Why I Don’t Have a Facebook
It’s Monday, and I’m sitting through ANOTHER boring lecture, this one about how to properly treat our ‘residence halls’ (makes it sound so much nicer than the sweaty, dirty building it is, right?) and what could happen if we get caught inebriated (aka drunk, smashed, hammered, ‘slizzered’ wasted, etc. etc.). Myself and the girl next to me let out an uninterested sigh at the same time, and we catch each other’s gazes and smile. Soon we’re talking about our dorm, and the freshman girl who got sent to the hospital on the first night of school for alcohol poisoning. Inside I’m cheering because I met another normal person. However I see the relationship hangs on the balance when she asks for my last name so she can add me on Facebook.
“Mmm, I don’t have a Facebook.” I try to say in the most positive light.
Her eyebrows rise in surprise.
This happens about twice a day in college. I get it. Social media has become a part of everyone’s daily life, even my 60-year-old great aunt is “on the Twitter!”. What scares me is how dependent we have become on it.
I go to hang out in a friend’s dorm room and five girls in there are on their laptops, on Facebook. Isn’t that annoying?! Why are you talking to people online when we are in the room with you?
Why must you document every college moment with a snapshot and then upload it? You realize you don’t look cute in your pajamas unloading your massive supply of Pop Tarts and Easy Mac, and that it probably isn’t smart to post pictures of a greasy you holding a Coors light in a crowded basement. People have the need to post every moment of their day to show how much fun they’re having at college. And if they don’t talk about it then people must assume that nothing’s happening with them or that they have dropped off the face of the earth.
Recently I saw a presentation about social media that laid down some hard facts. Lady Gaga has more Twitter followers then a lot of countries have people. Besides the point that it’s about time Lady Gaga ran for office or got her own country, people are now choosing to do most of their socializing activities online. Working, dating, going to school, networking, and more. While I am all for technology, I feel like we are losing something. Excuse me for sounding like your grandma who insists you write long love letters to your beau instead of a text message, but what is so wrong with communicating in person? Making friends in real time? Do I have to hit accept for us to be real friends? You aren’t my boyfriend unless it’s Facebook official?
I personally know a total of five people under twenty that do not have a Facebook, which is semi-comforting. A lot of people have actually told me they wish they had the courage to delete theirs, but they feel like they couldn’t even manage without it. What if everyone took a break from it? It would be like that family vacation in 8th grade where your parents dragged you and all your relatives on the vacation from hell to enjoy nature and bonding, all out of range of your cell phone service (that couldn’t have only been my family and the Griswold’s, right?). Yes, you would bitch about how you wouldn’t know any of the new inside jokes when you get back and that your boyfriend has already forgotten what you looked like and moved on. But then you started to remember how funny (or corny) your parents could be and how much fun it was to not spend every Saturday at the mall. Once you got back you hugged the cell and the laptop for dear life, but it was a much needed break from it all.
So what I’m trying to say is, I don’t hate Facebook, but I wish it wasn’t so ‘vital’ to people. I want to live my life not glued to a computer, but talking and laughing face to face and having a good time. So if you want to be friends, don’t add me, just ask!
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Andih says:
Sun, 23rd Oct 20112:40 pm
I feel the exact same way, which is why I deleted my facebook this summer. I get the awkward facebook request in person, but I actually feel much better and more stress-free without one. Thanks for the post
dietcokeandlove says:
Sun, 23rd Oct 20112:43 pm
I temporarily deactivated my Facebook after my ex and I broke up so I wouldn't have to deal with the insane jealousy thing all girls go through when someone writes on a wall and all that. It was the best decision. I got it back because the editor for my school newspaper made a group for the paper so we could all post ideas/etc. but I'm nowhere near as dependent on it.
Ashley L. Coates says:
Sun, 23rd Oct 20113:42 pm
I've moved around my entire life, so Facebook is how I keep up with all my old friends. It lets me see how they're doing, check out cute new haircuts, etc. really easily. I've also met a lot of people that became some of my best friends from around the world. Other than that, I don't really go on FB much. I don't play games, I rarely use the chat option, and I don't stay on for more than ten minutes at a time (and I only go on once a day!).
Some people are insanely dependent on it. I'm just glad I'm not one of them:)
http://textbooksandtofu.blogspot.com/
Stacy says:
Sun, 23rd Oct 20114:41 pm
Short and simple. Amen.
anna says:
Sun, 23rd Oct 20116:07 pm
I like how you talked about it without judging people who use facebook and other social networking sites. I agree with you, I wish everyone could use technology a little more wisely.
