Sexy Time: Rules of the Rebound

You think breakups are hard? Try rebound sex. That little activity is more difficult to navigate than an overcrowded frat party in a dark, smelly basement. Sometimes a rebound is just what we need to get out of the habit of spontaneously crying/checking our ex’s Facebook 800 times a day. Other times, rebounds just pile even more heartbreak on top of an already-difficult situation.

Here are some ground rules for having a fun and successful rebound fling.

Don’t expect to fall in love. When you’ve just gotten out of an intense relationship, it can be tempting to look for your next true love. Don’t. Rebound sex can help you get back in the game, but it’s not going to replace your ex. Expecting anything more than casual fun sets you up for another heartache.

Don’t deny your emotions. You shouldn’t be looking for your next great love right away, but that doesn’t mean you should be ignoring any emotions you have. Your first time having sex with someone new is bound to bring up some emotions. It’s better to acknowledge and deal with these, good and bad, than to deny them completely. Trust me, they always make their way to the surface eventually… and it’s super awkward when “eventually” is “while you’re on top and start crying onto his chest.”

Don’t settle. Don’t hop into bed with the next man you meet just because you’re anxious to get back out there or, worse, you think that’s the answer to all your problems. Wait for someone you actually want to be with, or you’ll end up regretting it in the daylight.

Don’t compare to your ex. At least, not out loud. But really, it’s not going to be the same. It takes time and effort to get to the comfort level most couples reach. Rebound flings don’t usually make it that far, and that’s okay.

Use protection. This is especially important if you weren’t using condoms because your last relationship was monogamous. You won’t know your next partner’s history nearly as well as you knew your ex’s. Go pick up some condoms, now!