9 Mistakes Everyone Makes on Their First Date— and How to Avoid Them
January 23, 2011 4:00 pm Posted in Advice, Relationships Tehrene Firman g+ page
Ahhhhh, the first date. It can be the start of something great or can easily take a quick turn down the crapper. You may have thought the date went as perfect as can be, but if Mr. Lover Boy hasn’t called you back for another one in over three days, chances are it didn’t.
Instead of sitting there overanalyzing every single detail of the date and what could have gone wrong (like we all do), I’ll make it simple for you. Here are the mistakes everyone makes on their first date and what you can do to avoid them.
1. Not dressing for the occasion. If you’re going to a baseball game, don’t wear stiletto heels. If you’re going out to eat somewhere nicer than McDonald’s, change out of your sweats. It’s as simple as that. And if you’re Lady Gaga, obviously no rules apply to you.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Make sure you know where you’re going on the date. If it’s a surprise, it’s always better to play it safe and wear something casual. Not too sloppy, not too dressy.
2. Talking about exes. Talking about ex-boyfriends isn’t just annoying on dates— it’s annoying all the time. 3 words: Get. Over. It. And if you can’t, maybe you shouldn’t be dating quite yet. If you do decide it’s time to enter the wonderful world of dating, make sure you keep the conversation far away from ex-land. No guy wants to sit and listen to you whine about how his eyebrows aren’t groomed as well as your ex-boyfriend’s.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Think of good conversation-starters before the date. This way, if there’s an awkward silence, you won’t just bring up whatever pops into your head at the moment, which could very easily be the loser ex-boyfriend who had taken you to the same place in the past.
3. Getting drunk. If you know one glass of wine really gets you feeling loopy, don’t drink three. The last thing a guy wants is you climbing up on the table and giving the whole restaurant a show. Save that for the second date.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Know your limits. Maybe avoid alcohol all together on the first date to make sure you don’t say or do anything you regret. Plus, getting drunk around someone you just met probably isn’t a good idea anyways. You never know about people these days! Craigslist killer, anyone? Thank you Lifetime for officially creeping me out.
4. Being easy. Referring back to the last mistake, don’t give it all up in one night. Drinking alcohol is no excuse. If you really want things to go somewhere with this guy and want him to get to get to know you as a person and have some respect for you, don’t flaunt your goodies at him just yet. Sure, give him a peek— but just from across the table.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Give him a steamy goodnight kiss but leave it at that. If he really likes you, he’ll be back for more!
5. Not shutting up. Conversations on dates are always great. Conversations where the only person that’s talking is you— not so great. Make sure you’re letting the poor guy get a word in every once in awhile. Ask him some questions and find out his interests. How do you know if you have anything in common if you don’t give him the chance to tell you about himself? For all you know, you’re on a date with a total creep. Once he starts talking and tells you about his fifty pet rats and how he still lives with him Mom, you’ll be glad you shut up a little.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Compliment him on something. If you like his shirt, tell him. It’ll start up a conversation, and hmm, maybe even a shopping date!
6. Being overly flirtatious. Give him a challenge! Don’t wink every five seconds, grab his butt, or try pulling any of the Lady and the Tramp noodle-slurping mumbo jumbo. It might freak him out. Okay, it will freak him out.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Give him a sexy smile every once in a while instead. No guy can resist that.
7. Laughing at absolutely everything. C’mon, no one is THAT funny. He may tell a good joke every now and then, but if you’re laughing at every single thing he says he’s probably going to get a little annoyed. If you’re on a date with Andy Samberg, then that’s a different story.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Make HIM laugh! You’ve got jokes, too.
8. Having bad manners. When you’re out to eat there are some crucial things you should keep in mind. Don’t eat food with your hands unless it’s meant to be eaten with your hands. Use a napkin. Don’t spit food into the napkin. Don’t start a burping contest. And definitely keep your mouth closed when you’re chewing. It’s also a good idea to avoid extreme profanity on your first date. If you’re one of those girls that swears at least three times per sentence, try to cool it a bit. Oh, and remember to say “thank you.”
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Go have a talk with Mom before the date. Remember all those times she told you to get your elbows off the table? She knew what she was talkin’ about!
9. Texting. This is also part of having bad manners, but it needs a section just for itself. Texting on a date = major no-no. There is nothing worse than trying to enjoy a great night out when the person you’re with can’t manage to set their phone down for five seconds. It’s awkward and makes the person feel like their date doesn’t even want to be there. Your girlfriends can wait until after the date to find out how big of a hottie he was.
How to Avoid Making the Mistake: Leave your phone in your purse on silent or vibrate. If your Justin Bieber ring tone is going off every couple of minutes, there’s really no point in having it put away in the first place.
Keep these nine things in mind and your next first date will surely turn into a second. What dating mistakes have you made? And what have your dates done to drive you absolutely bonkers? Let us know!
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Alison says:
Sun, 23rd Jan 20115:14 pm
I would say that on a first date, you should avoid subjects such as politics and religion. Those can be touchy subjects.
And don't talk about negative things in your life. He probably doesn't care about your family/friend drama nor how boring your job is.
MichST says:
Sun, 23rd Jan 20117:04 pm
Ha The last one is the most annoying. If a guy I go on a date with is texting constantly on the first date, there is never a second date. It really is insulting.
Jay says:
Mon, 24th Jan 20118:05 am
Talking about the ex=total idiot move. A friend of mine does that constantly and, therefore, screws it up for herself. She does it when we're out with friends too, and it irritates the hell out of me. I tried to tell her…
b.p says:
Tue, 25th Jan 201110:28 am
OMG I can admit im accused of #9… I know i shouldnt be texting while on a date but its just something I will have to grown out of….. cause im really into this new guy im dating but I just gotta learn to put my phone down….
Diary Young Asshole says:
Wed, 26th Jan 20117:07 am
whats up with these pop up ads??…and typo on number 2 Talking instead of taking and I usually do number 9…texting all the time…lol
4 VERY Obvious Reasons Why Lace Front Wigs Were Created http://t.co/u1dqmue <– hilarious comic i just read
Brad says:
Thu, 10th Feb 201112:04 pm
I was on a date once with a girl who couldn't bring herself to stop texting. I asked her once to put the phone away but that only lasted about 10 minutes. When her head next when down to her phone I got up and left the resturant. I then sent her a text thanking her for dinner and letting her know that there would be no second date.
A good man says:
Sun, 13th Feb 201111:27 am
I have a problem with section 5 about staying with your mom if she has a medical condition and you are their to help her, You should not be faulted for that a women should want a man like that. It shows he will take care of you in your time of need not abandon you for the next chick.
Smart Person says:
Thu, 10th Mar 201111:27 pm
THAT DOES NOT COUNT! DUH!
Jacqueline says:
Thu, 23rd Jun 201112:07 am
i personally don't like it when a guy is all over me. my first and only date omygod couldn't even finish the first quarter of the movie before he tried frenching me. and it was a good movie!!! not so great of a kiss