Sexy Time: Why Size DOESN’T Matter

I seem to be on a roll with the truth telling lately. First it was semen myths, and then it was the things we believe about sex before we start actually having it. This week is going to be short and sweet (because I’m exhausted from my summer job. Why did no one warn me it was going to be so awful?); I’m going to tackle why size doesn’t matter.

So listen up. Maybe it’s time we all stop hating on the little guys, K?

The top two-thirds of the vagina has no nerve endings. Really. We only have a couple of inches that can feel what’s going on (that’s why you can’t feel a properly inserted tampon). If you’re only going to be feeling 3 inches, what difference would a 5-inch penis or a 9-inch penis make?

“It’s not the size of the boat…” Plenty of well-endowed men have no skill (trust.), and many men with smaller equipment know the right things to do. It’s not fair to generalize either way, really. There are plenty of men who are larger who think that just because they’re big they don’t need to try – well, that’s not the case (trust). And many men who are aware and possibly self-conscious of their smaller penises will try extra-hard to make it that much better (trust). Everyone is different, it’s not just size that determines a good sexual partner (amen).

A big penis is more likely to hurt you than an average sized one. Ripping, tearing and general discomfort are more likely the bigger you go. If you are with a guy who’s on the bigger side – use lube, and lots of it.

As I’ve mentioned before, most women don’t orgasm through intercourse alone. Clitoral stimulation is what does it for most ladies, and the size of his member doesn’t really matter much when he’s going down on you. Smaller guys still have tongues, fingers, and forearms, so unless you can’t orgasm unless your partner is 8 inches or larger and you can only finish during intercourse, there’s no reason a smaller guy can’t do as well (if not better) than a guy who is more well endowed.

And that’s the end of that one.
Smaller guys, you can thank me later.

Related ItemsGuys Love orgasm Sex Sex Education


  1. Lucy says:

    Fuck a guy with a tiny dick and one with a bigger one and there will be no doubt in your mind which one is better. (Hint: it's the bigger one.)

    Seriously, I know we're trying to boost guys' egos and everything but seriously…I do not want a small penis. I don't want an Amazoneon one either. Average or above average is definetely the best. I don't think men need their egos flattered any more than they do now anyway.

  2. Dave says:

    Oh dear, Lucy ever thought u might have a gapping gina, so don't go flattering yourself either.I agree with the article about not generalizing, its about finding the right partner

  3. Lacey says:

    Its really not about length. Its about width. Skinny dicks really dont do anything but poke. Wide dicks actually rub up where its needed. So, the size myth is only half true (in my opinion)

  4. Lucy says:

    Oh dear, Dave, ever think that you might be insulting me as an overcompensation for your inadequacies? Perhaps that's why a male happened to click on a female website link of "why size doesn't matter". Hmmm.

    Yes, my vagina is one big gaping cave, thank you for your concern.

    Width probably is more of a concern than length too.

    1. JM1025 says:

      So, evidently, is your brain.

  5. mannequin says:

    This is so stupid. Yes, size does matter.

    Stop trying to placate teeny weeny weenies.

  6. oopsyies says:

    just found your site on

  7. Sarah says:

    My current boyfriend is definitely smaller than my ex, but he satisfies me so much more than my ex did!

  8. Dave says:

    @Lucy….your observation (assumption) of my tinchy member is extraordinary.Sorry to hear about your gapping cave, my most heartfelt sympathies for your dilema

  9. male30483 says:

    Why is it you always hear about the size of a man's dick but almost never anyone says anything about the size of a girl's pussy?

    Maybe it is because many people (men and women) still wrongly believe that it is up to the man to give pleasure to the woman, and that the penis is the be-all-end-all when it comes to sex.

    Hell, if Maxim or wrote articles about vagina size, how to test your woman's vagina size, how to find the smallest vagina, etc. I bet you girls would react the same sort of way men do when girls make comments about dick size.

    That said, I disagree with this article generalizing the sex skills of the men that different sized dicks go with. There are good lays and bad lays no matter what the dick size.

    Fuck a guy with a tiny dick and one with a bigger one and there will be no doubt in your mind which one is better. (Hint: it’s the bigger one.)

    Plus, what's with all the hating on men and their dicks here?

    "Seriously, I know we’re trying to boost guys’ egos and everything but seriously…"

    "This is so stupid. Yes, size does matter.

    Stop trying to placate teeny weeny weenies."

    If there was an article about girls with small breasts being sexy, or an article written buy a boy who likes small breasts, would you say they were placating itty bitty titties? (For the record, I like all sorts of breast sizes in case anyone would think to use boob-arguments against me)

  10. male30483 says:

    Whoops I put in that fifth paragraph in the wrong place

  11. male30483 says:

    Question for Ness: What are the biggest and smallest dicks you've actually been with?

