Before I graduated high school, my friends and I had an ongoing joke about the college life. More specifically, we would semi-kid about the drunken “lesbian experience” that the crazy nights of college parties would inevitably bring. As it turns out, many of my ideas about college life that I learned from Van Wilder and American Pie movies aren’t quite accurate. I don’t wake up in the morning and have a beer for breakfast, I’ve never woken up naked next to someone I don’t know (yet… only kidding!), and I don’t live solely off of KD and hot dogs (although I would like to). But I did prove the one stereotype correct – I did have that drunken “lesbian experience”, and to my surprise, I really liked it.
Sorry CollegeCandy readers, but I’m not sharing details. All I can say is it was a fun night that involved a lot of alcohol and a we-really-hope-she’s-sleeping roommate situation. Good times. Anyways, while this was something I was hoping to cross off of my bucket list, I never really realized that I was actually interested in women. Did this make me a lesbian? Was I bisexual? Pansexual? Bi-curious? The labels didn’t really matter to me. I just accepted that I like what I like, and that’s okay.
If you allow me to make some broad generalizations, here are my favorite and least favorite things about being with both guys and girls:
Guys: I know a couple guys who are just a little obsessed with the size of their penis.
Girls: I have never in my life heard a girl talk about how she wishes she had a bigger vagina.
Guys: finish, and they’re out of commission for a good 20 minutes to an hour, depending on the dude. Of course, there are other things they can do for you… but does anyone ever really do that? In my experience, when he’s done, the sex is typically done as well. This has always been okay with me, but then I realize that…
Girls: can keep going and going and going and going. I’m actually curious about that — how does girl-on-girl sex actually end? Could we just set a mutual quota of 10 or so orgasms per sack session? Sounds kinda nice actually.
Guys: There’s always that worry in the back of your mind as to whether or not a guy is comparing you to something unattainable – something he saw in a magazine. I’m hot and all, but I’m no Kate Moss. I don’t know how many women’s bodies he’s seen, and I don’t know what he expects to see when he looks at mine.
Girls: To be honest, it’s not often I see a girl who is truly unattractive. I find all women beautiful. But at the same time, it’s kind of nice to see that the girl I’m naked with has cellulite on her legs — just like me, or she gets rolls when she bends over — just like me, and she’s still completely gorgeous (just like me?). It kind of gives you a sense of feeling normal about your imperfections.
Girls: studies show that up to 50% of women fake orgasms. How do I know when I’m doing it right!?
Guys: after sex with a guy, you KNOW you did a good job. There’s um… evidence.
Girls: get PMS. I know because I get it too. How exactly would sex work between two hormonal women? I predict fighting, passionate make-up sex, and then maybe a little post-coital crying. I’m not being sexist, I’ve actually (embarrassingly) been there.
Guys: will never, ever get PMS. Lucky bastards.
Guys: Penis = awesome.
Girls: Vagina = awesome.
See my problem here?
The truth is that there are pros and cons with getting busy with both sexes. There’s a lot to learn from different experiences, and I would totally encourage anyone who’s a little curious about exploring their sexuality with someone of the same sex to go for it. Seriously, if you can find the right person, it’s a good time. And if it ends up not being your cup of tea, at least you can say you tried!
Do you have any same-sex experiences? Please feel free to share! What advice would you have for someone exploring his or her new-found love for the same sex?