One Month Challenge: Facing My Fears, Week 4

[Everyone’s got a vice, a bad habit, something they know they need to change. Unfortunately, everyone also has a million excuses why they just can’t do it. Not anymore. Every month we will be following a different CollegeCandy writer as she takes on a personal challenge. This month we’re following Jill as she gets out of that boring box of hers and starts facing some fears. She killed a spider, she sang some karaoke, and she confronted authority. And now it’s time for her final challenge.

By Jill

I’ve never been a fan of roller coasters. Or water slides.
Or heights.
Or rides at the fair.
And in my 25 years of life, I’ve never – not even once, not even for a half a second – been on a Ferris Wheel. True story.

I was the girl who waited in line with my friends then held all their sh*t while they went on the ride. Three times.
I was the girl who made up excuses why I couldn’t spend the weekend at Six Flags.
I was also the girl who suddenly had to go to the bathroom when my family wanted to go on Splash Mountain at Disney. (My mom finally bribed me to go on the ride saying she would buy me a new pair of shoes if I didn’t have fun. I cried the whole time, proclaimed it was child abuse for forcing me to go on, and got a new pair of shoes.)

But this month is all about facing fears and face fears I did, my friends. I took a baby step and went on the Ferris Wheel at the infamous Navy Pier in Chicago.

I went with my four-year-old nephew and fifteen-year-old cousin, both who were anything but scared. In fact, my nephew looked bored. I, on the other hand, was shaking at first. Did you know the thing keeps moving as you get on and off??? I sure as hell didn’t!

But I will say this: I realized there really is nothing to be scared about! It was pretty, it was slow and it was fun!! I can’t believe I waited 25 years for THIS. So not scary and, really, sort of a let down after all that waiting…and shaking….and imagining the worst case scenario (me plummeting to my death).

And after a month of challenging myself, I think that’s what I learned most. I tend to get so in my head and build things up so much that I’m afraid to do them. But when I muster up the courage (and have a very heated internal conversation with myself…totally normal, right?) and actually face my fears, it’s all really nothing. Granted, I won’t be jumping out of a plane any time soon and I probably will never again get on a rollercoaster (my mom stopped bribing me with shoes a long time ago), but I will definitely be more open to new ideas and activities.

It might not be much to some people, but killing a spider, confronting my boss and getting on a (GIANT) Ferris wheel made me realize that I’m a lot stronger than I thought I was. And I may still shake and sweat and throw up a little in my mouth first, but after this one-month challenge I now know I can handle anything.