Single. The Downsides

August 20, 2010 4:00 pm     Posted in Relationships  Emmy g+ page


By Emmy

As much as I love being single (and I promise I do. I mean not THAT much has changed since last week), I do have to acknowledge that there are a few aspects of being single that suck. Do they outweigh the greatness that comes with having a bed all to yourself or not shaving for weeks at a time? Maybe not, but there are loads of little things that make the single girl’s life less than perfect.

1. Unreachables.
Whether it’s sunscreen for a day at the beach, aloe after a sunscreen-less day at the beach, or just lotion for those scaly days of winter, no boyfriend = no way to reach your back. And that equals sleeping on your stomach for a week as you wait anxiously for that crispy skin to peel.

2. Moving.
It’s a lot harder to find someone to help with the heavy lifting when there’s no guaranteed nookie in it for him.

3. Sick Days.
See #2, but replace “heavy lifting” with “bring me a bowl of soup.”

4. Crappy Days.
See #2, but replace “heavy lifting” with “bring me cookie dough.”

5. Creative Dates. Or not.
Living in Chicago, the amount of creative dates that can be found are more or less unlimited. With new Groupon and Living Social deals, I am always seeing some really cool opportunities at a steep discount that would be make for great date adventures….if there was someone to go with. Yeah, I could go with my girlfriends, but something about a midnight sailboat cruise to watch the Navy Pier fireworks just doesn’t seem as fun when there’s no one to snuggle with.

6. Sunday Nights.
No matter how content I am with my single status, come Sunday night I couldn’t be less happy. I don’t know what it is, but Sundays just make me want to cuddle.

7. Explaining.
I don’t know why people feel this is an appropriate thing to ask girls that they barely know. It happens all the time to me… I’ll be home for a break, and run into parents of a friend of a friend at the grocery store. So I’ll be talking to the mother of this person I barely know, and she’ll ask me how college is going, and oh yes, do I have a boyfriend now? I hate when people seem to think that being in a relationship is necessary for me to be viewed as a successful college woman or that my relationship status defines me.

8. Creepers.
Walking into a bar with no man on your arm is like an open invitation for creepers to creep all creepy on you. And it’s not the end of the world to do the whole “I’ve got a boyfriend,” but I hate having to lie, even to random strangers. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I give my number out like free t-shirts during freshman move-in week, but I’d rather avoid the “Hey baby, come here often?” if I can.

What do you hate most about being a single lady?

35 Comments on "Single. The Downsides"

  1. han says:
    Fri, 20th Aug 201011:23 am 

    Sunday Nights…you are SO RIGHT. They are depressing without a man

  2. CR says:
    Fri, 20th Aug 20102:15 pm 

    I would way rather sit in a living room with my best friends discussing everything that happened over the weekend than cuddle with a boyfriend…… personally.

  3. Lo says:
    Fri, 20th Aug 20104:41 pm 

    Sunday nights FOR SURE!!!! the other things… I'm content with doing alone.

  4. Lauren says:
    Fri, 20th Aug 20106:00 pm 

    Sunday nights bother me the most because every girl with a boyfriend has to post their Facebook statuses about how they're watching True Blood or their Sunday night shows and snuggling with their boyfriends..I get so jealous! I want that

  5. julia says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 20107:41 am 

    ok, while a lot of this is true..its not this kind of attitude thats gonna get us single girls anywhere!! how about you post a list of 7 GREAT things about being single i mean i think that'd make me feel better then reading these going yes, yes, yes, alone alone alone. or articles on how TO get a boyfriend..always helpufl i guess

  6. Julia says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 201012:50 pm 

    Sunday? No! For me it’s Saturday.

    I’m always either too tired, doing homework, or dreading the week ahead to want cuddling.

  7. P. says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 201012:27 pm 

    Watch True Blood Sundays with girlfriends and marvel at Eric! Duh.

  8. misnomer says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 20102:24 pm 

    With number 7 may also come "Why not?" I actually was asked that question once when I said I didn't have a boyfriend. How exactly are you suposed to answer that when?

    http://studentswhostillhavesouls.blogspot.com

  9. Ann says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 20102:27 pm 

    1-4 could be done by a servant, since it sounds like that's what you want from a boyfriend.

