One Month Challenge: I Love My Body, Week Two

By Ashley

[Everyone’s got a vice, a bad habit, something they know they need to change. Unfortunately, everyone also has a million excuses why they just can’t do it. Not anymore. Every month we will be following a different CollegeCandy writer as she takes on a personal challenge. Last month Tiffany spent a month at Outward Bound and challenged her physical limits. This month, Ashley's going to try to stop hating on her body so much. Can she do it!? Could you?]

After week one of this challenge there’s only one thing I know for sure, this is definitely a learning process. I spent the entire first week getting to know just how bad my bad habit is. Not only did I learn about how much this bad habit consumes me (yes, it consumes me, YIKES!), I got to see all the different ways in which it manifests. I realized that in order to change my mindset I’d have to first do a few important things:

1. Take a long hard look in the mirror and pick out all of the things I like about my body- Being the hater I am, I imagined not having much to say, but I did it and I had a fair amount to share with myself. Actually doing it felt silly and embarrassing (I had that ”What I like about you” song playing over and over in my head) even though there was no one around, but it felt good in the end. I am happy to say, “I like what I’m working with.”

2. Get my boo on my side- Although my boyfriend is already my biggest fan who loves and supports me no matter what, I needed to fill him in on the situation. After giving him the 411 on my bad habit and letting him in on my challenge, he said he’d help call me out on my negative behavior. I know this may sound risky to have someone else help correct me when I’m drinking haterade, but I think it can only help. I trust him to be honest and helpful and to not give me a break- sometimes tough love is what we need.

3. Pamper my body and make it feel good- Yes, I did this. I gave myself a nice, long, and hot bath and it felt GREAT! Every body needs a little lovin’.

Completing those three tasks had me more motivated than ever before (okay, more motivated than last week). Now that week two has come and gone, I can truly say I have taken significant steps in the right direction. This week I…

…ate what I wanted and didn’t allow myself to feel guilty. I didn’t allow myself to comment on where those Cheetos would end up, like I normally would have, and I just didn’t care. It wasn’t because I lost my desire to be healthy- I just didn’t care because I knew that one day of eating a bit of junk food wasn’t going to bloat my belly or fatten my thighs. It was only going to make me feel good. I’m a “I’ll believe it when I see it girl” and since I saw that nothing bad happened to my body after eating food I enjoy, I could relax about it. That’s another thing I’m learning on this journey- I need to relax about things like this.

… let others compliment me without saying anything other than thank you. This also felt great. Normally when I would hear kind words about my body from others, I’d comment on how I still had a few more pounds to lose or how I wish could wear this or that. Sometimes it’s good to just take it. Bathe in it. Smile about it. Whatever. Hearing other people notice that I look healthier and more fit feels good and I should be proud of the hard work I’ve put my body through. How can hard work pay off if you never let it? This is another thing to add to the list of what I’ve learned- acknowledge accomplishments.

… simply stopped comparing my body to other people’s bods. The body I have now is the only body I’ll ever have and it’s mine to keep so I had better own it. I’ll admit that looking through my latest Cosmo and Victoria’s Secret magazine was rough, but I found out it is possible to admire the bodies of other women without putting down my own.

Next week I am going to try on clothes that I find “unflattering for my body type.” Not because I want to commit fashion suicide, but because it’s possible that I’ve been being too hard on myself for a long while and I may like what I see after all.

I can honestly say that I feel like learning these things about myself will go a long way. Rarely do I take the time to self-reflect on how I treat me. Do you?