Single Girl Society: Being Single Doesn’t Mean Being On The Prowl 24/7

January 14, 2011 4:00 pm     Posted in Advice, Relationships  Anjli - University of Texas at Austin g+ page


By Anjli

In the last year, it seems as though being single has been my specialty. While flings and hookups have come and gone (pun intended) and dates have left me with some less than desirable memories, my current single status has remained loyally by my side. I’ve learned a lot in the past year and I’ve discovered that single girls around the world are all in the same fabulous pair of shoes.

So if you’re sick of sitting at a table for one, eating a meal portioned for two, I cordially invite you to join The Single Girl Society, where being single is more than status, it’s a lifestyle. Of course, with everything in life, the single girl lifestyle comes with rules and I’ve picked up quite a few along the way. So kick back, grab a drink and let the lessons I’ve learned serve as your very own roadmap to transitioning to and enduring the single life.

Lesson 7: Being Single Doesn’t Mean Being On The Prowl 24/7

Look ladies, we’re single, we’re not in heat! Somehow single girls picked up this stereotype of being blood-thirsty, man-chasing robots and I, for one, think it’s about time we rid ourselves of this awful (but mostly just vomit-inducing) image.

Half the fun of being is single is knowing that your time is 100 percent yours – you decide how you spend it and who you spend it with. Why commit all of your time to finding someone else when you’ve already got yourself?

Lately I’ve encountered girls who feel the need to guilt and reprimand themselves for forgoing makeup during a daytime lunch for fear that, gasp, a man would look over! Before I can even verbally assault them, the girls pull out their compact mirrors to swipe on gloss, fluff up their hair and put on their best pouty face. (What’s that lipstick shade called again? Oh yeah, Desperation.) I’ve never seen such beautiful girls in such an ugly light.

It’s those same girls who spend their single lives compiling endless lists of traits they insist a man they date must possess (oh you know, the usual stuff, a close relationship with his family, dashing smile, impeccable style and a Black AmEx, of course) and it’s those same girls that are making the rest of us look bad.

As single girls we’re all so busy running around and preparing ourselves for a guy who doesn’t even exist yet and for what? To feel even worse when we finally realize that we’re still alone (and broke)?

Being single is like a free pass to be selfish. It’s amazing! Relationships are time consuming and exhausting and expensive, (hello, those Friday night date outfits don’t just magically appear in our closets!) so why not enjoy your singlehood and make your time yours again?

Go to the gym because you want to, not because you want to look skinny the next time you randomly run into your ex. Read the books you’ve been meaning to read because you want to, not because you want to impress your insanely sexy TA. Get a mani/pedi because you want to treat yourself, not because it’s one of the steps in your “Get-Dolled-Up-And-Get-A-Man” routine.

There’s no rule that says as single women, we’re obligated to be on a manhunt. So the next time you’re all “hair done, nails done, everything done, oh you fancy huh?” you might want to ask yourself if the time you spent getting fancy could’ve have been better spent doing something you actually enjoy (like hosting a Gossip Girl marathon for one in the privacy of your living room and your flannel pajamas).

What do you say? You with me…or are you too busy getting all gussied up? Sound off below, single girls!

What are the first 6 rules of the Single Girl Society? Find out right here.

19 Comments on "Single Girl Society: Being Single Doesn’t Mean Being On The Prowl 24/7"

  1. Hannah says:
    Fri, 14th Jan 20114:51 pm 

    AMEN!!!

  2. djshalom says:
    Sat, 15th Jan 201112:31 am 

    agreed. agreed. agreed.

  3. Lisa says:
    Sat, 15th Jan 20113:37 am 

    Thank you so much for saying what I've been feeling!!!

  4. Nikita says:
    Sun, 16th Jan 20114:07 am 

    Seeing as though I've never been on a date (I'm only 19, so it's not really a big deal… to me, at least), and I've never had a serious boyfriend, I have no problem being single. At all. Sure, some days, I'm like, "Man, it would be nice if I had a bf right now." But those thoughts usually occur when I'm watching a Romantic movie. Other than that, I have NO desire to find a guy right now. I love having time to myself, having fun, doing whatever I want to, using my money for myself. I have so many friends right now that have relationship issues and I want to stay the hell away from that. However, I'm not going to totally shut down some guy who asks me out. I'm not against dating, but I'm not looking either. It's whatever.

  5. Rebecca Hawkins says:
    Sun, 16th Jan 20119:42 pm 

    Five stars on this article fo'reals! You hit every point to a T. Thank you for taking the time to find the words of the feelings most of us had. I have to say that I live my life in many of the ways you described….LOVE IT!