  10. Naema says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 20105:10 pm 

    lolll @Ann!!!

    no but really, number 7 is the biggest issue of the list. and ESPECIALLY when u've been single for the past 21 years…depressing!!

  11. Danielle says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 20106:25 pm 

    @ Naema, I'm in the exact same boat. And I HATE when people either show sympathy or say something along the lines of "Oh, well that's okay." Grr…

  12. Megan says:
    Sat, 21st Aug 20108:19 pm 

    I miss going on dates but I'm pretty content with everything else. My last boyfriend and I went to movies all the time. Now, I probably go to a movie once every 3-6 months!

  13. gaby says:
    Mon, 23rd Aug 20106:28 am 

    For me it's Friday nights when everyone is busy except for me.

  14. Jenelle says:
    Mon, 23rd Aug 20104:15 pm 

    I'm usually good at dealing with bugs. I just saw a Palmetto bug (i.e. cockroach) crawl across my screened-in deck… Please someone come kill this bug!!!

  15. girlsgameshot says:
    Mon, 23rd Aug 201010:47 pm 

    as a single , i often walk on the street,music , reading , thinking ,shopping,eating ,by myself . it's good . from kissing games.

  16. Chrissy says:
    Tue, 24th Aug 20107:17 am 

    well Ladies, I have to say going to a bar without a man on your arm, even if you have one…somewhere else, is asking for creepers. Once you get to the safety net of "I have a boyfriend" (which often times doesn't flow into conversation), they don't believe you. They continue to creep.

  17. Cheryl Jordan says:
    Tue, 24th Aug 20107:33 am 

    Being single is wonderful, it's something to get use to but you can get use to it. It's more fun to date than get serious with someone and have to be dependant emotionally on a man .I don't have to live in anyones shadow and everyday is my own adventure. You just have to think positive and more so when it is the Holiday season.

  18. GoodWitch13 says:
    Tue, 24th Aug 201010:58 am 

    Being single is nice, but I miss getting kisses and man-hugs.

    @P. I am completely with you on the whole marveling at Eric from True Blood. <|:)

  19. Kim says:
    Tue, 24th Aug 20103:51 pm 

    I don't mind being single until I'm the only one of my friends sitting on the couch watching TV alone and everyone else is out on a fun/romantic date. Or when my roomies bring their bf's over and cuddle with them on the couch while I'm in the room…

  20. Sarah says:
    Wed, 25th Aug 201011:36 am 

    As someone who has been on both sides of the spectrum, both are spectacular and I mean that honestly. I absolutely loved being single, I loved all of the time spent with my girl friends and not once did I feel anything less than loved and cared for by them. Being single for the first 21 years gave me a chance to really get to know who I am and what I want.

    For the past year or so I've been in a very serious relationship, which is fantastic as well. I think one of the benefits of being single for so long (and happy about it) meant that I found someone who I knew was compatible and I knew that I wouldn't settle. In the end, having a boyfriend is great, and I can say that I'm just as happy as I was when I was single, its just different. In the end, there are real benefits to singledom and real benefits to being in a relationship. I also think that since we're so young, its quite important to experience both sides of the coin, especially being single (because how else can you effectively learn to love yourself?)

