Real Life Happens Offline

September 1, 2010 12:00 pm     Posted in Reality  Colleen Leahey, Reporter g+ page


By Colleen Leahey, Reporter

At the bar this past weekend, I saw a flash go off in the corner of my eye. A group of seniors lovingly grouped together to document their last first-night out in college. Moments later, as they began to separate from their completely posed positions, I heard a backwards-hat clad boy shout to the cameraman, “Tag me, bro!”

This scene is absurdly common. In fact, I am relatively shocked if only one “OMG… DETAG!” reverberates through my ears a night. The aforementioned seniors, and everyone with an Internet connection or cell service, were so busy documenting the moment that it’s extremely plausible to ponder: were they actually living in it?

Between Twitter, Facebook, BBM profiles and statuses, etc., citizens of the world are constantly connected at all times.

“I just got my first kiss!! ilu Johnny <3” popped up on my Facebook Newsfeed the other day.  The user was 14. (Perhaps the real issue is why am I FB friends with a 14 year-old…). That same evening, a friend was doing a bar crawl in DC and Foursquared his whereabouts half-hourly.

Sure, these examples could all be deemed as a total overshare of information, causing you to suddenly unfollow their Tweets or “hide” their actions on your Newsfeed. But, let’s be honest, they are far from uncommon.

As a society, we have become obsessed with sharing our lives via social media outlets. It’s almost as if a something didn’t happen if it wasn’t documented on the Internet.

Rather than focusing on the now, conversing with friends, and even meeting new people, we focus on how our night will look tomorrow. It’s become so much about marketing ourselves to our peers, albeit at the lowest of levels, that it can be difficult to discern the difference between genuine and contrived fun. Hell, it’s hard to actually have actual fun.

“Smile for the camera!” might as well be “Smile for your future profile pic!” We take pictures in order to post them on our websites. To get our friends to “like” them and leave comments. Sure, sometimes it’s appropriate – like when you’re on vacation or studying abroad. But, the picture of the Dirty Corona you downed at the waterfront bar the other day? Telling everyone your whearabouts every second of the day?Or the posed shot of you and your girlfriends sharing a shark bowl? What’s the point? How is anyone actually enjoying that moment (and that potent cocktail) when their main focus is documenting it for others to see?

There’s nothing wrong with sharing experiences and memories with your friends, but there is a big difference between sharing experiences and completely missing out them because you’re so consumed with sharing them.

Yes, social media is a great way to stay on top of our friends’ (and friends of friends of friends’) lives, but its time to start actually living ours. To get offline and focus on the here and now. To explore, to hang out with friends you otherwise wouldn’t, to simply notice your surroundings in a whole new light. To enjoy what you’re doing with the people you’re doing it with. You’ll rid yourself of an exorbitant amount of distractions and find yourself enjoying the actual situation, not just how it will appear on Facebook in a few hours.

My roommate and I tried this yesterday. We ended up biking to the local pool and cooled off on the 95° day. As she doubled me on the handlebars of her shiny red cruiser across the bumpy cobblestones of Georgetown’s back streets, we looked absolutely hysterical. Me, holding on for dear life. She, pedaling as hard as she could so we didn’t suddenly topple over. Did we tweet, take a picture, or update our status to share our fun with the world? No. But it happened, we had fun and it’s probably been my favorite memory so far this year.

What do you think? Are you living in the now… or in the tomorrow?

18 Comments on "Real Life Happens Offline"

  1. .... says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 20107:45 am 

    haha well you did just document it.. so….

  2. karen says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 20108:12 am 

    yup. thats why i have no facebook.

  3. Carmen de Carmen says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 20109:46 am 

    Hm…interesting viewpoint.

    I must admit, there are times I take a pic and yell 'Aw! This is so goin on facebook!' (alright, not those exact words, but you get the point…)–but then again, who doesn't? Even mothers and aunts taking pictures of their kids say/think 'Oh, just wait till so-and-so sees these!' while taking pics. Are they not living in the moment? Is that moment in time being all-consumed with how so-and-so will perceive that moment in time? I think not. Like we of the facebooking-twittering generation, I think they're just excited and want to share. Nobody's planning their life around how a night out will look to others…not anyone I know, anyway…

    Just because the medium by which we choose to share pictures and memories these days has changed (and is incredibly faster than it used to be) doesn't make the act of planning to share them inherently bad.

    I totally agree with you about overshare, though. I have seen too many people break-up/get together/give details of their last hookup (can we get a shot of class, please?)/come out to their close friends (shouldn't that be done in person?!)/fight/make up/dole out info about health issues we'd rather not know about (look, honey, it's great that that dinner didn't agree with you. do the rest of us need to know the deets about your stomach's battle with that questionable burrito from the lunch cart? i think not.)/etc. But I just remember 'live and let live'…well that and that I find most of peoples' antics highly entertaining…I swear, my newsfeed could be its own TV show. :D

  4. Chips2hoy says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 201010:15 am 

    So true

    I love the end of the article :

    follow us on twitter or facebook!

    Haha

  5. someniceletters says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 201010:29 am 

    Yeah, I feel the same way about this. I mean, if I'm just at home sitting around after school, I have a tendency to have my laptop on, but when I'm out and about I don't really enjoy taking pictures and sending texts to the rest of the world. It's really hard to stay focused on what you're doing and the fun you're having if you keep taking pictures or keep texting someone.

    I even hate it when my family takes pictures for "Important Moments." I have this feel like, "Let's just get on with it already!"

  6. Lisa says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 201011:17 am 

    I completely agree with this. I really liked tis article…it was current, but yet it made you think. CC could use more articles like this.

  7. Alison says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 20103:01 pm 

    For the most part, it's hard to live in the moment and have a good time when you are busy texting others. You are ruining the experience for yourself and the poor friend who has to sit there and be ignored because you're too busy texting.

  8. Lacey says:
    Wed, 1st Sep 20107:49 pm 

    I agree with this article. Now Im still a facebook whore. But, I agree when Im out… im partying. Im not concerned with pictures. Usually, theres always one person in the group who loves pictures. Theyll just post all the pics from the night on their facebook and Ill just take em and stick them on my facebook page. haha. I just hate having friends who say "Oh, I cant get a good picture of you…. stand still.." while Im wasted. Let me be! Besides, thats how cameras and phones get broken.

  9. Facebook's 1# B says:
    Tue, 7th Sep 20104:55 am 

    I am a TOTAL facebook WHORE! Sunday mornings are my ultimate fave…because its when photos from the weekend get uploaded =)

    Sunday my friends and I hit the Dry-Ski slopes for some snowboarding, an hour or so in I shouted down to one of my friends, go get my camera its in my bag ' I neeeeeeed a new facebook profile' fml. I need FB REHAB ASAP!

  10. Jim says:
    Tue, 7th Sep 201012:51 pm 

    Real life happens off line, but it definitely has a way of getting online for everyone to see. Facebook is just the beginning of these problems. A site like http://www.cheatconfession.com may expose your darkest secret. That is if you have pissed someone off by cheating on them.

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