Amanda says:
Sun, 23rd Oct 20119:01 pm
I have tried to deactivate for a while, but ultimately always came back because it is my main way to keep in touch with family, close and not-so-close, not that I've gone to school and will be getting married in the near future. Naturally, keeping it results in that positive part of things, but it also results in still wasting time looking at random things.
I met a girl this past spring who responded to the facebook question by saying that she finally deleted hers, but it was a hard thing to do.
It's difficult because there are pro's to keeping it.
thank you says:
Sun, 23rd Oct 201111:32 pm
Thank god for this, seriously
I am a sophomore in college and I deleted my facebook about a year ago- when people ask to add me or tag me in pictures, I always get the same look when I tell them I don't have one- my friends "jokingly" make fun of me in front of other people that I think I am better than everyone else because I don't have one- I don't feel like I am a cooler, more hipster, more mysterious person who is "going against the grain".
In reality, I don't have a facebook because it makes me feel like shit the second I login. If people are willing to listen to my explanation (which they usually are out of shock and curiosity), I always give the same spiel.
I hate facebook and I don't have one because when you get down to it, facebook is simply a high tech forum in which you judge others. Really…and only two scenarios can come out of this 1) you judge yourself against someone else and you come to the conclusion that you are "better" than them (skinnier, richer, prettier, smarter, cuter boyfriend, better prom dress etc) but this gives you a false sense of fulfillment- you are not better than this person just based on what is on the internet- it is a false sense of "achievement"
2) you come to the conclusion that you are "lesser" than the person you are currently stalking (uglier, fatter, lamer family vacations, less friends, less picture comments etc)- then you just feel like absolute shit FOR NO REASON-
the majority of the shit on FB is exaggerated, photoshopped, or intensely planned and thought out- we are not real people on it and it doesn't benefit anyone's self esteem
Anna says:
Mon, 24th Oct 201112:50 am
Ahhh finally a post that explains why i don't have a Facebook. I did have one a long time ago but i never logged on much plus , if i didn't want to talk to people i knew in high school back then why in the world would i want to talk to them now. I used to be obsessed with MySpace when i was sixteen and got into a lot of stupid trouble because of it when i would talk to this creepy older guy. Thank goodness nothing bad happened but it really made me realize how weird people are online.
Virginia says:
Mon, 24th Oct 20119:44 am
I don't have Facebook either and you're so right…the second a new acquaintance finds out that you don't have Facebook, they look at you like you're from another planet. It'll be three years this December that I haven't had Facebook. I totally understand the uses of Facebook and how helpful it can be with keeping in touch with people, and I may even get it back someday. But for now I really don't miss it.
Nora says:
Mon, 24th Oct 20111:01 pm
It's really sad, but the truth is that I don't trust people without Facebook. I guess I should rethink that because you seem totally normal!
Jessica Zaleski - University of Florida says:
Mon, 24th Oct 20114:58 pm
I have contemplated deleting my Facebook before, but I am about to graduate so I feel like I want to stay updated on everyone I know to see what they are up to after graduation and to stay in touch. But I do agree that people should be less dependent on FB. I used to go to my friends too and EVERYONE would be on computers. So Annoying.
caate says:
Mon, 24th Oct 20115:26 pm
I've deleted my facebook before, it was a nice break, it really was. But I'm shy and most of the friends I've made now, I've met online and I wouldn't change it for anything. It was easier for me to talk to somebody and be comfortable talking to them online, I hang out with them in person now but still. There's also just some people I want to keep in contact with and facebook is much easier for that, those people I know and talk to but don't want to have my phone number to contact me at any moment in time they feel like it. I don't in any way depend on it and I'm not constantly on it but it is nice to have sometimes.
Miriam says:
Mon, 24th Oct 20116:44 pm
I don't understand why people always create this false dichotomy between having a Facebook and spending time with people in real life. Thanks to Facebook, I'm able to spend more of my time with people in real life and less of it trying to frantically call people or catch them in person to invite them to things. Furthermore, I'm able to keep up with the lives of people who live far away in a way that talking on the phone every once in a while simply wouldn't do.
Elizabeth says:
Mon, 24th Oct 201110:58 pm
I deleted my Facebook account almost two years ago, and I couldn't be happier about my decision. It's a massive timesuck that seems to make people think that every tiny thing they do each day is worth notifying the world about. My ego's just not big enough to make me think like that. I barely care what kind of coffee I had this morning; why the h*** would I care what kind you had?