  12. inbedwithmarriedwome says:

    I think it doesn't matter, but I'm surprised how many of my female friends DO care about it. Whether or not they actually are physically enjoying a larger one more, they think they are, so it sort of doesn't matter–it still gives an edge to the more endowed.


    In Bed With Married Women

  13. Ness says:

    @ Male20483: I don't take a ruler to my partners.

  14. Ness says:

    Also, @Male20483: "That said, I disagree with this article generalizing the sex skills of the men that different sized dicks go with. There are good lays and bad lays no matter what the dick size."

    I never made that generalization in my article. I actually agree with what you're saying here… it was the commenters that were making generalizations. ;)

  15. M says:

    it's not the size of the boat it's the motion of the ocean

  16. jimmy says:

    well I am hung male. My question is why do women ?want a guy with a big package all the some of the women I been with said it hurts but after that they want more? what is that?

  17. jimmy says:

    last note I love making holes gap wide open

  18. mamamojo says:

    male30483 – did you just write, "IF there were are articles about girls with small breasts…?! Fool, there are zillions of articles and stupid APPLE PIE frat boy road trip movies about women and the size of their breasts. If I had a penny for every one of them, I could rich now. Get a grip and grab a BIG D_ _ K, quick, 'cuz you don't have a clue. Sorry, but size does count. Not only physically but mentally. It's much harder to mentally aroused and maintain it for a small penis. But I do agree with the sentiment that they are some pretty non-screwing people out there of all sizes. I chalk up to watching too much porn, which stereotypes sexplay for men and women. The roto rooter, hardcore pounding attempts just don't cut it when compared to a lover who really has taken the time to learn how your particular body works. They know how to switch up quickly and try something different besides the same three moves that seemed to drive their last girl wild. Also women, we do us ALL A DISFAVOR by FAKING THE FUN and overcompensating for lackluster lovers instead of sharing our real suggestions in a well-timed, non-critical way… STOP FAKING THOSE WACK PORNO MOANS when the d– is not up to par. That will make it a lot easier for the next one… lol

  19. male30483 says:

    Could someone translate mamamojo's comment into English please

  20. ingrid says:

    believe me I have had large and small and everything in between, and I will take someone on the small side any day of the week and twice on sunday, the best sex I have ever had in my life was with the two men with the smallest packages. believe me they try harder, they take the time and energy to learn their way around a woman and both of them could make me orgasm from another zip code with no hands or toys involved just from hearing their voices and thinking about the outrageously hot sex. The big ones were always like "I'm hard, hop on…" sadly this describes my husband to a t. big pee pee, zero interest in pleasing me.

  21. male30483 says:

    Just for the record, I enjoy quite the diverse selection of breasts or dicks

    *twiddles moustache*

  22. will1272 says:

    There are four things women want in a man.




    4. OR a total loser.

    So by definition #3 makes this article a lie.

  23. nane says:

    My boyfriend have a nice size its not to big and not to small, but more on the small size.

    And im going to be honest its the best sex I ever had!!!!.

    I would never have sex with a dude who can't even fit half of his penis in me.

    Having sex with him can't lie it hurts I don't know if its me or if its the way he puts it down…… but honest girls don't need a big penis, we just want to say our man have one and tell our girlfriends how big it is.

  24. […] Candy: Size doesn’t matter (stay tuned next week for the exact same article on why it […]

  25. Lyn says:

    I've been with two guys in my entire sex life. My first boyfriend was on the smaller side, and he wasen't very talented or anything.(He was a virgin before we got together) After about a year, we broke up. My second boyfriend (Also a virgin) is much larger than my first, and he can pleasure me much better than the first one, and he can do much more and better than my first. Honestly, though, I think it just depends on the guy and their experiences.

  26. Lyn says:

    BTW, my second boyfriend watched a LOT of porn, so he knew alot of things he could do, while the first never really bothered with anything sexual.

  27. […] anyway. The question is, does it really count for that much in the real world? Some of us have already weighed in on this age old issue, but all it takes is one look at the comments to see that we’re still a […]

  28. Blanquita says:

    Size does not matter, if you think it does…..than you are not picking the right guys to have sex with. The most amazing sexual experiences that I have had was the guy with an average sized penis. He LISTENED, we COMMUNICATED, and we had some of the most amazing sex ever. I have been with men that are huge and while it may be fun for a little bit, I personally like to be screwed really hard and fast, and the bigger penis hurt. So, size does not matter, if it really is all that matters to you….something is not being done right.

  29. Gingee says:

    You are mistaken. There are nerve endings deep in the vagina.

    Size matters. Give it a go with a fella who is micro-man, and then try it with a fella who is at least a 6 incher. The difference is amazing. The bigger penis makes you feel "filled up" and can touch nerves you never knew existed.

