The Weekly Ten: 2009 in the News

Every week I make a list. Not a grocery list or a to-do list…or that list, because I don’t really do groceries (there is a reason why they deliver pizza) and to-do lists are totally not my scene (if such a scene even exists) and, unfortunately, I haven’t added to that list in quite awhile.

No, this list is a top ten-style countdown about the hard-hitting issues, like which mash-ups are the best ever or which apps rock my world.

This week, as we round out 2009, I’ve picked out our favorite media-buzz worthy events of the year. Keep in mind that this list will include a lot more cheating and Ed Hardy than Healthcare reform and economic crashes. (Sorry Madoff, I’m just not that into you).

10. Letterman Gets “Creepy” With His Staff
And somehow still comes out looking like the man for fessing up. Undesirable actions, admirable apology. Take note…

9. Tiger Woods
He’s changing his name to “Cheetah.”

8. Lady Gaga Takeover
As the year progressed, so did the world’s love for Gaga. Opening up the year with “Poker Face” and “Just Dance,” Gaga inspired many Halloween costumes, a rediscovered love for good pop music and rounded out the year with the inspired and wacky “Bad Romance.”

7. Chris Brown/Rihanna Debacle
From the horrific picture, to the Jet-skiing in Miami, to the interviews to the blue bowtie, Chris Brown is forever immortalized as an abusive, disgusting a-hole. Let’s not give this douche bag a comeback, please.

6. Swine Flu
I can’t believe I’m going to one day look back on Swine Flu as a serious “epidemic” that captivated the world and brought out those useless paper masks. Luckily, we were able to make them fashionable.

5. Jon Gosselin Gets Douchier, World Gets Dumber
Forget about Swine Flu, Gosselin was the biggest pig of the year. I am so looking forward to 2010 where hopefully the media doesn’t concern themselves with what type of menthol cigarettes this a-hole father went and bought at the local 7-11 in his spanking new bedazzled Ed Hardy shirt. Woof.

4. Obama’s Peace Prize
Seriously, why was this news? Slash, why did he get this award, again? Which brings us to another important, undeserved award…

“3. Yo, Taylor. I’m Really Happy For You, and Imma Let You Finish…”
But this had to have been the most unnecessary overplayed story OF ALL TIME. Also, cut my boy Kanye a break.

2. Balloon Boy
The most riveting moment of television this year involved watching an empty balloon fly around for two hours.

1. RIP: Everyone in Hollywood
Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Brittany Murphy, Natasha Richardson. You name ‘em, they bit it this year. Heaven got a little more Beverly Hills glamour after this year.