Miriam says:
Tue, 25th Oct 20118:46 pm
Saying "I wish everyone could use technology a little more wisely" implies that you're judging people, because you're saying that their ways of using technology aren't "wise" and yours are.
anna says:
Wed, 26th Oct 201110:09 am
Nope. I meant everyone. And in any case I wasn't talking about myself – I commented on how Maura didn't judge.
KH12345 says:
Sun, 30th Oct 201111:44 am
The only reason I could see Facebook being a positive thing would be for people who have family members who live far away and would like to stay in touch with them. Other than that it is just a big popularity contest for people who feel they need to broadcast every second of their lives so people think they are important. People have been asking me for years to get a Facebook, but I just don't see the point. I have more important things to spend my time on.
Mikee says:
Mon, 31st Oct 20111:32 am
I used to be all about social networking, especially when Myspace first hit the scene. I was on there 24/7 and utilized Myspace as a promoting tool when I was a former Nightclub promoter. I literally became consumed with it. As I grew older (25 years old now) I met a beautiful fiance, traveled a lot, and started my own business, I now focus all my attention on my business, my family, and my 2 animals. One Cat and One Dog. hahaha. What I am really trying to get at here is that you really don't need a Facebook to make yourself happy. Go out for a walk, go to the gym, go to the movies, go out to eat at a random resteraunt that you've never been to before, find a fun hobby, involve yourself with charity, or if your good or passionate about something and really want to be positively occupied, go start a business! I make way more money now than when I did when I had Myspace because I spend much of my time on the business, which enables me to do more things then go online and waste my time.
Larissa says:
Tue, 1st Nov 20119:39 pm
I tried deleting my facebook, but that didn't last long; you see, almost all the events here at school are posted on there, and ONLY there, so basically if you want to do anything you need to have a facebook.
Maura - Rider University says:
Wed, 2nd Nov 201112:20 pm
I know what you mean, it can kind of seem like someone without a facebook has something to hide. But don't assume anything before you get to meet a person! Due to some communication errors, my roommate and I didn't get to meet or talk til the day we moved in. Both of us were freaked out that the other was going to be crazy or antisocial, but we clicked on the first day and we get along great.
Gina Farmer says:
Wed, 2nd Nov 20119:30 pm
I cant really say that I hate facebook. Its just that I made a lot of friends using it. Although it is kinda awkward having people you dont know just add you up. Its kinda like getting a text message from an unknown number on your mobile phone. Good thing there is a website which traces a phone number. But all in all I dont really hate facebook, just those people who use it badly.
Ely says:
Thu, 3rd Nov 20114:04 pm
I'm a chronic facebook user, but I'm on it because of school (of all reasons!)… my program is all about social networking, and if you're not on fb, you miss a lot of info.
There's really no need to bash it and the users so much–some users are addicted, we know….
However, if it hasn't already been mentioned, there is an equally important drawback that wasn't really mentioned–> Invasion of privacy? i.e. FB is a corporate site, that mines the data that you put on your page, then sells it right back to you via marketing. And it measures and records all the stuff you click, and filters your newsfeed and targets ads for you based on what it thinks you should see. creepyyyyyy…..
So… yeah, I gotta admire your fortitude– I wish I could opt out too. :/
Lynsey says:
Thu, 3rd Nov 20119:36 pm
I don't have facebook either!!!:) I'm so glad to find someone else who doesn't have one!
Priscilla says:
Thu, 3rd Nov 20119:37 pm
It is funny how at the end of the article, there is a link to "fan us on facebook". HA
Alex says:
Thu, 3rd Nov 201111:52 pm
I thought I was the only one. I have never had a Facebook. And people think I am crazy. I don't feel the need for one. Any pictures I need to show to my friends, I can do so in person. Anyone that I don't see on a regular basis doesn't need to see my pictures. Same goes for what I am doing.
Angie says:
Fri, 4th Nov 201112:37 am
I was never a big Facebook user. I never saw the point in having 500 friends and only talking to 20. I deleted mine after it caused stupid drama and I asled myself why I have it in the first place. I used it to message friends…that`s it. I decided to just call everyone now. So much easier.