    1. Medical Doctor says:

      That's a crock, Gingee. You may think you have nerve endings you never knew existed, but you don't; not unless you're a freak. You may not realize it, but doctors who do your PAP smear scrape you in the distal regions of the vaginal barrel and on your cervix hard enough to make you bleed (so they are sure to get enough cells to see if they are cancerous) and yet you never feel a thing, let alone any pain ex post facto. If you need to feel "filled up" to have a good time, perhaps that's more psychological than physiological. If your vaginal tract is five inches deep and you are with a man who has a ten incher, a lot is going to waste as unusable. More importantly, it's not the stretching that renders pleasure, it's the friction, and even that is not the only source of pleasure. If you are with somebody you truly love and enjoy, then just being that close is also a source of pleasure along with the notion that you have given him pleasure, too. In that scenario, the whole experience is more fulfilling than you'll have with a one night stand.

  30. anne says:

    i know size does matter but the fact is even the small ones can get it on if they know wat they are doing in the bed.

    the vagina will respond to any stimuli that is attempted there so stop making the small guys feel bad about theselves. btw i love the big ones

  31. […] no big deal and you’re totally normal-sized, you’re always secretly wondering if you measure up to women’s expectations. And the truth is that most women believe that it’s the motion of the ocean and not the size […]

  32. Mitch says:

    Notice how not a single women chimed in about the size of their vagina's. In my experience it has been very rare that a women any muscular control of their vag. I as a male was supposed to supply all the toolage. Hey girls, 95% of the time your vags are lose. From a normal sized guy.

  33. kev says:

    I'm average sized and do well, so I've been told over the years. But honestly, there is a huge disparity in vaginae out there! For some it hurts, for others its loose. A good fit is important, but at some point in life you realize it's 90% in the mind. I now pity people who just talk about sex like they are nothing but animals. Nothing compares to real love-making and commitment. As long as certain minimums are met, the size of your parts becomes a mere footnote.

  34. appleaday says:

    Let’s not forget that for women, a lot of the turn-on is in the brain and has very little to do with “the equipment”. Many women can get aroused just by fantasizing. And sometimes it’s the look in a man’s eyes during sex that can send me over the edge.

  35. McFatWang says:

    Ok. Let’s dispel the myths of above, from a REAL 8×6, right here, right now. Do women like hung men (meaning, not the 99.9% of internet men, but those of us who DO measure up, that PROVE it daily)?

    Answer- Yes. Yes they do. Otherwise, I would never have sex, dummy! (I am ignoring the closet lesbians in here of course)

    “The top 2/3’rds of a Vag has no nerve endings”…and that means, what exactly? Ahhhh… must be “science”, so magically, a bigger cock like mine somehow is the exact same as a smaller one. Try again, Doctor Barbie. While it may not contain the nerve endings, women DO feel it (pressure and compression= orgasm)…therefore, bigger IS better. Otherwise, genius, my girth would have ZERO effect, and not be one of the TOP REQUESTED THINGS women love to have (“The Stretch”).

    “Plenty of well-endowed men have no skill”…this is how I know INSTANTLY you have never had sex with one. The women that say this, do so, because of a few reasons. They erroneously think that this much —-> = 14”. I know this because they NEVER measure a cock, and therefore, wouldn’t ever KNOW how big a big one really is! You can’t do the BS cheat like most women do, and say, “But he LOOKED big” or “He told me he was 10”! FUCKING MORONS. In reality, women and men both are completely delusional….if you have never had one, HOW exactly would YOU know “bigger isn’t better” and that hung men have no skill? YOU wouldn’t, you have never HAD one!

    Another common sense point- The worst sex you will have come from average men trying to make up for the lack of, NOT from me, as I don’t have to work nearly as hard to get the same result. DUH. (Another reason I know you haven’t had one.)

    Did I point out that only average men do the pr0n sex women complain about? Just beating up a pussy, with ZERO skill? Hey genius..I CAN’T do that to a woman, it is common sense it would hurt her. Therefore, I MUST be good at what I do, unlike average men!

    “A big penis is more likely to hurt you than an average sized one.”- Another check in the category for you of never having had one. THIS is truth- I know my cock-size, unlike YOU, and therefore, having owned it and used it EXTENSIVELY, unlike YOU, a man DOES get good with the equipment at hand, AND HOW TO USE IT SO IT DOESN’T DESTROY OR KILL THE VAG IN QUESTION.
    I am LITERALLY as wide as a $20 bill, a TV remote control, or a pack of Marlboros. In other words, I have figured out (actually, the first time I ever had sex) how to fuck without hurting, and letting her enjoy it. Jesus…you don’t get out much do you? Slow and Steady win the Race, and I HAVE done this WAY the fuck more than you.

