8 Tried and True Ways to Get Famous Fast

I am sure a little part of all of us wanted to be famous at one point in our lives.  A little piece of my heart wants to sing on American Idol, design a dress for an Olympian figure skater (kudos, Vera Wang), or get insulted by Kanye West on live television.  Whichever way you put it, being famous does not seem that bad…but the getting there is tough.  Unless you are Justin Bieber whose ‘getting there’ involved a YouTube video and a cute haircut. Needless to say I am impressed.

But besides YouTube, there are other ways you can become famous in lightning bolt fashion. If you long to walk red carpets, get chased by paparazzi and rub elbows with Hollywood’s A-listers, take a little advice from these fameballs on how to get real famous, real fast.

Get Fat (Kirsti Alley, Kevin Federline)
It’s been a long time since the woman who found fame on Cheers and later stole my heart in Look Who’s Talking (one of my favorite adolescent movies out there) was the topic of pop culture conversation. That is until she got fat. Then skinny. Then graced the tabloid covers once again grasping a donut and looking into the camera lens with 10 double chins. And now Kirstie’s showing up on Oprah, starting her own weight loss line (??) and starring in, Kirstie Alley’s Big Life, a reality show about her quest to lose weight. Again.

Sex Tape (Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, etc.)
If I have learned anything about Hollywood it is that a sex tape is worth more than a little extra passion with your boy toy. It’s the easiest, fastest and most fun way to rise to the top of the fame scale. Just look at Kim Kardashian. One day she’s getting down and dirty with Ray J and now she’s on the cover of nearly every magazine, has a TV show, a perfume, a clothing line, millions of dollars in endorsement deals and even gets paid to Tweet.

Sleep with the biggest d-bag in America (Heidi Montag, 15 Tiger Woods Mistresses, Jessica Simpson)
…Or marrying the biggest D-bag in America works too (in Kate Gosselin and Heidi Montag’s case). Regardless, sleeping with super big douche bags has clearly secured many a spot in US Weekly week after week after week. In addition to TV deals (Rachel Uchitel scored a reporting gig on “Extra!”), book deals (do we even have to mention that “book” Speidi wrote?), and an advice column (Ashley Dupre).

Have 100 kids (Kate Gosselin, OctoMom)
If you want to be famous, pop out a small litter. These women did, and now we can’t turn on the TV or read a magazine without seeing their post-baby bodies. Kate Gosselin had her own reality show on TLC, wrote multiple books and is now set to Dance with the Stars, which, obviously, means she is one. And Octomom? Nadya Suleman has been on the cover of People, appeared on NBC with Ann Curry and Dr. Phil, and even had her own two-hour special on Fox. Thankfully she turned down the offers to star in porn.

Be a good singer…who happens to be really ugly (Susan Boyle)
There are millions of good singers out there, so if you really want to make it you gotta set yourself apart. The easiest way? Look like Mrs. Doubtfire. It worked for Susan Boyle, who went from homely old British lady to having the best selling album in the world in 2009.

Two words: fist pump (Cast of Jersey Shore)
Want to go to the Grammys and get paid to party? All you gotta do is play up some stereotypes, spend your days tanning/doing your hair and you’ll be on the cover of Harper’s Bazaar in no time.

Say something REALLY stupid (Caitlin Upton)
“Uh, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps, and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq everywhere like, such as and I believe that they should…” Yeah, we laughed (and cried a little bit) then, but Caitlin Upton is laughing all the way to the bank now. Since that infamous day, Caitlin has appeared at MTV’s VMAs, been on TLC’s King of the Crown, and is currently competing with her boyfriend on The Amazing Race. [Editor’s Note: She even got an interview with our hero, Chelsea Handler. Sigh.]

Be an incredible actress plucked from obscurity (Gabby Sidibe)
Obviously not as easy as the others, but there is still a little integrity left in finding fame and if anyone proves that it’s Gabby Sidibe. This incredibly talented woman made her debut on 2009’s Precious and is now up for an Academy Award for Best Actress. My hat is off to you, Gabby.