Ari says:
Fri, 4th Nov 20112:17 am
Moderations is key in my opinion, I check Facebook about 3 times a day and I don't spend more than half an hour on it and instead I urge my friends to call me to talk instead of through social networks.. not sure if there is really a difference but it works well enough for me. I spend less time feeling bad for myself haha
Lorraine says:
Fri, 4th Nov 201111:21 am
I used to be one of the few who didn't have facebook, but I got it to keep in touch with my family, who lives several thousands of miles away (different continents), and with the friends I've made in school, but I don't seen anymore because we've moved and such. Also, I have it to keep updated with some pages, because if they have offers, they put them up on facebook.
I barely access facebook during the day, just loggin in for 5 minutes, to see if anything new is up. And I barely upload photos, or write anything on walls, or anything of the sort, so for me, it's a way of keeping in touch with my 30 contacts (12 are family), and uploads in certain pages
jess10210 says:
Sat, 5th Nov 20118:15 am
Yay I don't have one either and I love not having one… I do admit sometimes I miss having one but I figure anyone who won't text or call me to hang out isn't a real friend anyway. You shouldn't need a facebook to communicate. My boyfriend and I deleted ours because facebook causes TOO MUCH DRAMA. According to recent studies, a lot of people have deleted theirs in the last year. Wayyyy happier without one. I was one of those people who thought I'd DIE without a facebook so believe me, if I can delete mine, so can you. Once you get past the first week you're so much happier! Everyone should try deleting theirs
mick says:
Sun, 6th Nov 201112:23 am
I'd stopped using Facebook a while back because it was a total sh** show. Boring people trying to appear important, fun and noteworthy as though their life was an iPod commercial.
Carly says:
Sun, 6th Nov 201111:11 am
It's all about the balance, really. For me, I finally felt like I had achieved the balance when I deactivated my Wall. No more worrying about looking like a lame-o if it's been 3 days since someone had wrote on it (yeah, I'll admit that I actually did worry about stupid crap like that). I can still get invited to stuff, get in touch with people if I need to, document the occasional party through pictures. But I don't feel the need to prove to everyone that my life is action-packed and awesome. I'm happy with my life, and that's all that matters.
bj51sf says:
Sun, 6th Nov 20117:07 pm
I don't want Facebook lurking in my life and using the info for Big Brother crap.
sgmr says:
Tue, 8th Nov 20113:54 am
You aren't Facebook a so you can talk about why you aren't on Facebook, just like everyone under 40 who isn't on Facebook.
Bonafide says:
Tue, 8th Nov 20119:50 am
Awesome article Maura.. except for the "Fan us on Facebook" sign collegecandy articles have xD
laurenk723 says:
Tue, 8th Nov 20113:14 pm
i LOVE not having a facebook anymore! at the end of my freshman year in college, i had my roommate change my password to it so i could focus on finals. i realized i really enjoyed not wasting time on the site. i delayed reactivating it for as long as possible! when i finally did over the summer, i really did not like having it again. so i deactivated it for good and have not been on it since. when my birthday came a few months later, i discovered the handful of people who actually remembered when my birthday was and texted or called me to wish me. the number was under ten, so it makes you think about how dependent people are on facebook for their friends birthdays! i also didn't need the 200 wall posts from people i've never talked to.
i entered a new relationship during this time without a facebook and it was refreshing to not change my relationship status. all that mattered was that he and i knew that we were in relationship. our close friends and family learned directly from us. we didn't need to show it off to the world. we were happy enough on our own.
i also realized that facebook was such a negative environment for me. it made me focus so much on other people and their lives. what they look like, what they're doing, etc. i prefer to focus on my own life, not others.
lastly, facebook is SUCH an invasion of privacy! they have so many rights to knowing your location and such. it makes me uncomfortable. and they've changed the website so much in the past year that i barely even recognize it anymore! facebook was so unnecessary in my life and i'm so glad i got rid of it.
anyality says:
Fri, 11th Nov 20112:44 am
I mostly just keep my facebook because I want to know when people put up pictures of me. Other than that, I don't really use it.
That and I enjoy going through and deleting all the people I don't need.
Alexandra says:
Sat, 12th Nov 20118:11 am
I LOVE this post! I just recently deleted my Facebook permanently (Which I didn’t know was possible till my dad’s best friend told me how to and where to go). I was the type of person who would deactivate it for months, then reactivate it for stupid reasons. Eventually, I figured out by not having it my life was more peaceful and drama free.