  21. Katie says:
    Wed, 25th Aug 20104:05 pm 

    Hey girl I am single and may be biased, but I love being single. Especially when I see my friends with their boyfriends/boy-it’s complicated-friend and end up losing a sense of who they are. Plus I feel that having a serious boyfriend in your college years in unnecessary unless you are looking to marry that person. As for the “unreachable,” all you have to do is ask a friend to put some aloe on your back or roommate, just the other day I was at the beach and got a really bad sunburn on my back and just had my roommate help me out. As for moving, well yes a guy would be nice to help you out-it’s always nice to have that strong extra help-however your not always going to have a man by your side and you need to learn to do things on your own. Plus some really cute guy may come walking by and see you having trouble and offer to help you. Which is always a bonus. “Sick or crappy days,” well that’s what best friends are for. Date nights, I have too seen places where they could be a good idea for a date, but instead of feeling sorry for yourself just write that place down for the next time you meet someone and he will be impressed that you didn’t leave it ALL up to him to find a cool and interesting place for your date. Everyone is different when it comes to Sunday nights, I hate them just as the next person but personally I like those nights to myself, to catch up on some homework, reorganizing my closet or just relaxing; however everyone is different. I do agree with you 100% when it comes to explaining why your single, I hate it when relatives or friends ask me why I don’t have a boyfriend. But I have learned instead of getting frustrated, I take it as a compliment; they are surprised because you obviously are beautiful and have a lot going for you. So who wouldn’t want to be with you? CREEPERS, CREEPERS, CREEPERS, are all over college campuses whether they are a student or not. It’s annoying, especially when you go to a school on the west coast. That’s why you have good guy friends to take to the bar with you, just in case you are having trouble getting rid of a weirdo. But all in all, being single is great; I love the freedom especially as a college student because we are just beginning to find ourselves and being independent on our own with out our parents. A lot of girls get into relationships in college and then end up regretting it later on, because they missed out on a lot. This is the time to be single and enjoy being you!

  22. kat says:
    Wed, 25th Aug 20103:57 pm 

    what really really sucks about being single, is when suddenly all of ur friends decided 2 fall in love and they're always hanging out with their bfs…

  23. Jane says:
    Thu, 26th Aug 20109:09 am 

    1. There's a lotion applicator on a long wooden stick that you can buy at BB&B. 2. Hire those big brawny men, but make sure it's a hot day so they take their shirts off. 3. Why do you want someone to see a bunch of used kleenex on the floor (i.e. when Harry met Sally). 4. Wine. 5. Keep a list for when you're not single. The Navy Pier isn't going anywhere. 6. See #4, but add a good book. 7. Ask – why do you ask? Always throws them off and it's a good way to say none of your business. OR, just say oh, his name is Nunya. Nunya Business. 8. I have no answer for this one . . . creepers will be creepers.

  24. Jenny says:
    Thu, 2nd Sep 20106:12 pm 

    Worst thing about being single for me? No sex.

  25. sushantanayak says:
    Thu, 2nd Sep 201010:38 pm 

    Nice Article

  26. George says:
    Sat, 4th Sep 201011:01 am 

    I don't know how I wandered into this article, but I feel like responding. I'm not sure if this is about yourself or just an article, so I will generalize.

    This sounds like the typical single girl that has gotten out of a long relationship. You can't really decide whether single is all that great, because you miss xxxxx. Ladies if you're constantly battling the two balances, instead of figuring out ways to cope you should realize you probably want a relationship.

    You don't want to turn into Jane over here, drinking wine every night in the She-Woman Man Haters Club, baking "I don't need a man" cookies and sobbing over sleepless in Seattle.

    Watch tough love on VH1.

    … And to rant a little:

    Your in a bar, recently single, attractive, and you seem approachable. SURPRISE men are in the bar and are looking for U! Please don't turn every guy which you weren't looking at first into a creep. Don't be so defensive, open up a bit – or say I'm flattered but not interested. I digress.

  27. The Academic says:
    Wed, 8th Sep 20106:42 am 

    Alexander Skarsgard from True Blood keeps me warm (or is it cold?) on Sunday nights.

    Other than that, I feel like I have too much going on to worry about being single.

    :/

  28. Jessica says:
    Wed, 15th Sep 20107:52 am 

    Scrambling to find a date to bring to a wedding!!!! So complicated!

  29. Karis says:
    Sun, 19th Sep 20106:46 pm 

    I would have liked this article more if you had said something like "The Ups and Downs of Being Single" and then had eight positives and eight negatives. Because I'm single right now and I have been for a while and I really wish you had written the positive sides to being single, because I love it (although I also loved having a boyfriend, too)

    Maybe you can write a sequel article… "Single. The Upsides."

    Just a thought =)

  30. Chris says:
    Sun, 17th Oct 201010:30 pm 

    # 7 is soooo true. It irritates me.

  31. Morgan says:
    Mon, 4th Jul 20115:10 am 

    creepers to creep all creepy on you. hahaha I busted out laughing to this one

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