The Five Scariest Facts About Pregnancy

January 15, 2012     Posted in Body


By Liz

As if 16 & Pregnant and my 7th grade health class didn’t give me enough reasons to never produce offspring, turns out there’s a bunch of other aspects of pregnancy that scare the hell out of me. Maybe I’m biased since I’ve never had much of an interest in having kids, but just consider this a fair warning from one female to another: if you don’t want to deal with the following, not to mention the actual raising of a human child, USE PROTECTION. Moving on.

1) Morning Sickness

One of the first things many think of when they hear the word “pregnancy” is morning sickness. “Oh, that’s nothing,” you may say. “I spent a whole night vomiting after Bobby’s house party, I can deal with a morning or two.” Oh, really? Morning sickness, which occurs in over half of all pregnant women and is often due to increased estrogen levels, doesn’t always stick to the morning. In fact, the nausea may last throughout the day and, in severe cases, excessive vomiting can lead to dehydration, weight loss, heartburn, flatulence and a host of other lovely side effects. This “extreme” morning sickness is called hyperemesis gravidarum and can land one in the hospital. Not so easy to deal with anymore, huh?

2) Diastasis recti

Diastasis recti is a separation between the left and right sides of the abdominal muscle during pregnancy. After you push that little rascal out, however, the walls stay separated, and what looks like a ridge runs down the middle of your belly (for the love of all that is holy, do not Google this image). In severe cases, if a woman becomes pregnant again, the outline of the uterus or fetus may appear to stick out of the stomach. I imagine it’s quite similar to that scene in Alien, but having no experience, I can’t be sure.

3) Incontinence

Incontinence (otherwise known as involuntarily peeing yourself) and pregnancy go hand-in-hand. The adorable bun growing in your oven unfortunately applies increasing pressure to your bladder. One inopportune sneeze and someone’s gonna have some cleaning up to do. However, hope is not lost! Turns out Kegel exercises (basically crunches for your lady bits) can help control leakage. So should you ever have trouble with the plumbing down there, there is a solution. Just sayin’.

4) Weird Skin Changes 

I’m not talking about that “pregnancy glow” in which pregnant women apparently take on characteristics of a Twilight vampire. The skin changes I’m referring to aren’t so attractive (not that glowing is necessarily attractive, but I digress). One common condition is chloasma. This occurs in 50-75% of pregnant women and is caused by increased melanin in the skin, which basically means you develop brown and/or yellowy patches, usually on your face. There is also an increased likelihood of spider veins and skin tags, as well as the development of acne because of the extra hormones now coursing through your body. As if this wasn’t enough to make you appear like you roam the bowels of an opera house (Phantom of the Opera anyone?), around one percent of pregnant women also develop PUPPS: that is, pruritic urticarial papules and plaques of pregnancy. Basically, these are itchy, red patches on the thighs, butt, abdomen and other extremities. Again, the faint of heart should not Google this.

5) Cheeseburger Crotch

Oh yeah. I went there. While I’m not sure if this is the correct medical terminology, “cheeseburger crotch” refers to a swelling of the vulva, which makes it appear as if you have stuffed a Big Mac into your panties. Cheeseburger crotch also comes with other wonderful side effects, such as itching, discharge and odor. Fabulous. Oddly enough, this term is safe to Google, but don’t say I didn’t warn you if you decide to explore.

In conclusion, ladies, pregnancy isn’t what they make it out to be in the movies. A bit of vomiting, some crying, maybe a little weight gain and then you get an adorable baby in the end. You can’t fool me, Hollywood! And now you readers won’t be fooled either. Be careful what you wish for.

Isabel is a sophomore at the University of Delaware. When not out unintentionally offending people, she enjoys the use of bad puns and a nice solo cup of whatever’s cheapest. Follow her inane tweets @IzzyAndTheJets.

154 Comments on "The Five Scariest Facts About Pregnancy"

  1. Colline says:
    Sun, 15th Jan 20124:18 pm 

    Pregancy is not all that scary – if you eat properly and exercise you will not have an horrific experience.

  2. Joyce says:
    Sun, 15th Jan 20124:51 pm 

    I didn't want to say this, but please, do not ever write another article ever again in your life, especially about pregnancy.

    This article sucks; its obvious you had never been prego. Ah, I barely gained any baby weight (mostly due to doing belly dancing while prego) and this is how I ended ten weeks after my pregnancy.
    http://img685.imageshack.us/img685/33/dsc2682z.jp…

    Yes, that is me…and I have a bratty little girl named Tesla.