My older sister and I both do not have Facebook and we always get made fun of by our friends. If I do not talk to you or see you on the regular then you do not need to know what I’m doing. I’m very weird about people knowing my business. Tome Facebook has become Internet stalking but that’s just my opinion.
bunny1 says:
Thu, 17th Nov 20114:34 am
I absolutely agree with you. This is how I feel everytime I get on FB and it's getting old. I deleted my account many times but have gotten myself back on it for different reasons. Now, I'm planning to stay out for good. I don't want to question why my BF won't accept my invitation to share the "in relationship with him" status. I was boggled as to why he never comment on my wall. I love my REAL LIFE relationship to let FB ruin it. I question why people ask me to be their FB friends but never say hello to me in real life. Well, I don't want to question any of that anymore. I'm happy with the way I am before FB came along.
matt says:
Thu, 17th Nov 20119:41 pm
I recently deleted my facebook. I had 800 friends, 750 of which I never hung out with anyway. Facebook is a waste of time, and since I have deleted it, I have spent more time with my girlfriend, more time at the gym, and like most of you should be doing, more time studying.
I used to have very low self esteem and no self confidence, and since I deleted my facebook, my GPA has shot up to a 3.6 (I am a Physics major) and I have gotten the internship of my dreams doing research at a laboratory for the Navy.
I may be in a different category because I don't go to parties, I don't drink, but I do like doing fun things that most people on facebook would find boring. Things like:
The free museums in DC
hiking
fishing
playing sports
video games
cooking
taking care of my new dog
studying
projects
educating myself in my own free time (I read a lot about WWII and Russia, etc when I am not doing science work)
spending time with grandparents (they wont be around forever)
doing volunteer work
etc.
facebook has really turned my generation into a bunch of idiots.
Anonymous says:
Sun, 20th Nov 20119:21 pm
Ugh, finally! I've never had a Facebook, and it makes me feel kind of bad in college. I signed up for a study to test an iPhone app, only to learn a Facebook was required in order to register. I signed up with a fake name (and fake email, and fake personal details_ and deactivated the account as soon as I was in. My boss has given me a hard time because all of the public policy applications he and his grad students want to test are Facebook-based. I'm an internet junkie, but I value my anonymity too much to subject myself to a website like Facebook. That, combined with my very common name, makes me next to impossible to find online, and I love it. It's freedom.
Fsck Twitbook! says:
Fri, 25th Nov 20118:27 pm
Good for you, Maura! Glad to see there are some folks who aren’t part of the flock of sheeple. (I prefer Flock of Seagulls, but I digress.)
As for me, sadly, I’m pretty much a loner in real life, always have been, and like Stan’s unwittingly-Luddite protege on South Park, “I have 0 friends.” That includes online and offline — it’s basically me, and no one else. Thus, I have absolutely no use for Facebook, no practical one anyway. I don’t even have any family to speak of…or that are worth even talking about.
But the other thing that bothers me, not about being solitary but about social media and the Internet in general, is the privacy issue. Facebook, Twitter, Google, etc., have no qualms about selling your private info to advertisers and telemarketing companies, and turning you over to Big Brother if you’re deemed a terrorist threat to copyright laws. (Seriously, there are people threatening to blow us all up, there are billions around the world out of work and starving, and stupid Congress is more concerned with prosecuting someone who posts a link to some DVDRip on their blog or Facebook?)
The other part of that is how people — Facebook users primarily — willingly share their personal information with anyone and everyone; we live in such a “TMI” culture that not sharing every detail of your personal life minute by minute is considered rude. I don’t even use my real name when commenting on blogs like this one. So I don’t see the point in sharing what I’m eating, wearing, doing in the bathroom, or why “In the can, going #2″ gets 500 “likes” from people online. Problem is, more and more it’s becoming impossible to declare one’s opinion or contribute content in cyberspace without “Logging In Via Facebook.” The non-users are effectively silenced, and the “linkers” once again open another door to data mining — thank the digital gods for things like OpenID and Disqus, and that some sites still offer this.
Oh, and by the way, I hope I’m not the only one who realizes the bitter irony of Markzilla Suckerbird’s year of birth being none other than 1984.
Bob says:
Sat, 26th Nov 20114:13 pm
Don't have it. Never will.
I got over this little craze years back when everyone had a homepage. Someone mentioned moderation is the key, then mentioned they check it three times a day.
That made me laugh.
