How to Survive without Harry Potter
I read “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone” for the first time when I was 12 years old. I am now 22. For at least ten years, we have all lived with the saga of Harry Potter existing in a sort of screensaver background to our lives. I can measure events through high school by Harry Potter book releases and movie premieres. The end of Harry Potter really signifies the true end of childhood for us. And now, as the premiere for the very last Harry Potter movie approaches, I have to wonder: how the hell are we going to survive without Harry Potter?
I mean, really? What excuse will we have for discussing the politics of a fantasy world without looking like complete nerds? What other opportunities will exist for us to dress up in schoolgirl outfits and capes? Let’s be real: Harry Potter was the greatest thing to ever happen to us. It became socially acceptable to tap into your inner nerd. So, really, what are we going to do now?
Now that we won’t have Harry Potter, that triumphant hero, in our lives, I have a few suggestions that may or may not work.
Stock up Harry Potter merch. Have a friend who works at a theater? Ask them to sneak you a few extras – bracelets, buttons, posters, standees, whatever they have. Then, slowly but surely, build that little nerd shrine in your closet. (Just kidding, but seriously.)
Spruce up your collection. Personally, my collection of Harry Potter books are looking a little rough (and my brother lost all the jackets for the hard covers, which is adorable). Can I recommend scouring thrift stores for not-bad copies of Harry Potter? That way, you can keep your memories looking pretty, rather than like leftovers from the $1 book bin at a flea market.
Rev up your envy of Emma Watson. If there is anything I’ve learned from the Harry Potter movies, it’s that I want to be Emma Watson. She’s pretty; she’s intelligent; she’s actually kind of talented; she’s rich. Then, every time you see her in a non-Harry Potter movie you can remember your jealousy, and affection, for her as Hermione.
Massive post-Harry Potter party. After you’re done being emotionally compromised by the last movie, and after you’ve driven home crying hysterically, throw yourself a Harry Potter themed party. Have your friends wear their best wizard or witch gear; drink “butterbeer” (beer); and play all the Harry Potter movies on loop. Harry Potter drinking game is optional, but highly recommended.
Read Harry Potter blogs. Get your HP fix by rereading the musings of others. Can I recommend Rereading Harry Potter? Interesting and funny analysis of the Harry Potter books. Reading the thoughts of other fans is pretty much perfect for remembering why you loved the books in the first place.
Find a new obsession. Seriously… Superman, Ryan Reynolds, reading exercise magazines. Find something else to focus on so you don’t constantly remind yourself that your childhood is over.
If all else fails, Denial. Do you really think J.K. Rowling is going to just let this cash cow die? I do not think so. Prepare for an onslaught of vaguely Harry Potter related material from J.K., including the mysterious Pottermore and maybe a book or five.