    “As I’ve mentioned before, most women don’t orgasm through intercourse alone.”- Bullshit, and exactly why women like hung men. Not counting the overall psychological aspects of this, I can automatically tell you have never had a big one, on JUST this statement alone. The reason is easy- Length AND Girth. And the girth does the trick, every time. Hitting bottom on a girl IS painful UNLESS she wants it! Pain IS pleasure depending upon the overall situation, person and circumstance.
    I would expect this statement from a Dock Martin Lesbian, but NOT from a truly experienced female who rocks the big REAL cocks.

    Final Nail, in your Cock Coffin-
    I will prove something here and now, so any ladies (and the delusional men making claims) will ask another female who HAS had one how nice it was, and what they liked about it.

    I am 8×6. A 2001 Lifestyles Survey (found over on Mr. shows the statistics of sizes in the male population. Thank you, Ladies, I rank 1 out of 30,000, or 5% of the population (taking my length and girth into account).

    So ANY of you claiming you had one larger than I ever had, or ANY man sitting here claiming they have one bigger….the cock is on the table- PROVE IT. I do, all the time. That is ALSO how I know you haven’t had one, lady.

    Do you know WHY you boneheads have never had a REAL 9″. Or a REAL 10″ (much less me)- Because a TRUE 9″ will be close to 1 in 100,000. A 10″… about 1 in about 1-1.5 MILLION.

    So lady, if you are going to talk about cocks, at least have enough sense to measure him up, before you spout shit with ZERO mathematical or statistical validity…..


    1. Haha says:

      tl;dr = u mad.

  36. Paul Luzi says:

    excellent luck being you

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  39. joe says:


    lollerskates. Dude how does 6in circumference make you as wide as a dollar bill? Is your joint flat or something? 8×6 ain't that big chief. I will award you the above average notion, but you are talking like you are swinging around a baseball bat lmao. Btw at 8×6 you are beaten by a lot of dildoes..

  40. a young man on the i says:

    Isn’t it interesting how this part of sex (like with most parts) revolves around the man? Not many people seem to say that a vagina is too big or too small. If she can’t feel anything or if she’s in pain, then clearly if the penis was a different size she wouldn’t complain so much.

    What if you flipped that around. Instead, you could easily put blame on her vagina. If her vagina was a different size, there wouldn’t be any complaints!

    Really, it’s stupid to put so much blame or credit on the man. I hate that most people (especially women) have not figured this out yet.

  41. […] • Great news…size doesn’t matter […]

  42. Bri says:

    I lost my virginity (and slept with for 2 YEARS) a 10 1/2 inch ****. The sex was NOT good, it hurt, and I never came remotely close to orgasm. Fast forward 3 years later, I've had many-a-sex partner, and I've never had more amazing sex than with the guy I'm with right now. He has like, 6 1/2 inches. I've NEVER had an orgasm from sex alone until him. Girls AND guys, let me tell you, it makes no difference what his size is. If he knows what he can do with it, then you're okay. I love love LOVE the **** I getting right now, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

  43. Dexter says:

    You morons, its not even about finding a different partner. What you have to do is work on the situation. Most of her pleasure is allowed or disallowed by her psyche. If she is disgusted by someone or threatened, then it doesn’t matter how big or skilled they are, fact is, SHE AIN’T TURNED ON!!! I have to go into details to finish. First communication, find out which position is her favorite, how deep she wants it , what angle she likes, how to read her body. Second is intimacy! Closeness,feeling, oneness, laughter these are important! Third is comfort, letting her feel good in her skin, even lying to her telling her shes a goddess if thats what it takes just get her comfortable. Id say size is about 20% of it. The rest depends on how u use body &MIND!! Apply the technique differently according to the size . PS I’m 8×6 it aint that uncommon like you may think

  44. Dexter says:

    No easy breaks its just like everything else in life; work hard to get better

  45. T-macc says:

    I hate how certain women who use sex as an everyday hobbie and don’t go cold turkey for at least a year with no toys or anything at the least six months the nymphomaniacs are always the first to judge but if you screwing king Kong he’s going to make space for a home theater in her box so of course it will be hard to please a woman who gets served more than ten times with ten different guys in one month is too much I think the stable women and the bat caves need to separate opinions pornos are a horrible way to look for skills on sex unless they are sex training basing your satisfaction off of actors who only please the camera for a better paycheck is delusion and no disrespect to any woman only sluts focus on size constantly it has to be deeper than that for me I have to get in her mind and her soul she has to be clean enough to lick every hole her conversation has to be not boring as fuck its so much more complex than just size if your the type of woman who can’t be satisfied with one man for a long time you need to get your mind right sympathy for pathetic guys but if you can’t close up shop on the goodies for at least six months your p**** is raunchy and you need to shut your mouth and sing up for horse man porn auditions some women get off way too easy with this judgemental crap and the roses in their garden smell like shhhhhh if

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  48. Peter says:

    Think about this: Women complains about men got small manhoods, why cant we men start to complain about that womens got small womanhood? It is fair right?

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