However, you certainly are viewed with suspicion if you don't have one. I always find that kinda funny.
bob says:
Sat, 26th Nov 20114:15 pm
Hey, and ease off the profanity filters, kids, s u s p i c i on shouldn't be scary.
frochick54 says:
Sat, 17th Dec 20112:22 am
You posting this article means so much more than you know! For me, Facebook was a source of so much pain and anxiety. I became extremely conscious over the having less picture comments and friends. And then I was constantly being reminded of the people that caused drama in my life. Facebook definitely has some positive sides but it just wasn't for me. I am so much happier without one.
Cass says:
Sat, 24th Dec 20115:52 pm
I used to be wicked addicted to Facebook; I would check it when I got up, in between classes, getting home after being out, all the time; and finally I decided to delete it. I actually tried to delete it a couple times before finally deleting , but logged in before the two weeks was up)….then I just decided that that was it, and I let the two weeks go by; almost a year later now and I'm so much happier without it.
I'm on the more shy-quiet side so Facebook wasn't really boosting my self-esteem. I also feel like people don't have real conversations with each other when FB is involved…they like/comment on a status and that's good for the week. I just go tired of everything. I much rather have a face-to-face conversation with someone and actually do something than talk online.
chris says:
Wed, 4th Jan 20121:03 am
omg i love you… i dont have that bookmyface spacebook junk either. i cant believe you found 5 under 20. i dont believe i know any. we should make http://www.idonthavefacebook.com social network
ron says:
Thu, 19th Jan 20122:33 am
I had one for a while, got bored with it. Deactivated it. Don't miss it!
Ron says:
Thu, 19th Jan 20122:35 am
Thank you for allowing me to post without having to register…I Love You!
patricio 1 says:
Thu, 26th Jan 20123:52 am
Well, I also am the only in my generation, group of friends, family, except my parents and one aunt that do not have a facebook account. And people cannot believe that someone as sociable and popular as I have been all my life and more even now do not want to have a facebook account. Very simple for me.
For one, I like real human connections. I value the great friends and family connections I have made. And because in real human time I do not have enough time as I would like to care for this relationships as I would like. Time is not enough for me. Why would I want to spend the limited quality time that I have for my real and important personal relations (because of work, graduate studies, etc), making, re-making and culturing relationships
with other and more people that I would not be or want to see besides the virtual world of facebook.
I am an attorney and I value the right of privacy very much. It took us thousands of years to get where we are. And I strongly believe that if one gives up your privacy (just to be part of the hype) one does not deserve the right to ones privacy. Let's stand for it.
imbetteronmyway says:
Sat, 28th Jan 20126:54 pm
I know you hate reading long comments but read it, and I know I may write some stupid things but its because I have lots of things to say, so its hard to shorten. Whatever, One got my attention, its saying, I should be on fb cause everything about life, news are on it!
Victim. Life is your life not others. If your not on it the worlds not on it, because you were born alone and will die alone eighter. You don’t need to be on fb to get some acts that nonsence people doing. Im saying nonsence because if your here that means your bored or you have some not-proved-yet probs about it, that means your not happy about your fb friends. Then just realize that you don’t need more than 2 real friends, fb friends will just fade away, maybe fading your precious teen years with them too. Get your own life.
If your there to share what “you are” doing, then your still a victim. Because your life depends on others comments about your acts. Im sure facebook and twitter will be forgotten just as myspace too, so I’m cool about how I’m not into them, the only thing I’m sunhappy about is I hate wasting my time even thinking how stupid they are, usually I dream about how people were happy in 70s 80s 90s with their friends, only this can show internet is not improving the relationships. Fail.
Andy Oliver says:
Tue, 31st Jan 20124:56 am
Nice article. I think not having a Facebook account etc is great. People shouild have mystery in their lives, you don't want to find everything about them in 5 minutes from their social media sites. I've never had anything to do with these sites and my social life is great, it hasn't impacted on me one iota.
Jenna says:
Thu, 2nd Feb 20127:54 am
Seriously, after a while all the shallow drama and vain comments gets so old & boring. I honestly felt liberated when I deleted mine.
Happy123 says:
Thu, 2nd Feb 20128:54 am
Make me the 6th person you know under 20 which doesn't have a Facebook account . =D
Facebook in the first place isn't my thing.
But it's true that it's really inconvenient to not have a Facebook account.
My teachers post notes and important stuff on Facebook, which is really stupid.
They expect each and every one of their students to have Facebook?
It's like they encourage their students to have Facebook.
Man, I view that as an Irony.
You want good results from your students yet you're asking them to go on Facebook so often.