  6. michirururu says:
    Mon, 17th Jan 20115:28 pm 

    nice. and we get the extra luxury compared to those gals… just because we're lower maintenance :p

  7. Kristen says:
    Mon, 17th Jan 20119:53 pm 

    Ah! Thank you! I needed to read this

  8. Paola López Plascencia says:
    Mon, 17th Jan 201110:22 pm 

    Totally right! :D

  9. KKP says:
    Tue, 18th Jan 20118:43 am 

    I got out of a really bad relationship just a short while ago, and already my friends are asking me "What's new in your love life? Anyone special?" YES! There is someone special – me! Since the break-up, I eat better, exercise more, study more, spend less money, and have more free time to relax and just enjoy being by myself! There are too many girls who waste time in unhealthy/unrewarding relationships just because they feel like they need to be with someone. This is really bad thinking, and we need to retrain our brains so that young girls don't have to feel freakish or "broken" in some way if they are alone. All my single ladies put your hands up!

  10. @psitutor says:
    Wed, 19th Jan 20111:11 am 

    It's unfortunate that society insists that one is not happy if one is not with a "soul mate" or, at least someone. It is great though that more men are single nowadays and are looking after themselves and becoming men as opposed to remaining juvenile and finding themselves a "mommy" girlfriend/wife.

    Mostly, I don't go out to town to have a drink with female friends. Many are there because they want to "pull" a man, others I find indulge in objectifying men and then wondering why they don't get a phone call.

    I enjoy single hood~ have been for 5 years now. Dated for two months a little ago, take a lover occasionally if they meet the basic standards required for me to spend time in their company. It's not that I'm not interested in a relationship~ but I am not going to settle (the lovers tend to be going in a different direction to me, which is fine, respect means no commitment is not an issue).

  11. Charlotte- University of Birmingham says:
    Wed, 19th Jan 20117:52 am 

    I really love this.
    I have been single for 2 years and during that time I have only ever kissed guys I knew and they never really turned into relationships. While during a lot of this time I was "looking" per say, I was never actively looking. I never dressed up and went out with my friends in the hope of finding someone to lock lips with.
    Now I've started dating a guy I really like it was just because I'd kinda stopped looking. I didn't look at every guy for his potential. With this guy, I just became friends with him and let it happen.
    This is such a fantastic, well written post.

    Charlotte http://www.girlnextdoorfashion.net

  12. @MinzyLing says:
    Wed, 19th Jan 201110:12 am 

    Never had any bf as i'm 21 this year… I dont find anything wrong though. Just that I always do have "free pass to be selfish" Enjoyed reading this article!

  13. S says:
    Wed, 19th Jan 20114:57 pm 

    I love love love being single. I have no one to be held accountable to, and no one who wants to tell me about boring parts of thier day just because they think I should care. And, the best part about being single is hooking up! No commitment, and tons of fun is how I think I should be spending college.

    I have written about all of my stupid, embarrassing, crazy hookups on my blog http://afterthemorningafter.wordpress.com

  14. Commentor says:
    Thu, 20th Jan 201112:48 pm 

    I'm 44 and wasted my youth on misdirected effort on behalf of those afformentioned parasites. But I'm going to make it all worth it if I can … somehow. My recommendation to you young ladies is become the best you can be and try to marry the best man you can by 25 and make sure you are covered if he turns out to be a traitor to you. The best men, at any age, would like to have a lady who "adds value" to his life and I don't mean financially. Become that friend to him such that if you were not so fabulously gorgeous he'd still enjoy your comradery.

  15. Diary Young Asshole says:
    Sat, 22nd Jan 20113:44 pm 

    NO girl wants to be seen acting like a dude while they're single…but every girl wants to act like a dude…

    Are You Thinking This Way About Scary Movies? http://su.pr/23eIZr (millions are)

  16. kevin blumer says:
    Sat, 22nd Jan 201110:09 pm 

    i have been single for a while you kinda get use to doing it its kinda lonely but you have no worries it allso gives you the chance to really motivate and push yourself and get what you want out of life

  17. Brittany bradacy says:
    Mon, 24th Jan 20114:12 am 

    Living I am alone at my hostal. http://www.articlesbase.com/wellness-articles/sou…

  18. Sara says:
    Mon, 24th Jan 20116:36 pm 

    Wow. This is a great and empowering article. I really enjoy it because it is not about man bashing, it is about realizing that every woman does not need to conform to society's harsh expectations. The one thing I learned about life is when you stop looking for love, sometimes it finds you. So in the meantime, keep doing what makes you happy!

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