    If you wanna see the complete, picture, email me @ this.is.joeychan@gmail.com

  3. Christy says:
    Sun, 15th Jan 201210:16 pm 

    I thought the same exact thing.. When I saw this on my Google reader, I thought "Didn't cracked already run this article?"

  4. Christy says:
    Sun, 15th Jan 201211:21 pm 

    This is kind of ridiculous. When I was pregnant, I only had morning sickness, and that was far from terrifying. My pregnancy was amazing- my skin was beautiful, my hair and nails were thicker, and all of the hormone changes actually made me happier. Please don't try to scare women away from pregnancy, it's a very beautiful thing.

  5. bethany says:
    Mon, 16th Jan 201212:56 am 

    Yes not everyone has a horrible pregnancy, but I think you guys are coming down a little harsh. I feel like this is less of a serious piece than it is what is supposed to be a slightly sarcastic. I highly doubt any of the writers of college candy were ever pregnant, and this maybe should have been posted in a different category but come on, she’s not admitting she’s a doctor. Saying she should never write another article is a bit ridiculous.

    As for the cracked article, yes they’re similar but how many different “terrifying” pregnancy facts are there? There’s bound to be similarities.

    It’s not a particularly good article but the bitchiness isn’t necessary imho

  6. thedeej says:
    Mon, 16th Jan 20121:22 am 

    Nice thigh fat Joyce. Makes me want to jerk off all over your pretentiously named daughter.

  7. Randall Nance says:
    Mon, 16th Jan 20129:46 am 

    Just because you dont want to have kids does not mean it gives you the right to scare other women into not having them. yes you have your own ideas but leave this subject alone because you will never win.

  8. TJ says:
    Mon, 16th Jan 201210:06 am 

    I myself had a terrible pregnancy which included many of these things but i was a pretty rare case. It does happen though so saying that you personally had a great pregnancy doesnt prove anything. It shouldve been noted that these are extreme and dont happen to everyonei

  9. Dicey says:
    Mon, 16th Jan 201212:06 pm 

    This was my first thought as well. Right down to the phrases used. I didn't realize the term "cheeseburger crotch" was so widely used in this sense…

  10. Joyce says:
    Tue, 17th Jan 20127:07 am 

    You wish it was fatty tissue…

  11. Allison says:
    Tue, 17th Jan 20129:26 am 

    All I want to say it that there are much worse things that can happen while pregnant. More terrifying than getting pregnant; atopic pregnancy where the embryo is growing inside the fallopian tube and causes you to not only abort the baby but also get your whole uterus removed, a miscarriage, or wait, a still born birth.
    These are the scariest things about pregnancy because of the emotional carnage that can happen from it
    These happen every day.
    CollegeCandy has written about the terrors of using birth control(thank you again Caitlin for sharing) but I think it's time to have some one write about being pregnant.

  12. Julia says:
    Wed, 18th Jan 201211:39 pm 

    Congratulations on your experience, but as with anything medical people should know all the risks. If you ever get a prescription for something minor it always comes with paperwork naming all side effects, even those that are rare, people want to know all the risks of any medical procedure or surgery, so why would someone suggest that a person should not be told risks of a huge life/body altering thing, be they scary or not. Obviously there is no such thing as 'informed consent' with pregnancy, but as with anything even though many people are fine, and though the risks may be less than 1% you should still know about them.

  13. samrah saeed says:
    Thu, 19th Jan 20125:11 pm 

    Good, Very informative article.Keep it up.

  14. lizaspinelli says:
    Thu, 19th Jan 20126:45 pm 

    http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&sa=X&e…

    I googled "cheeseburger crotch;" it's an actual term, even used by WebMD oddly enough…just sayin'. I got curious haha

  15. Masego says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20127:02 am 

    Dear every pregnancy is different and is not the same for all of us. I believe its not fair to scare women like that. I had a wonderful pregnancy 13years ago and one thing I would tell you is that all of us have different experiences about pregnancy. When I was pregnant my belly was not showing but I gave birth to a handsome angel.

    For your own info my mom when preg her belly became very big and my sister and aunt with swollen nose and feet but I never had those.

