Single. And Leaning on My Friends

I was studying for my Calc midterm with one of my sorority sisters last night, and like good students (hey, we were studying on a Thursday night, cut us some slack) we were soon off the topic of derivatives and onto to the topic of boys. Anna and I were trying to figure out the strange tapestry of relationships that make up our lives, venting that life would be a hell of a lot easier if there were less gray areas in relationships and more “Okay, we are officially exclusively dating” talks.

By Emmy

You know, your typical late night girl talk.

When I finally packed up my books and left the library, the conversation stuck with me. Anna, who is currently single and never really dated anyone in high school, was telling me about how she had never understood all of the things that some girls put up with to be in a relationship.  “I just don’t understand why such amazing girls settle for some losers. There is nothing scary about being single until the right person comes along.”

Now, obviously, there are lots of great guys out there that she was not referring to. And, obviously, a lot of girls out there are single and enjoying it. Yet, Anna really made me think, and I realized that when I first got out of my crazy long-term relationship, it took months before I would let people call me single. Months! I was so scared of the term, of what it implied and of actually being single. Now I realize that Anna is right – that there is nothing bad about being single and nothing missing, either.

The things that I got used to doing with a boyfriend, the things that I really missed, were the habits of having someone so involved in your everyday life. I liked the routine of having someone to vent to when I was having an awful day, of always having a partner for beer pong, of always having someone to study with or watch The Office with. And what I realized last night when Anna explained to me (in short simple words that even my exhausted caffeinated midterm-ed brain could understand) was that you don’t need a boyfriend to do all those things; you’ve got plenty of people around you who can do all that already.

And that’s something that I feel silly for not realizing earlier!

So today’s post is a little bit of a reminder to single (or even not so single) girls everywhere to take a minute to appreciate your friends, all of them. When you don’t have a boyfriend, you have opportunities to build closer relationships with other people. You can make a new friend your beer pong partner, or vent to your best girl (girls are just WAY more sympathetic anyway), or even watch The Office with your floor in the lounge.

Whatever it is, here is my little toast to friends and relationships of all kinds that help us get through the day. I know it’s cheesy, but in my brain that is delirious from midterms, I am so grateful to all of the amazing friends that keep me and other single girls around the world sane.

So this weekend, raise a glass (or two… or four…) and toast the amazing friends who are there when you need it most. I’ll definitely be raising a few to Anna who helped me remember the important things I do have in my life, as opposed to the other things that I do not.