Every four years we count down the days until the Olympics when we can watch the world’s most talented athletes compete for the gold in all of our favorite sports. You know… curling, skeleton, and tug-of-war (yes, it was actually once an Olympic sport). OK so maybe they’re not our favorite sports…. and maybe we hear nothing about them all year until the Olympics… and then maybe we spend the whole time trying to figure out what is going on. (“Isn’t that just really fast sledding!?”)
Yeah, that’s about right.
We all know that 90% of the Olympic sports are pretty random, so what are the requirements for a sport to be admitted? Requires strength? Athletic ability? Spandex? Stamina? If that’s the case, then how’s this for a proposal: pole dancing.
The future for pole dancing in the Olympics is probably not right around the corner, but believers are already starting to lobby for it to become one. Ridiculous you say? More ridiculous than Biathlon? I mean, take away the pole and isn’t it almost the same thing as gymnastics?
Let’s look at the pros and cons of adding this “sport” to the Big Games.
CON: It’s pole dancing! The sport of the strippers! Do we really want people who are paid to take their clothes off representing our country?
PRO: Clothed or nipple tasseled, anyone who has tried pole dancing knows that it is extremely difficult. It requires an insane amount of practice, strength, and flexibility. And it’s 2010 – pole dancing has been taken out of the dark, smoky strip clubs and has turned into a widely accepted form of exercise and fun activity.
CON: How would the event even be scored? By the speed at which clothes are removed? “Candy (USA) scored a 10 with her record breaking time: She managed to tear her entire outfit off in 2.6 seconds!!” Would stiletto height be considered in reference to level of difficulty? What about acrylic length?
PRO: Just think of the commentating! “Representing Team USA, Luscious! Luscious has been honing her craft since she was 17. She always dreamed of big things, but never imagined she’d end up on this world stage. ”
CON: It’s degrading to women, duh.
PRO: Male pole dancers. Yum.
CON: It’s not really the most wholesome “sport,” and the Olympics really are a family event.
PRO: If ever there were something to increase viewership (besides Michael Phelps, that is), Pole Dancing is definitely it.
So, what do you think? Should Pole Dancing be considered an Olympic sport?