Kobe Bryant’s Wife Files For Divorce, Joins Most Necessary Breakups Of 2011
Finally, a headline we’ve been waiting for since 2003: Vanessa Bryant has filed for divorce from Kobe Bryant! Like countless other celebrity/California divorces, she cited “irreconcilable differences.” Also known as “you cheated on me one too many times, so I stayed with you through all your court trials and championships so that I could get my half of it all in 2011.” Yep, the Laker who plays for $25 million per year (and counting) did not have a freakin’ prenup. Maybe that’s not something you really think about when you get engaged six months after meeting on a music video shoot.
More power to you, Vanessa! Keep your head held high, and put your fist up in the air — you know, the one with that 8-carat purple diamond ring on it that’s worth $4 million alone. Collect your spousal support, take care of Natalia and Gianna and enjoy the fabulously single life, because your divorce is one of the Most Necessary Breakups of 2011 (well, in general, really)…congratulations!
Who else made the list? You know, all those whose headlines kinda made you smile with relief and gave you hope in humanity again. Let me refresh your memory…
Who else thankfully called it quits? And who do you think still needs to? Hey, the year isn’t over yet, there’s still a chance they’ll come to their senses!
Ashley is a UC San Diego grad who is holding on way too tightly to a potential career in magazines and goes to Vegas all too often. She’s fascinated with celebrities and strawberry beer and doubles as a pathological texter/emailer/blogger. Feed the addiction with tweets @cashleelee. Thanks in advance.