He Said/She Said: Does Technology Make Cheating Easier?

God bless smartphones and Facebook. Where would our stalking abilities be today without those two? When our friends want to set us up with their hot friend, what’s the first question we ask? First and last name please! First impressions are no longer made in person, they happen through the Internet. Sad? Eh, maybe. But hey, much easier to weed ‘em out that way! If there’s zero potential for attraction or if the guy has “strip clubs” topping his list of interests, all I’m saying is that checking out his profile may save you from one miserable first date.

It’s obvious that technology makes the courting process easier, too. Being newly single for the past month, I’ve realized that every guy who has asked me out so far starts with Facebook. They send a message, we chat for a bit, they ask for my number, the messaging moves to texts and then finally we meet face-to-face. It may be a little depressing that a good ‘ol fashion, “Hi, would you like to go on a date with me?” is now considered creepy rather than endearing, but at least we’ve got some form of courting taking place these days!

But once you’re actually in a relationship, does technology make waves for the pair? I’ve known couples where neither have a Facebook so that the other doesn’t have to wonder if someone’s exchanging secret messages with a mysterious third. But even if there’s no social networking involved, smartphones have optional pass-codes where the phone owner must enter a password in order to unlock the phone. So unless neither have iPhones or social networking accounts, I’m going to put it out there that technology can make cheating easier.

Sure, it’s easy to creep on the girl who posted on your boyfriend’s wall, but unless he shares his login information with you, you’ll never know if messages have been swapped. The same goes for phones. If you aren’t given his pass-code, chances are he might be texting someone else. The same goes for girls with pass-codes and login information, too. There’s a simple solution to both scenarios, though; allow each other to know both sets of information or trust that both are faithful and leave it at that. The downside to the former is that one person might be inclined to check more often than the other and that can worsen trust in the relationship. Then again, if one partner doesn’t want to exchange user information, the other is going to question their trust regardless.

Another reason technology can make cheating easier is by throwing a public label out there. I’ve known guys in the past who had girlfriends but wouldn’t go “FBO” (Facebook official) because they wanted other girls to think they were single. Yep, red flag! Yes, the guy is a douchelord, but the girl obviously isn’t the brightest if she’s not questioning his motive behind that one. I know not all couples broadcast their relationships, but in today’s world where social media has become the norm, it’s definitely safe to wonder why a significant other won’t.

As with phones, the last guy I dated had a codename for his ex-girlfriend. He let me know the pass-code to his phone but probably thought I wouldn’t figure the name thing out. Wrong! He told me he had stopped talking to her, but I had a feeling he wasn’t quite telling me the truth. Should I have been snooping through his phone in the first place? The best answer I can give is no, but since there was a lot of reasonable doubt in my mind, it was justified. In my situation, what I found definitely helped me break away from him. But the bottom line is that if you trust your boyfriend or girlfriend, there’s no reason to go through their stuff, it’s as simple as that.

The tricky thing about technology is that “delete” is always an option. So whether or not cheating is taking place, it’s possible that the evidence can disappear within seconds of the exchange. My only advice is to go with your gut instinct. If you feel like he’s a cheating bastard, chances are he just might be! Or if you feel like she’s seeing another dude, it’s a definite possibility! It’s always good to be aware, but if you’ve been given no reason to question their technology devices (and trust), don’t go there, it’s more trouble than it’s worth.

Wanna see what He Says about cheating and technology? Head on over to COED!



    1. […] enter a password in order to unlock the phone. So unless neither have iPhones or social networking [Read More] […]

    2. Gina Farmer says:

      From my past experiences, yes cheating is made easier by mobile phones. My last boyfriend also used a codename to hide his other girl from me on his phone. Good thing it is possible to trace a number through the internet. So for those who doubt their spouse, one word of advice for you. "Internet"

    3. […] He Said/She Said – Does Technology Make Cheating Easier? […]

    4. Maura - Rider University says:

      Cheating is made way easier by today's technology, but it's also easier to get caught! It isn't hard to stalk a guy's facebook, hack into his email, or read his texts.

      1. Anna says:

        Yeah there's kind of a blurry line. Like, if your boyfriend leaves his phone out and you see a text from a girl. Do you look?

      2. Jackie says:

        The moral person in me says no. The real me says hell yeah. If I see a random name pop up on his phone, I'm definitely taking a stealth look.

    5. Brittany says:

      I feel like it can be harder to get away with. I hooked up with this guy and after talking he had asked me out. When I finally got around to stalking his Facebook I found out he had a girlfriend. I guess he planned on never becoming Facebook friends and let's be real that wouldn't work. I wish I'd creeped on his profile a lot sooner!

    6. Anon says:

      This article is stupid. First of all, unless you have VALID reason to believe that he's cheating on you-and not wanting to make your relationship Facebook official is NOT valid reason- you should trust the man until he gives you reason to do otherwise. And I'm talking in person, in your face reason, not "He didn't call on Tuesday and his Facebook status said I'm thinking of someone special, but he didn't call so it must mean he's cheating" type reasoning. Be woman enough to talk to the man in person like an adult, instead of stalking 5 different media channels like a coward. Secondly, I don't care how much I love or trust someone, I would NOT give them my login information, no matter what. If I wouldn't even give my mother my FB password, I sure as hell wouldn't give that info to some guy that I don't know. You do not need to know EVERYTHING about a person when you are dating them! Just because they like to keep some things private does not mean they are cheating on you or don't trust you. There are just certain things that he does NOT need to know. If you wouldn't want him reading your diary or knowing your PIN, why give him your FB information or cell passcode so he can spy on what you texting your mom or messaging your girlfriends?

      1. Maura - Rider University says:

        I agree with you that you don't need to give your login info to anybody, or that you shouldn't have to stalk anyone, but to me it's a red flag if the guy refuses to make it facebook official. I know a girl who has been dating a guy for years but hides their relationship status from everyone at her college so guys don't know she has a boyfriend. If you don't want others to know about your boyfriend/girlfriend, then you probably have something to hide.

    7. […] • Technology makes cheating easier? (College Candy) […]

    8. […] • Technology makes cheating easier? (College Candy) […]

    9. […] Does Technology make cheating easier: […]

    10. obama says:

      Tiger woods goes hard.

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