    There is a reason for all this. It is God’s doing and for a purpose we would never understand. Girls out there use protection and when you are ready have kids as many as you can

  16. ThatKrazy says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20121:31 pm 

    I'm so sick of the media treating pregnancy like some sort of horrible frightening thing. Just trust your bodies, ladies. Do what feels right, and if something feels off, talk to your OB/Gyn or your midwife. Don't listen to this sensationalist crap.

  17. ThatKrazy says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20121:39 pm 

    It's called an ectopic pregnancy, actually. Not every ectopic pregnancy results in a full historectomy either. Even if you have an ectopic pregnancy, you can get it taken care of and have normal pregnancies after. Scary, yes, but rare and not something to worry about. Basically if you have pelvic pain that won't go away and/or vaginal bleeding, especially if you may be pregnant, go to your doctor.

  18. ThatKrazy says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20121:43 pm 

    You can't reasonably compare pregnancy to medication. Including all possible side effects of pregnancy is like including all possible side effects of puberty. It's human. It's sometimes gross. The end result is usually worth it.

  19. pro choice says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20124:34 pm 

    if you dont like it then dont read it.

  20. pro choice says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20124:36 pm 

    pregnancy is discusting. and people are over popluating the earth. so i'm glad someone had the guts to post it. maybe people will decide to keep their legs closed.

  21. prochoice says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20124:39 pm 

    seriously? have as many kids as you can? yes lets promote the over population of the earth shall we?? and when your starving because the world is overpopulating and we begin to run out of resources it will be your fault for encouraging it. congrats. oh and when they have so many babies that they cant afford to pay for them. it will be your tax money that goes into helping them. :) as they continue opening their legs for more government assistance.

  22. your mom says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20124:42 pm 

    stop taking slutty pictures of your self prego.

  23. stfu says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20124:44 pm 

    pregnancy is not a beautiful thing. stop lying to yourself and the world please and thank you. we dont care about how your skin was beautiful. no one asked your opinion.

  24. pro choice says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20124:44 pm 

    pregnancy is discusting.

  25. proooo choiceeeeee says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20125:05 pm 

    For all the baby lovers on this page and what not noone asked for your opinion. If you dont like it don't read it, not ever body wants to reproduce like rats.and as it is i live in mississippi and we have the highest rate of teen pregnancy. I see pregnant girls every day. and its not a blessing. its a curse. your completely throwing your entire life away for a mistake. teen pregnancy is nothing beautiful. and when you say all pregnancy is beautiful your including all the teens that are prego. its not beautiful. its throwing your life away for something that's going to completely dispise you in their teenage years, and for something thats going to rip your heart out when you find out that they arent the sweet angel you thought they were. i think this is a great article and people should listen to it. stop over populating the earth humans! thankkk youuuu.

  26. proooo choiceeee says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20125:07 pm 

    extreme but not impossible.

  27. ashley says:
    Fri, 20th Jan 20129:07 pm 

    You're "pro-choice", you should support a woman's choice to have as many children as SHE wants. You're not pro-choice, you're anti-choice.

  28. ThatKrazy says:
    Sat, 21st Jan 20122:03 am 

    He's a troll. You saw how many times he misspelt "disgusting" right? It won't just be my tax money, but my time and my career that goes toward helping mothers, particularly those who have less resources.

  29. Mia says:
    Sat, 21st Jan 20125:29 pm 

    I think the point is that young women, who are in no way ready to have a child, are getting a glamorized view of it from the media. If a woman wants to get pregnant, there's no way an article is going to scare her off. Childbirth is a very serious decision, and one that is risky, but if women focused on the risks and pains, the human race would have died out years ago. I am 20 years old, and although my body is physically capable of bearing children, there is no way I want any right now. This article is just trying to shed light on something that is becoming a bit of an issue in today's world.

  30. S.M. says:
    Sat, 21st Jan 20128:13 pm 

    I have allergic reactions to estrogen and have life threatening asthma at 2 wks. past implantation, so it really is an individual thing. Pregnancy is deadly to me, and not to most. :p
    I get morning sickness monthly without pregnancy from the estrogen.

  31. C.B. says:
    Sat, 21st Jan 201211:25 pm 

    or maybe it could be someone else's take on the same topic. though some are covered in the cracked article, not all of it is. also, let's remember: it's collegecandy.com, not a published paper. get a grip.

  32. RRB says:
    Sat, 21st Jan 201211:31 pm 

    A to the MEN!