I like seeing other people's responses when I say " I don't have a Facebook" .
It's the same typical "WHAT?! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT" face. (Yay~ I'm a rare species~~)
And as I've always predicted, their next line would be "Why??? You should go create one!" xD
JEP says:
Mon, 6th Feb 201210:35 pm
Ahh I deactivated my Facebook this morning. I feel like I'm trying to quit smoking or something. I hope this works! Imagine all the activities I'll have time for!
Seriously, keep posting stuff about why not to have Facebook. I desperately need the encouragement!
Fine Chopper says:
Sun, 12th Feb 20129:47 am
My account was finally deleted last week, although apparently, anything I have ever posted will still be stored on their servers for years. Good thing I was never a facebook-holic. I posted very few photos and basically just used it to message with the friends who use it. Then I got tired. Why am I messaging with people who prefer using facebook to sms/txts or email? I got rid of it and if people want to talk to me, they don't need facebok to do it.
I still get the odd looks when I say I don't have facebook anymore.
"oh, why have you temporarily deactivated the account?"
"no, see… I deleted it. Gone. No more facebook."
yousetmefree says:
Sun, 19th Feb 201211:38 pm
Thank you,thank you
Jenny says:
Tue, 21st Feb 20123:41 pm
Hey Sweetheart! Damn you my soul sister! LOL, I just think like you, im 15 and Im one of the few people who dont have a facebook, well I have friends and I prefer real life unstead being someone´s friend on fb, I don´t hate it I just think it´s like a popular competition and It hasn´t any privacy in my opinion, your life is on the web and for me that´s a bit scary…there are other ways to comunicate such as a cell, skype, msn, or real life.
Jennifer says:
Fri, 2nd Mar 20121:07 pm
I wrote a similar post on my blog, and couldn’t agree with you more! I realized my pitfalls of uploading almost every picture of my son, all the drama others create, and how dependent I was becoming on the site. I’m glad to know other people see it, too!
Jennifer
softlyspokenoutloud.blogspot.com
tana says:
Mon, 5th Mar 20121:51 pm
I am lazy. I constantly wish I were skinnier, prettier, smarter, cooler and better than everyone else, but, I sit on my fat lazy ass on facebook all day. My fiance cheats on me but I don’t know it, because I am worthless to my own family, as I am to myself. Denial is key. When I go to the bar, (which is twice a week) I act like I am better than everyone, even though I dont work, dont contrbute to my family, and don’t have a personality. I treat everyone like shit, but they have no clue, pretending to be their friends, so I can stalk them on the internet. This way, I can demand money from my hard working boyfriend to buy the clothes I see other girls wearing. So, to re-cap… I do nothing and am better than you. My poor, poor neglected fiance and child. (I’m obviously better than my son, who has no manners, doesn’t know how to behave at other people’s houses, eats garbage all day and whines like a fuckin baby.) Yeah. Way better.
Lacey says:
Thu, 8th Mar 201211:33 pm
I totally agree with you. I cant even hang out with my friends without them checking Facebook on their phones ever few minutes. It's so annoying!
CLK35 says:
Tue, 13th Mar 201210:30 am
What I hate about Facebook is that some applications in business or otherwise require you to have it. I just get on the phone and make a call instead. That normally works better anyhow. My friends all have it, but really, I don't see the point. The thing to do is sign up with a fake name and then you have access without really putting yourself at risk. I cannot believe the people, old and young, who put on there that they "are going on vacation so-and-so date and will be back in two weeks..Or, 'hey, I'm at the gym all afternoon"……….Ok, so then, if I'm a bad guy or stalker, I'm either following you or breaking in your house. Not cool. And then there's the mindless people with their iphones constantly glued to it, forgetting about any type of productivity or interaction, walking down the street…OK, again, bad guy could follow you home, you morons…I don't care if your kids are in sports or what kind of car you drive. …Get off Facebook and get a real life…….I'm Facebook free and proud of it. My real friends know how to reach me.
Kevin says:
Mon, 19th Mar 20123:59 am
I'm 21. from san jose california and I don't have a facebook and never plan to use it in my lifetime.
Nikhil says:
Mon, 19th Mar 20127:19 pm
Hey, I really like this article as I myself do not have a facebook account but once used to use it excessively. I made the decision to delete it as I did not want to be defined by a website and that was the direction society was pushing me to. I also realized it is not vital to keep in contact with EVERY single person in your life. Some people are meant to be transient. It is foolish to attempt to hold on to everything. Networking is meeting the right people , not just many people. I think facebook subconsciously loads clutter onto one's mind. Why do I need to know if person A is wishing person C happy birthday? I have more clarity in my mind ever since i made this decision 10 months ago. I have never regretted it.