    1. Erich says:

      Famous might be fun for a min. But if you listen to what T.I. has to say,

      "For my name up in lights and multi-million record sales

      I done gave up my life, can't get a moment to myself

      When alone I ask myself, is it worth it? I ain't perfect

      Neither is anybody else, but I think my kids deserve

      To be with Daddy out in public without all the interruptions"

      Would it really be worth it? Would it be worth everyone always knowing what you are doing? You couldnt do most of the daily stuff you do now, like go to the grocery store. Or worse if you went out to a bar and you left with someone, the whole world would know. No thanks, I like my privacy.

      1. jttr says:

        i think fame is everything. I would kill to be famous and its sad but true..

      2. Eilyse says:

        thats cool and stuff that u like ur privacy but i would love to be famous

    2. Hannah says:

      I think being famous would be great, however it would take great responsibility and hard work to get there. EVen once your there, you will have to have great courage to stand up in front of crowds. Once your famous, it's almost impossible to get out, and there will be a point in your career that if your famous, you WILL have to talk to crowds of poeple, weather it's a small group, or herds of poeple. You also have to have "the talent" they are looking for, so not only will you have to be recongized and seen you have to have what it takes to be bold ad loud and have the talent.

    3. morgan says:

      i think being famous would be the best thing thats happend to anyone although you do hafto have the courage and the talent but if i was famous id give it all ive got and i am a pretty good singer

    4. K-twizzle says:

      See I wanna be famous.. and I sing and dance.. but I just cant seem to record myself doing it.. I have too much fright.

      1. Jordan says:

        Hey Im The Same I Wanna Be Famous But I Cant Dance:/ But I Can Sing Contact Me Please mpkyouth@aol.com Il Aprichiate It

    5. Erin says:

      I would really love to be famous, it has been my life long dream.. I live to act I’ve been part of the theatre in my home town. My family say that Im born to be famous.:)

    6. Stephenie says:

      Beyonce is to me fake I mean no one has like tits that big and natural at the same time… Am I famous yet? O.o Sike naa beyonce Is beautiful and I love her so much like every song Is a masterpiece and the vocals whooo she is amazing in everyway big nor small.:) plus nice boobies…

    7. claire says:

      I think maybe people dont realise what they got in life to they lose it…. privacy….. u no what…. beain famous is cos u want money and to have fun at same time….well i fink fame kills people early cos u dont see many artists still around when there 90+ get a self employed job be your own boss and make ur own money that way…and youl still get were u want in life i wouldnt mind easy money but then who wouldnt

    8. claire says:

      got to add though…. theres one person i hate in fame and would NEVER want to be that is Rihanna…Sleezy i think get some respect i think…if i was famous on stage id be flaunting fully dressed so people would wanna no what i got no actually no wha i got….i want my partners feeling like there the only one who gets me naked not the whole world! BUT JESSIE J IS ANOTHER STORY SHES AMAZING!!!
      I gotta make money to get her at my hen night one day!!! love that girl and i hope the best for her

      1. none of ur bis punk says:


      2. StarryID says:

        You mean you want Jessie J to get you naked? Isn't she a ladyboy (albeit a talented one)?:)

    9. NGL says:

      Whoever commented here needs to take a fucking grammar class as well as learn how to spell.

      Much love,

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    11. matiaya burgess says:

      Hi. I always wanted to be in the world of fame by inspiring different people whoever lost their love ones, to not think this the end of the journey for noone, truley I think its the beginning because it inspire you to become a better and stronger person in life. If Yall think this is a good way to put me in the world of fame 8433595993 call anytime

    12. cutie says:

      Ever since i was four i watched hannah montana and i would say that is gonna be me someday and now im 11 turning12soon and me and my friends sound great when we sing together and they are boys and love to sing just like me but i am now determined to put a video on youtube and call as many record labels as possible and tell them tp watch the video but i am determined to one day be up on stage with my friends singing

    13. cutie says:

      Me again so i told my friends and theytotally yelled at me and said it was stupid i am so mad at them

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    15. Eilyse says:

      i want to sing and dance im auditioning for american idol because im a great singer and its fun i love dancing but what if im not good enough what if i dont get enough votes what if im not gonna be who i want to be!!

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