From Ice To Nice: The 5 Day Challenge

[The following post was written by dating coach, Kira Sabin, a keg of dating and relationship wisdom. She’s been helping people find love for years so we thought we’d tap this keg and see what sort of brilliant advice she has for the CollegeCandy readers. Drink up!]

Ever have that friend that gets approached all the time?  Sure, she may be pretty, smart or flirty but for some reason guys flock to her like white on rice.  It may you leave you scratching your head and muttering under your breath “what is SO great about her?” You probably have friends that are funnier, smarter and prettier, yet she gets the guys.

Well, I know her secret and I’m going to share it with you.

Ask the average person how we communicate and they will most likely answer, “Duh, with words….or text messages.”  Yet, did you know for every message that we deliver verbally we actually give off 12 non-verbal signals?  In fact, researchers around the world agree that body language accounts for at least 65% of communication.  Some say up to 90%.  Ever hear the saying “actions speak louder than words?”  Truer words have never been spoken.

Every day we send off thousands of signals that we are not even aware of. Without even knowing it, we are letting others know that we are open (or not) to meeting new people, never even opening our mouths.  How you stand, create eye contact, smile and even set-up the situation may be helping you or kicking your ass.

Don’t worry, ladies; my friends and I have got your back.  CollegeCandy and The College Crush have come together to bring you a special dating makeover challenge: From Ice to Nice – Five Days to Being More Approachable

Starting on Monday, October 18th, we will have 5 days of simple challenges to help you stop hating on your friend and start getting noticed.

Before we begin, though, remember one thing: this is only going to be what you put in to it.  If you watch my informational (yet somewhat dorky) videos every day and roll your eyes, things are not going to change.  You are not going to change. But accept the challenges, ask the questions and make an effort, and people will notice you.

For the better.

Here is how it works: Every day we will be introducing a new theme with a video that has an easy challenge for you to work on to be more approachable. Get your friends involved (everything is more fun with friends), do the challenges, see how you change, and report back in the comments section on what was easier or harder than you thought!

And if becoming a more approachable you isn’t incentive enough to get involved, we’ve got an extra little carrot to dangle in front of you: At the end of the week, we’ll randomly choose one commenter to win a free one hour one-on-one session with the Dating Makeover Coach herself, Kira Sabin, to get to the nitty gritty of what isn’t working and what is.

Who’s excited?  We are.

See you bright and early Monday morning!

Check out Kira’s other insights into dating here.



  1. Jennifer says:

    I honestly think I really need this. People never come to talk to me, but then I know this one girl who everyone just crowds around!

  2. Beth says:

    I'm really excited for this series! It sounds very interesting, and as a perpetually single (seriously. 20 and without ever going on a real date.) girl, I can't wait to see the tips!

  3. Lenna says:

    Hrm, sounds good. I've never approached…I'm much too scary I bet! Bahaha~

  4. Miranda says:

    Ooh, I'm so excited for this! I hope it works!

  5. Charlotte says:

    oooh i'm really excited for this. i really hope it works!!

    Charlotte xxx

  6. Mari says:

    sounds fun :) cant wait

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  8. Celeste says:

    Im so in! I for sure need this!

  9. Alexandra says:

    Ah! This is SO true!

    I'm always hanging out at the frats, and usually I get approached by guys a LOT. And honestly, I'm so friendly with everyone that I usually don't notice that these guys approaching me are flirting with me until my friends point it out. Whenever I go to the gym, guys talk to me.

    But I always smile and walk with a spring in my step. (Okay, that last part sounds SO corny!) I'm not prejudiced, and I talk to everyone. I'm not sure what it is, but if you're at a party and one guy is talking to you, guys will take that as an internal cue to come talk to you also, and soon you'll have 3 or 4 different guys.

    Just keep a smile on your face (:

  10. […] to the College Dating Makeover Challenge, From Ice to Nice: 5 Days to Be More Approachable. We are beyond excited that you are joining […]

  11. Becca says:

    ooh this is so exciting~~! i'm 18 and have been on only a few (awkward) dates but it's about time i got out there and was confident! i'm so shy, i'm sure it comes off as disinterest or coldness. but now it's time to SMILE :D

  12. Lauren says:

    I am painfully shy. I can't seem to even bring myself to make eye contact with someone I find attractive. Smiling is such a great and simple tip I can't wait to hear what else you will have me doing this week! I am on board!

  13. Jen says:

    I remembered to do this all day today! I was honestly not sure how this was going to go since I am pretty shy, but I could just see a change in the way I was noticed This is great advice I can't wait to see more!

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  16. xerilagang says:

    I do not know what it is, but if you're at a party and a guy talking about you will consider this as an internal signal to talk to you too, and soon you will have 3 or 4 different types.

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