  33. Truth hurts says:
    Tue, 24th Jan 201211:02 pm 

    Nice plagiarism, and way to censor all the people calling you out on it.

  34. You suck says:
    Tue, 24th Jan 201211:03 pm 

    Who said anything about teens? I hate to break it to you, but people over the age of eighteen screw and breed every day. Too bad your mom did though.

  35. Tania says:
    Thu, 26th Jan 20127:06 am 

    The only true scariest facts about pregnancy are the following:
    a) Getting pregnant when you don't want to have a baby
    b) Not being able to get pregnant when you want to have a baby
    c) Having a miscarriage, whether you wanted the baby or not and
    d) Being a horrible parent, whether you wanted the baby or not

  36. phyllis says:
    Thu, 26th Jan 20129:20 am 

    The article is clearly tongue-in-cheek and to be taken with a sense of humor.

  37. chrisL says:
    Thu, 26th Jan 20121:22 pm 

    Everyone has a right to discuss their opinion about this subject! This is a democracy, after all…right? The repeated call for censure on both sides is sure disappointing. As with any endeavor, there are inherent risks to pregnancy…though things have gotten better with modern times: 100 years ago the mortality rate was around 50%, so a pregnancy was perhaps a bittersweet event for some.

    I didn't want kids for the longest time but changed my mind in my mid-thirties. There were several things that no one bothered to mention, and I am going to share, and you don't have to read any farther if you are squeamish.

    I had a great pregnancy, but it was hard to breath at around 8 months, when the baby got larger and was pressing on my lungs; and also my feet got very big and uncomfortable–I finally understood the phrase barefoot and pregnant! It was also hard to sleep.

    After the birth, I had my period for a whole month!!!! Yikes! Then, my belly was all stretched out and didn't look so great–it took the belly button a LONG time to get back inside, which totally bummed me out. I went from having a six-pack to having a baby belly and it's never been quite the same. I attribute this to my age–pregnancy is harder and more risky and your body doesn't bounce back like it might have at a much younger age. Also, energy levels are just lower when you are older, so that is another thing that might be easier when one is younger.

    That said, I would not have wanted to have my child any younger. I had many adventures and great experiences that made me a much better older parent. Don't ever kid yourself..a kid will absolutely change your life and take up MOST of your time for maybe15 years(I'm not there yet), if you are doing your job right. But what a job! I love my son more than anyone or anything in the world. He's the best thing I ever accomplished, and that is saying a lot. I stopped at one because that is a nice round number for me, and because of that whole overpopulation thing..and because when he is a teenager and needs some space, I will need to be getting back to my own projects and adventures.

    Long and short of it: absolutely don't have children if you don't want them OR if you don't have the time and resources they deserve. Don't worry about the body so much..that's just so, like, superficial. Plus, women's bodies were designed to do this, and you have great technology on your side if anything goes seriously wrong.

  38. spellingnazbackatyou says:
    Thu, 26th Jan 20121:59 pm 

    It's called a hysterectomy, actually.

  39. countNO says:
    Thu, 26th Jan 20122:02 pm 

    Your experience isn't every woman's experience.

  40. countkit says:
    Thu, 26th Jan 20122:15 pm 

    Wow. you're a fucking arsehole. also, "maybe people will decide to keep their legs closed' nice slut-shaming there! "pregnancy is discusting"? You must hate women… and pro choice? god. you give a bad name to the rest of us pro choicers. you seem like one who believes every woman should have an abortion which doesn't give them much of a choice, does it now 'pro choice'? such ignorance also, the strong desire to have children and to become a mother and to love a child does not care about such issues when it comes to pregnancy. women who really love and want children will not be scared by such things, probably welcome them if it means getting a beautiful child at the end. no matter how many times you post with your bullshit, it aint gonna change their minds

    BTW, it's spelt "disgusting"

  41. Fast Talker says:
    Sun, 29th Jan 201212:07 pm 

    I have had 3 children. The last one at the age of 42. I took care of myself, ate good food, not too much food, walked and exercised, got as much sleep as I could, and now, with 3 children ages 16, 12, and 7, I weight within 3 lbs of what I weighed prior to my first pregnancy. Each of my pregnancies was different, as each labor was different. I thank God that my children are healthy and growing. I could not have made it without God and a loving, fully supportive husband. You hear and read about all the horror stories of what could happen when pregnant. Most problems are brought about by bad decisions, poor choices. Some problems are out of our control. That is where God comes in, and good doctors. No need to fear.

