A good commencement speaker can make or break those never ending ceremonies. Often times a good one is the only thing that can save you from boredom and/or that blazing, hot sun. Here are my favorites from the last month.
Amy Poehler (Harvard): Probably one of the funniest speeches I’ve ever seen (and yes, I’ve sat through a lot of them). She starts off arguing that, “every single thing you see in movies is real.” Perfect start to any commencement address. She stresses collaboration and teamwork and how great belonging to a group is – even in the toughest of times.
Even on the hottest days, I’m more likely to be seen in a skirt or dress than shorts — the reason being that I’ve just never really been the biggest fan of shorts, because I’ve never seen them as particularly fashionable. Sure, they’re suitable for working out or for a more casual occasion like a sporting event, but not for much else. Or at least that’s the way I used to feel about shorts.
The more and more I see celebrities or other fashionistas wearing shorts, I’ve started to think that my old feelings about them may have been wrong. When styled appropriately, shorts can look cute and even downright chic. And with so many different styles, colors, and patterns of shorts available, like the eight unique styles seen here, there’s a pair out there for everyone!
Call me a slut. You wouldn’t be the first. And even though I am in a committed, monogamous relationship, I have been known to show off some cleavage, drink a little too much wine with dinner, and even talk to other men. I guess in today’s world, that makes me a slut.
It’s happened to the best of us. We go on two or three seemingly perfect dates with the guy we’ve been obsessing over for the longest time, and then…nothing. No phone call, no texts, no anything! All communication ceases, and we’re left wondering what the hell happened? Automatically we switch into it-must-be-my-fault mode. “Was there something in my teeth?” “Maybe he didn’t like what I was wearing?” “Is it because I ate like a slob at dinner?” “Am I a bad kisser?”
Then we turn to our best friend for advice, and of course she proceeds to ask you the very same questions you asked yourself. As the cycle of self-incrimination continues, we realize we’ve taken the guessing game way too far, far to a point where we almost don’t even remember what the guy in question even looks like anymore.
Then one day, I got sick and tired of the blame game and decided to come up with my own reasons for why guys don’t call us back.
1. You know what they say, girls mature faster than guys do. So in this case, he prematurely assumed that I was looking for a wedding ring and an indefinite life commitment that sent him running scared.
2. He’s a jerk.
Okay so maybe my list is a bit premature. This guy seems to have all the answers though! He’s a dating and relationship coach who has finally revealed all the reasons why guys fall flat on the communication tip. With all of us girls playing Guesstures all the time, it’s refreshing to hear what a guy has to say about why they won’t call back. Read his thoughts here.
[He Said/She Said is a series designed to help all our wonderfully confused readers figure out what he’s really thinking. So every week we’ll be throwing out a topic for debate…and unlike our fave dude, these guys won’t be sugar coating anything for you. But before you jump into their heads (which seriously will make you feel like you need to shower), check out what we think!]
My best friend and I have a lot in common. We both love baked ziti, shoes, Robin Williams movies and playing with makeup. But as much as we can talk for hours and hours about the beauty of a designer stiletto or the genius that is Mrs. Doubtfire, there’s one thing we can’t seem to agree on:
Oral sex.
She’s obsessed with it. LOVES it. And I’m not talking about gettin’ it; I’m talkin’ about giving it. Just mention oral sex (or anything that has the word ‘oral’ in it), and she gets all hot and bothered, touting off the many joys of a good blow job. “You have total control,” she explains. “And it feels so good to know that you’re making that person feel really good.” She also constantly reminds us all to mind the stepchildren and giggles at the mere thought of “how fun balls are!” (Note: This type of conversation gets awkward when it is spurred by someone talking about their oral surgery.) Read More »
Note To The Kids: I get several emails a week asking me to respond personally on email. I won’t do it. Stop asking.
Now back to your regularly scheduled column.
Dear Tuffy Luv,
I apologize in advance for this being long and probably confusing. Okay. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a couple months, and it’s really great. We’ve always had a long distance relationship; a couple weeks after we started dating, he moved 5 hours away for an internship. It was okay, he came back once a month and stayed at my house during those weekends (I still live with my parents). This internship lasted four months, and about halfway through I spent a week there with him. At the end of the week, I told him I loved him. He said it back, and it was cute and good and happy. Things seriously took a turn for the worse, though. He grew distant, I confronted him, and he confessed that he didn’t really love me. I was absolutely distraught, broken. But I truly did appreciate his honestly (even though it was a couple months late) and we worked through it. He moved back home soon after and things got really good again. We were still long distance though, he lives at school about an hour and a half away, but he still visited every weekend.
All of this talk about copyrighting Mike Tyson’s tattoo in The Hangover Part II got me thinking. Why stop there? Here are some other famous celebrity “parts” that should be copyrighted at the same time.
Who else should be copyrighting their kickass body parts?
This month’s Seventeen is extra bright and peppy and I find myself unable to turn away. Maybe it’s the presence of the word “FREE” on the cover, or maybe it has more to do with the promise of perfect hair all summer. Hell, maybe the cover is such an assault on my eyeballs because its cover girl, Lucy Hale (who is actually totally cute and cool and has amazing style!) is decked out in some seriously neon colors, complete with an attention-grabbing feather earring. And I’m not gonna lie – I totally want to see if I can rock that single feather earring myself.
The cover story was predictable sap, a famous star insisting that she’s really just a big dork who, in this case, loves to sing Taylor Swift songs in her car. Twenty-one-year-old Lucy also makes a rather unfortunate comparison between the character she plays in her newest movie and Miley Cyrus, and pulls out some sermon about what it takes to be a role model. But she plays the best character on one of the most addictive TV shows out there (Pretty Little Liars), and has really pretty eyes and a surprisingly beautiful singing voice, so I’ll her forgettable interview slide.
This issue kept going with the whole bright theme – from urging readers to wear hot pink matte lipstick (try it, it’s actually really fun) to pimping out some crazy neon hair accessories. The not so bright spot in all this? Their fashion section, which tells girls everywhere that it’s cool to wear flat oxfords with a nice dress, accompanied by a picture of Kendall Jenner looking totally leggy and gorgeous in her ensemble. Like, HELLO? We don’t wear heels because we love the way they feel; some of us need a little stiletto so that our legs don’t look like little stubs. Every bone in my five-foot–tall body burned at this. But hey, if you can get away with this look (or have a body like Kendall Freaking Jenner), more power to you. Read More »
Before I even start in on this episode, let me just ask one very important question:
Who plans a wedding on their first date?! WHO DOES THAT? And who ends up at a wedding chapel and doesn’t even get married? Why the hell would you even plan that crap? Honestly, with 115 minutes left in the episode, I was hoping Ashley would say ‘I do’ and end this season on a high note. But she did not. And I had to sit through another 2 hours of over-produced and cheesy romantic TV.
So let’s get down to business. The business of oversharing and really depressing life stories, to be more specific.. Apparently everyone on The Bachelorette is damaged in some way. Or they just think the way to Ashley’s heart is through her….uh….heart. I mean, that maybe they can get her to pity them enough to pick them. Read More »