Sex in the News: Do all Powerful Men Cheat?

May 24, 2011 3:30 pm     Posted in News, Sex  Ashley - University of Michigan g+ page


By Ashley

For many people it was no surprise that California’s former governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and ex-IMF chief, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, were both caught in significant sex scandals earlier this month. Just like many powerful politicians before them, including Bill Clinton, John Edwards, John McCain, Gary Hart, Donald Trump, John Ensign, Eliot Spitzer, John F. Kennedy, Ted Kennedy, Franklin D. Roosevelt, (and the list goes on), Schwarzenegger and Strauss-Kahn just seemed to be following the same broken-down path as their predecessors, from serious power to serial infidelity. For many people, the correlation between powerful men and philandering is old news. Like a used-up cliché, it becomes unsurprising and even predictable to assume that influential men are acting out and sleeping around. (Check out Why Dudes Downgrade)

However, Dr. Douglas Weiss, a well-established marriage counselor and the president of the American Association for Sex Addiction Therapy, speaks out against this popular assumption in his interview with Postmedia news. “There are a lot of very successful, type-A personality men who don’t cheat,” he says. Weiss explains that cheaters come from all different socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds. Instead of having money or power in common, many philanders simply value pleasure over principles and share the need to fulfill sexual addictions. Weiss concludes by suggesting several traits that are better signs of a man’s infidelity including, “unaccounted-for time and spending, complaints about the couples’ sex life, avoiding sex, or displays of emotional immaturity.” Although these are not definite signs of infidelity, they are much better indicators than the behavior of a long-line of shady politicians. It is not the high-profile life style, the money, or the power that creates a cheater. Weiss adds, “People cheat because they want to cheat.”

Cheaters have no distinguishing mark, no scarlet ‘A’ burned into their chests, and we can’t pick them out based on their success, their position in society, or their cash-flow. The truth is, anyone is capable of infidelity, not just the rich and famous. Although I am not suggesting to be paranoid, untrusting, or suspicious, it is important to know the facts. Most statistics show that 50-70% of men have cheated at least one in their lives and even though politicians may make up a decent portion of that percent, there is still a chance that others to be similarly unfaithful. And if these stats extend beyond the rich and famous, that means it extends into our college campuses. So what does that mean for the average college girl?

Have you even been cheated on? Have you ever cheated? What made you do it?

15 Comments on "Sex in the News: Do all Powerful Men Cheat?"

  1. mary ann fay says:
    Tue, 24th May 20118:17 pm 

    i know that stars get alot of attention and gossip but we are all human and we make mistakes . no its not ok to cheat., but thats a private matter and it should remain that way. those two need to deal with this themselves and not the whole world. kids aare at steak here and a marriage we all should mind our own buisness yes i see this site and i am making a comment but its something that needs to be said. were all only human.

  2. fmac says:
    Tue, 24th May 20119:48 pm 

    It is a choice that should not be made.

  3. 730 Marti says:
    Tue, 24th May 20119:49 pm 

    I was sure Jesse James cheated with what was on the bottom of the barrel. Arnold just proved me wrong.

  4. agitprop says:
    Tue, 24th May 201110:31 pm 

    I think that you have to take into account the fact that with many "stars" (politicians or thers), the feeling that they are above the rest of humanity gives them a sense of entitlement, and of impunity. The (male) nobles of Europe had the right to have sex with peasant brides-to-be before their wedding. Power seems to make may men feel that they are invincible and want to prove to themselves that they are. It would be interesting to do a study in social psychology on the parallels between priests abusing minors and politicians abusing women (and young men). There could be many interesting parallels.

  5. Debbie says:
    Tue, 24th May 201111:07 pm 

    Pardon this crude comment, but it has been in most men's DNA from the very beginning to need to "stick it in somewhere" as often a possible. When people become celebrities, it's difficult to suddenly take that in. They can't help but think, "I'm famous, I'm better than the public." It's a subsconscious belief for most of them. Attractive male celebrities have beautiful women around them all the time, many of whom wouldn't mind trying to get between the sheets with these men. Famous men can't help wanting to screw whenever they think they can get away with it; once again, it's in their DNA.

  6. Andy says:
    Tue, 24th May 201111:13 pm 

    South Park already answered this: http://www.southparkstudios.com/full-episodes/s14… (Rich, successful men suddenly want to have sex with many, many women, and the nation's top scientists are called in to put a stop to the epidemic. After extensive testing, some of the boys in South Park Elementary are also diagnosed as sex addicts.)

    Are you going to listen to foul mouthed kids or "president of the American Association for Sex Addiction Therapy"?