  42. Ariel Nagi says:
    Wed, 1st Feb 20122:31 pm 

    i'm pregnant right now and while i must agree about the horrible morning sickness, not being able to eat ANYTHING and in fact losing weight instead of gaining which is a scary feeling, i have to say this article disappointments me. I understand the point behind it–sure, we are glamorizing teen pregnancy and pregnancy in general when we see celebs like Angelina Jolie look fab throughout her prego months and after–but i think the issue here is that we don't necessarily want to scare people from becoming pregnant. At the end of the day, it's worthwhile for what you get–the baby. Everything is not about us and our appearance. So this is contradictory in of itself because aren't we glamorizing the state of not being a mom for say, um, just keeping our beloved Hollywood inspired bodies? Bottom line, eat right, exercise, don't look at pregnancy as some disability that hinders you from doing this (unless there are complications, of course). Yea, I have a ton of acne now thanks to my sky high hormones, but pregnancy is NOT that serious or that scary. Not trying to knock the article because I understand some of it is reality, but that's not for everyone. Of course, everyone has a right to express their opinion but ladies please don't think is this scary. Women can handle anything–I mean, look at the crap we have to go through regardless! lol :-) (And read my blog too if you can for the latest on sex, love, relationships and all things women)

  43. Ariel Nagi says:
    Wed, 1st Feb 20122:34 pm 

    learn how to spell, idiot!

  44. Mother says:
    Fri, 3rd Feb 20125:04 pm 

    Obviously if you grow up with such negative ideas and fear of pregnancy and everything it implies, no wonder you end up with all sorts of rejection reactions from the body. I'm glad christy's comment gets more thumbs up though :)

  45. Jojo says:
    Sat, 4th Feb 20122:44 am 

    Obvious troll is obvious

  46. starstruck231 says:
    Mon, 6th Feb 201211:12 am 

    I think this is a great way to keep all the little tramps who are too young to have babies from having babies. Just read this. I'm 26 and will never have babies and this makes me feel a little better about it. :)

  47. Julia says:
    Tue, 7th Feb 20125:33 pm 

    You are the most ignorant person to write about pregnancy, I can’t believe this was published and how rude it is. I’m pregnant right now (31 weeks) and none of this is true if you take care of yourself. Grow up, you’re a terrible writer, get a good job because this writing career will not sustain you.

  48. Truth says:
    Tue, 7th Feb 20129:30 pm 

    The earth is overpopulated.

  49. Yeah says:
    Tue, 7th Feb 201210:48 pm 

    Fine then leave. I'm staying and am comfortable having more guests over.

  50. ... says:
    Wed, 8th Feb 20126:42 pm 

    Are you kidding? First, pregnancy is terrifying! That's how it should be – it's inherently risky. It remains something that has the potential to end very badly and that should scare every woman out there. If you're not at some level terrified by the concept of being pregnant and everything that could potentially go wrong then you probably haven't thought enough about it. That being said, the fact that it's terrifying and has inherent risks doesn't mean that it can't be something good. We need to continue to have a healthy respect for the negative, as well has the positive, aspects of pregnancy and childbirth.

    Second, you can't avoid a terrible pregnancy just by making sure you "eat properly and exercise". Some women do everything right, and, for some reason or other, the pregnancy still goes wrong. Pregnancy is a complicated process – there is no simple way to ensure that it won't be a bad experience (or even a dangerous one).

  51. Holly says:
    Thu, 9th Feb 201211:04 am 

    I hare articles that make pregnancy out to be terrifying and unatural. Its possibly THE MOST natural thing yoy can do!

  52. Lindsay says:
    Thu, 9th Feb 201211:51 am 

    I really thought this was going to be a intelligent article about things that could go wrong while pregnant. Not "Cheeseburger Crotch" WTF is that?! I think you made some of this shit up. You don't want to get pregnant and have MEANING in your life, that's fine, but you don't have to hate on women who choose to do so and get a few pimples. And enjoy life in your 70's when you have no one around to love and take care of you. No children or grandchildren to watch blossom. What a pathetic article! And some women try so hard to have children and aren't as lucky as others. This really pissed me off. How vain can you be? Ugh. Going to throw up now (and no, it's not morning sickness, I NEVER had it during my pregnancy)

