aren’t respectful of others and can’t put themselves in someone else’s shoes.
3. He has to be smarter than me. I want to feel like he can help me expand as a person. If I have a question, he can answer it, and I can learn from him. That being said, ideally we are both smart at different things. I learn new things from my current boyfriend all of the time, and him from me as well.
4. He has to be taller than me. I’m allowed to have one physical prerequisite.
steph says:
Thu, 31st Dec 20093:06 am
chole, i feel ya, my bf has a horrible relationship with his mom but respects her throughout everything, although her priorities are all out of place doesnt work yet critisizes everything and expects everything, he shares the same morals and aspects of life as I and my parents are totally different than his. Bottom line his mom is pretty wack :/
Beth says:
Sat, 2nd Jan 20107:31 am
He must my Pet TickleMe Plant I am growing in my dorm. It loves affection. The leaves instantly close and even the branches droop when you Tickle It! Found it here…see the video
This is real and a great Valentines Day Gift!
Beth says:
Sat, 2nd Jan 20107:32 am
Here is the link to grow your own TickleMe Plant indoors year round. http://www.ticklemeplant.com
chrissy says:
Sun, 3rd Jan 201011:04 pm
I think all guys want to get in our pants and don’t want to hear what we have to said .
A guy says:
Tue, 23rd Feb 20103:23 pm
You girls want this and that and have entire lists of what a good boyfriend should have. My question is: are you going to be a perfect girlfriend ? Are you going to fulfill most of his desires ? Just think, you ask for all this but what/how much can you give back ? Answer honestly.
Jen says:
Sat, 27th Feb 201012:45 pm
To “A Guy” – no one is “perfect” (i hate that word)…guy or girl. I’m pickin’ up what your puttin’ down though…honestly I don’t really have a ‘list’. Obviously there are certain good/bad qualities I avoid…but to be honest the best guys I’ve met usually have been great surprises out of nowhere. Once you ditch the ‘list’ good things come along. I say, trust your gut. You’ll know if he’s good or bad and you won’t need a list to do it.
Jeffrey says:
Sat, 27th Feb 20107:31 pm
Boy do we live in a PRINCESS world! What I expect him to do for me, me , me, it’s all about me or he’s not worthy of being my boyfriend. One relationship expert did a study on over 1000 men and women. The women listed over 300 things they expected out of a man to be considered worthy of a relationship. Men listed less than 10. I think women are being influenced by the culture of these magazines and internet sites and what they should demand out of a man. Stop being so critical with all these lists and expectations! It’s making relationships impossible.
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