Buck Bradley says:
Wed, 21st Mar 20122:20 pm
Don't miss junior high school.
Don't have a facebook account.
Problem solved!
Buck Bradley says:
Wed, 21st Mar 20122:20 pm
How about in the next lifetime?
Kate says:
Wed, 28th Mar 20127:05 am
Nice to find another with the same views as me! I spent a few months on Facebook and had amassed hundreds of 'friends' in no time. I did not wish to reconnect with this people, but accepted them anyway. I just found the whole thing to be incredibly superficial, my real friends were putting forward an image of something they are not. I know the feeling of being asked for your Facebook in a lecture all too well, but many people actually commend my decision when I explain why I choose not to have a profile. I really do value my privacy, and embrace more traditional forms of communication. My friends mean the world to me and we all meet up on a regular basis. Facebook is not a necessary communication tool as many have been conned into thinking. I love college and love my friends, I have a great dislike for Facebook and its pervasion in society and choose to remain off the grid – living in the real world with real experiences.
Melissa says:
Tue, 3rd Apr 20128:01 pm
I am soooo happy to see many without facebook accounts!! I was addicted too….I was tired of reading facebook friends post, but in real life I would just say a "hi". Out of all the friends I talked to 5 on a weekly basis! I was beggining to feel like if I was weird for not having my account anymore. We are more than normal, we are social!!
MannyV says:
Thu, 5th Apr 20123:39 pm
What a refreshing article. I will admit I did the "myspace thing" a while ago. The DAY i started dating my girlfriend, I quit using it, never had facebook either. (She didnt either-we were 20 and 21 at the time, both in college). We recently broke up and I will admit I am tempted to get a facebook, not to creep but because I have some more free time, I'd like to get back in touch with some friends.
Maura kind of nailed it-there's nothing wrong with having a facebook, nothing wrond with using it as a tool to keep up with friends you may not normally see or talk to so often. I think it's when people use it not as a tool but as a complete substitute to human interaction, that it becomes sad. Stalking, stalking, uploading, posting, update, update, it gets annoying.
I have a busy life as do a lot of my friends. Work, plus school, plus homework and other projects-easily 70+ hours a week, so for me it is hard to have a social life. I don't have a huge amount of friends but I'm perfectly fine with that. I'd rather have 3 or 4 good friends that I normally talk to, keep up with, and hang out with, than 200,400,600+ friends. It's lame. If adding someone on FB leads to great friendship(in person), then great. But when I had a myspace, i feel like people would add me, either old friends or whatever, we'd say hi on the website back and forth for a bit, then they'd stay in your back pocket. That won't happen again. Even if I do get a facebook, I know what I like, I know what's right for me, human interaction always comes first. Pokes, likes, adds, deletes, and tweets will ALWAYS come second
Teresa says:
Tue, 17th Apr 20128:16 pm
Thanks so much… I deleted my Facebook about two days ago and it feels great. I wanted to use it just to let my friends see my videos and stuff… But then I started checking it so much it was out of control. I hated it, but I couldn't bring myself off of it. Fortunately, with enough irritating drama and misunderstandings and fights with people who took my the wrong way, I finally deleted that sucker! And I'm not regretting anything. Now I don't have to waste my time, and my REAL friends can email me, call me, or talk to me at school! I didn't lose one thing. It's nice to see people who think the same way.
Mtl says:
Thu, 3rd May 20126:43 am
I left facebook today, because i think it takes away the mystery of meeting people ! A few simple clicks and you know what they have done and your motivating to contact them or see them is gone. And how can you miss someone if you see them all day on facebook ? It looks like facebook is connecting people, but my opiniun is that is only disconnecting people in a sort of way. And also its a lot harder to let go of the past with some people, guz there still around and that makes its harder to really let go. Since i left, I feel a bit relieved. No more useless information or people I don’t see anymore. No more illusive friends who i really don’t care about. No more thinking should I post this on facebook or not. And its feel like I have a lote more privacy even I didn’t put to much on facebook. You really get abosorbed with that stupid facebook. From now one I make my commucation really worth it and more interresting and less shallow. Not the illusion of communicating. I really want to connect with people face to face, not digital.