  53. Lindsay says:
    Thu, 9th Feb 201211:54 am 

    Yes. I am pro-choice as well. Keep your rude ass opinion to yourself. I hate how ballsy people get online. I'm sure you wouldn't say that to someone's face. This is the circle of life. Ignorant

  54. poet says:
    Sat, 11th Feb 201212:18 pm 

    Wait, I was expecting stuff like "prolonged and painful labor and maybe having to get a c-section/take pain killers even though you may not want to", "people start policing you and claiming rights to your body wherever you go", "while you're giving birth people may disregard what you want and take away your entire agency", or dangerous complications (except for the dehydration-> hospital thing) but instead I get a bunch of the relatively normal changes to your body that can occur during pregnancy and that aren't really so dramatic because, hey, bodies are for *functioning* first and only then for *looking pretty*?! I want my money back.

  55. Elby says:
    Sat, 11th Feb 20129:03 pm 

    I can't give hate to this article. I can't even say it scared me, it is nice to know the POSSIBILITIES of what I might go through if I become pregnant. At least now I'll know what questions to ask an OBGYN if I ever have to. Thanks!

  56. Terman says:
    Sun, 12th Feb 20125:49 am 

    Anything that keeps smarmy, un-funny, white liberal chicks from reproducing has to be good for the world.

  57. Ellabear says:
    Sun, 12th Feb 201211:40 pm 

    Lol. Obviously, she's never been pregnant before; she has absolutely no idea what she's talking about. My mother has had five kids, me being the fourth. I happened to be an eight pound baby and I was the only one born at home, so there were some complications…but really. She's still beautiful as ever.

  58. Justin says:
    Mon, 13th Feb 201210:31 am 

    Well a sample size of 5 kids is totally scientifically sound – I mean there arent millions of babies born each year or anything.

  59. guest says:
    Mon, 13th Feb 20124:24 pm 

    I'm not saying I agree with her article, but saying women who don't have children have no meaning in their lives is incredibly rude and ignorant. Some woman just don't want children. I do, but I have lots of friends who don't. I would never call their lives meaningless because they made a different choice than I did.

  60. Liz says:
    Mon, 13th Feb 20126:10 pm 

    These are things that Might Possibly happen while pregnant, not things that are guaranteed to happen, so I think everyone should just calm down. There are positives and negatives to most things in life, and this article just so happens to focus on some of the negatives, but that's never going to stop women who really want children from having children, so don't get so mean and defensive.

  61. guest says:
    Tue, 14th Feb 201210:18 am 

    All they're saying is that anyone wanting to get pregnant has the right to know the risks.

  62. Emma says:
    Tue, 14th Feb 201210:59 am 

    Nonsense!

  63. levi says:
    Tue, 14th Feb 201211:08 am 

    seems to me the media glorifies pregnancy, certainly among "celebs". like we're experiencing a global population shortage and surplus of resources

  64. Billy Bob says:
    Tue, 14th Feb 20128:20 pm 

    Stop hating on this chick… she's cute and I totally want to bang her…. I'll use a rubber so she won't get pregnant….

  65. MoonCat9993 says:
    Wed, 15th Feb 201210:18 am 

    She totally plagiarized this article from cracked.com!

  66. Oubli says:
    Thu, 16th Feb 20126:25 am 

    The Five Scariest Facts About Pregnancy

    You could DIE.

    Your pregnancy could have terminal/incompatible with life abnormalities.

    You could have 4th degree tearing during delivery.

    You could develop pruritic urticarial papules and plaques or PUPPS.

    Did I mention you could DIE?

    i though this would be a real list of things that could horribly go wrong. Silly me.

  67. John says:
    Fri, 17th Feb 20121:36 am 

    1 of the best things about pregnancy (and carrying a baby to term and giving birth) it is shown to prevent breast cancer by aiding in causing the cells in the breast tissue to mature in preparation for milk production. Pretty cool.
    Plus pregnancy is actually good for your skin and hair, increases your metabolism and is a good opportunity to lose weight, after you give birth.
    Not as scary as some may have you think. May be interesting to find out where the negative info was supplied from and who was supplying it. I assume Planned Parenthood has interests that align with the writing of this article……