  7. Claudia says:
    Tue, 24th May 201111:34 pm 

    as someone who has cheated and been cheated on…,its never ever right and the recovery process, if there is a recovery at all, is just as painful as the betrayal be you rhe betrayer or the betrayed

  8. Jbullh says:
    Wed, 25th May 201112:09 am 

    Some may say its in a mans DNA, but the truth is one cannot judge all by the actions of one group. Many woman and men have both been cheated on, and powerful woman are just as guilty. The regular (non-celebrity) public has woman cheating all the time too. I have cheated and been cheated on. I didn't know I was cheated on until a year or two after my relationship with the person ended, so it didn't bother me much. However, I had always been against it because I couldn't imagine the pain it would cause. I cheated on one person out of numerous relationships, and it was with the same person a few times. Sometimes its not just to viably satisfy an urge, for me it was to complete a chapter of my life that I had been unable to do until that point.

    The person was in college with me, had a b.f….and we stopped talking, then I started dating someone, and the person from college came back into the picture and this individual was now single, we were great friends and we really had a thing for each other, but never acted, then finally I was dating and the other was available. For myself, I knew I'd regret not being with this person, thats why I cheated….Kind of glad I did too, because things didn't work out with the person I was dating anyway, and I'm happy that I didn't give up on something that I really wanted.

    It's diff for all people, everyone may have their reasons, and I don't condone it, because it does hurt people, and its morally incorrect. However, those mentioned in the article are on different levels, they are to be held to a higher level of responsibility, and many of them have children. Those who cheat when in HS or college are doing wrong (like myself) but at least were not married, have families/children, or hold positions of political power. Either circumstance is not right, but ones much more unacceptable than the other.

  9. Mark says:
    Wed, 25th May 20116:21 am 

    It's never right to do that when married. However I confess when I was single between marriages #1 and #2 which last eight years I was guilty of of quite a few affairs. No children were involved. Sometimes they would drop me but most of the time I would drop them. I had fun but after about six years started to fill empty and unfulfilled in life. To be truthful, I felt also the women were just using me and really didn't love me as a person. When I did finally meet my beautiful wife, I felt like I was in heaven and monogomous all the way. To me, true love trumps sex partners.

  10. dateing sites says:
    Wed, 25th May 20117:57 am 

    As what you have mentioned not all politicians are faithful. I agree with you and even in other countries their leaders have the same attitude. It is just ordinary to them.

  11. NLJ says:
    Wed, 25th May 201111:03 am 

    LOL, right on. I'm sure there could have been worse, but he'd have to turn over quite a few more rocks, and I don't think he had time for that!

  12. nessa says:
    Wed, 25th May 201110:26 pm 

    Never cheated but have been cheated on and it hurts. It took me months to recover because when I go into a relationship, I jump in 100%. (Which may seem like a naive thing to do but when you find the right person it'll be great–I also don't date like an entire football team). The thing that helped me get through is remembering life isn't fair. Cheaters are good people, are bad people, are selfish people, donate to the food bank, are powerful, and are "losers". Once someone hurts you, drop them and work on yourself. =)

  13. Rebecca says:
    Thu, 26th May 201112:13 am 

    The thing you wrote about the male nobles having the right to have sex with brides-to-be is actually a common misconception. While rape and sexual assault were frequent in the middle ages they were against any laws and customs that did exist. This would have been considered amoral and while it may have happened, it would not have been considered a right.

  14. worldofwarcraftonline says:
    Thu, 26th May 20116:07 pm 

    Do powerful men cheat because of power? No no, they just get caught a lot more. In contrast to cheating men with power, think of the amount of poolboys, tennis instructors, and personal trainers their "victimized" wives cycle through on a weekly basis – and those wives never get caught. Further, what's better to cover up a trail of deceit by putting the spotlight on the person most likely to discover the deception? It's a brilliant tactic that, if we're going with ridiculously specious DNA arguments, is probably woven into the XX chromosome (with the logic supporting the male DNA explanation for male gallivanting, this counter-argument is definitely on par with the 72 IQ crowds take on the matter) . With Lady MacBeth-like talents, these wives destroy their husband's credibility. If he ever does catch her man-wiched between her poolboy and tennis instructor, the press won't care what he says about his wife. They'll just accuse him of trying to avoid responsibility for betraying his wife, whom with no remorse, brilliantly sobs into a handkerchief at all times outside the confines of their private estate. So it isn't that powerful men cheat more often than other humans of any gender. They just get caught at it more often and are significantly out-played by their wives. Congratulations wife of rich powerful guy number-whatever. You now get half of his stuff AND your choice of hot young studs to service you in the Caribbean with the press behind you all the way, supporting your rekindled attraction to the opposite sex after such a terrible man betrayed you. And don't say this doesn't happen. Because more likely than not, this is probably the case most of the time. You have no idea how cruel, calculating, and subtle these wives are. They spend their whole lives training for this crap. Once he says, "I do", she wins and he might as well say, "I'm doomed".

  15. diditdat says:
    Sat, 28th May 201110:10 am 

    hey you don't have to be powerful to cheat. it dosen't matter what's you name…..it's all about if you got the game!

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