Coupled. And Saying Goodbye (For Now)

July 29, 2010     Posted in Advice, Relationships

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By Kari

Does anyone else find it highly disturbing that it’s not even August and the networks are rolling out the “Back to School” specials and commercials? Maybe I’m just in denial, maybe I want summer to stretch on forever, but it definitely seems too soon to head back to school.

Unfortunately, I’d be wrong. Next week I have to head back up to school a few weeks early to enter the wonderful world of sorority recruitment (another post in its entirety).  Don’t get me wrong, I’m so looking forward to catching up with all my sisters about their summers. I can’t wait to watch Pretty Little Liars with running commentary from my 2 wittiest friends. And I’m sure as hell excited to raid their closets for all the great new clothes they bought for the new semester.

But, resuming my estrogen laden lifestyle means saying so long to a certain boyfriend of mine. I get so sad knowing that in a few short days I won’t be coming home to the man I love, our little home, and quiet, peaceful snuggle sessions. I’m dreading knowing that the only guy I’ll be sleeping with is my teddy bear (not that my twin size bed could fit David even if he were allowed to sleep at the house). And I am absolutely depressed that the only action I’ll be getting on a consistent basis will be with my vibrator.

I’m def not looking forward to getting back into the swing of an LDR …or the 6 hour trips home every other weekend (if I’m lucky).  But, I learned some stuff this summer (whaddya know!) and especially writing this column, so I figured I’d share my Favorite Coupled Lessons Learned.

1. Living together means double the laundry…and I’m most likely going to be the one doing it. Especially after David tried to help with it…and shrunk all of my workout gear.

2. Finding TV shows that you both love = relationship bliss. Mostly.

3. Don’t be over-confident about your crock pot skills. Leaving it on high all day will only result in bad things. Which reminds me- it’s not the end of the world if you f*ck up dinner.

4. Keep the sex dirty, and the fights clean. Even in our worst fights, I always realized that our relationship was worth fighting for…and we usually made up within the hour. And then had really hot, really dirty sex.

5. No matter what, always take time to realize how lucky you are. I found out that putting pen to paper (finger to keyboard?) and sharing with the most fabulous readers in the world why I was so in love made me fall even harder for David. And if I ever start to take him for granted, I know how important it is to stop and reflect on what a great other half he is.

Thank you guys  for sticking with me through the good, the bad and the strange.  I’ll be on hiatus (at least until December), but I can’t wait to hear your Coupled moments and stories. Keep sharing the love (just not with your single friends-they probably don’t want to hear about it).

4 Comments on "Coupled. And Saying Goodbye (For Now)"
  1. Christopher says:
    Thu, 29th Jul 20106:45 pm 

    Quality post–the thing I identified most with was the Long Twin Bed reference/link. It can be a real struggle sharing one of those comfortably.

    Another couple lesson: realize that both of you need time apart. It's not that two people don't want to see each other but you need time with the same sex too. Sounds strange but I find the best relationships are ones where you understand the difference between wanting to see each other and being attached at the hip.

  2. dani says:
    Thu, 29th Jul 20107:13 pm 

    the only thing worse than what you're describing is going through pre-rush and rush knowing there's no boy waiting anxiously to see you once you're done with all the work, so feel lucky.

  3. Kari-Florida State says:
    Fri, 30th Jul 20108:39 am 

    Great advice Christopher, thank you!

    LOL @Dani. Oh the joys of recruitment. Good luck and have fun : )

  4. Jer says:
    Sun, 8th Aug 20106:09 pm 

    I recently went through a LDR, I say recently, but truth be known we are still in one, it just doesn’t seem AS bad. Daniel and I have been apart for one year, 900 miles away to be exact. Having a relationship over the phone, skype, and texting is not the kind of relationship I would have wanted. However, flying back and forth once a month and seeing him for the first time out just out of the terminal was the best thing of my life. My heart pounded and I started breathing harder…and when we saw each other it was all perfect…the 4 days that we had together one weekend out of the month seemed to be just hours…It was a different life for us, we had been together for two years at the same school, and in our third year he transferred far far away ( in my world). I was mad and hurt, but the truth is, I knew it was the best for our relationship and our future…we both knew that this is what was best for his career…. We took the leap and life took its course. It's almost 4 yrs now, and I love him more than life itself. Distance makes the heart grow fonder, and makes you realize that the swollen eyes from crying every night (ok not every night) but crying on the phone because your heart aches for him…is so worth the plane landing. Not to say that we didn’t have our ups and downs, we deff. experienced those!!! But we learned to not sulk at home, but go out, it helps with the wait. We now have had the best summer of our life…All I did was go to school, I’m talking about 3 semesters of school during the summer…and all he did was work. We didn't go anywhere, we didn’t do anything, but the best summer of our life is him moving closer. We will now be 90 miles apart!!! Although we are still apart, 90 miles is nothing compared to 900 miles. So here's to fellow LDR's YOU CAN DO THIS, IT NOT EASY TO SAY THE LEAST, BUT YOU WILL KNOW THAT YOU KNOW IF HE/ SHE IS THE ONE. Distance does make the heart grow fonder…it makes you fonder of the little annoying things that he does..it brings LOVE..and what’s better than being IN LOVE.

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