  68. Guest says:
    Fri, 17th Feb 20122:47 pm 

    My pregnancy sucked from beginning to end and both ate correctly and excercised (low impact-swimming) my morning sickness caused me to lose 20lbs my first five months. I was late to work so many times w/o knowledge of the FMLA policies (job railroaded me but thats another story for another day) having to pull ove to throw up bile, not even food bile, sucked. and you dont feel better after barfing you feel worse and most of the time those at home remedies didnt work. it hurts to breathe. i got dehydrated to the point of passing out twice and just carried water with me everywhere. month six and seven were good. felt pretty, wore my hot pants lol. then the pressure started and sleeping became nearly impossible with having to pee all the time, and having to got through the EFFORT of getting up to pee. then i found out i had preeclampsia my 38th week and was induced with went fine for about 8 cm until my blood pressure dropped to 98 and my babys to 74 and i thought i was dying and they had to do and emergency c-section. i credit modern medicine with saving my life. 50 yrs ago, i would prabably have been dead on the table. thats pregnancy reality. And women do die everyday.

  69. Guest says:
    Fri, 17th Feb 20122:49 pm 

    i agree. my pregnancy sucked and it will take about 10 yrs to forget but every pregnancy is different. im not going to say its awesome, but at the end of it all, at the VERY end. i wouldnt trade my daughter for the world. I'll just get a surrogate next time

  70. Diastasis recti says:
    Thu, 23rd Feb 20129:53 pm 

    First of all, where the hell are you getting your information from? Clearly, you have no idea what you are talking about I'd like to see some citations of sources! Diastasis recti, is extremely uncommon and its the separation of the RECTAL muscle not the abdominal muscle. Being that you have no experience yourself with pregnancy, I doubt you should be giving women advice about why NOT to become pregnant.

  71. Recti not Rectum says:
    Thu, 23rd Feb 201211:07 pm 

    Diastasis recti is a separation between the left and right side of the rectus abdominis muscle, which covers the front surface of the belly area. I got that information from the link provided. Which is the one she got her information from. Please educate yourself before you comment about anything else.

  72. Gitalyf says:
    Fri, 24th Feb 20122:33 am 

    This chick is a weirdo. I had four healthy kids, and I have no clue what she's talking about. In fact, pretty much everything she is saying seems like something that she dreamed up, perhaps she needs some experience in the pregnancy department, because my pregnancies were beautiful experiences. But with the way she's talking I would be a little nervous with her becoming a parent.

  73. ANNON says:
    Fri, 24th Feb 201210:04 pm 

    YOUR a FRIGGEN MORON. READ BEFORE you open you RIDICULOUS PIEHOLE….
    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH00025…

  74. sarahbw says:
    Sat, 25th Feb 20128:32 pm 

    You left out agony, and death

  75. Sarahbw says:
    Sat, 25th Feb 20128:36 pm 

    Honey, I had everything but number 5. Trust me, even a fairly normal pregnancy is hard on the body.

  76. sarabw says:
    Sat, 25th Feb 20128:42 pm 

    These are common….all very common. Some so common they are "normal"

    You want me to start listing truly awful and not quite rare things, I will…

  77. Sarahbw says:
    Sat, 25th Feb 20128:46 pm 

    WRONG. But good news, fistulae and a fourth perineal degree tears are seen with regularity as obstetric injuries!

  78. Sarahbw says:
    Sat, 25th Feb 20128:50 pm 

    There's apparently a lot about pregnancy you don't know. It can kill a woman, disable her, make her Ill, but even "normal" pregnancies can bring a woman's body to ruin. I mentioned I h

  79. sarahbw says:
    Sat, 25th Feb 20128:55 pm 

    I mentioned I had some of these very ordinary miseries… I also had triggered an auto immune problem, one manifestation of which was anterior uveitis. Every repeated episode causes scars that adhere the iris to the lens. It's not only painful, and temporarily Impairs vision, but increases the risk of glaucoma and sudden permanent blindness. Yay me. I'm not rare…pregnancy often exacerbates underlying illness or triggers autoimmune problems.

  80. Sarahbw says:
    Sat, 25th Feb 20128:59 pm 

    Nope, some of these problems are so very common and ordinary they aren't even considered complications; and all are common and ordinary.

  81. Stacey says:
    Sun, 26th Feb 20121:10 am 

    I'm 8 months along with baby number 2. this article is unrealistic. Try posting one about the five best things during pregnancy.I'll start. 5. Strangers are more polite and smile in passing. 4. No period during pregnancy or while breastfeeding 3.You can feel a baby playing in your belly or enduring a round of hiccups. 2.heightened senses make sex better, food taste better and rest is so enjoyable; 1. When the pregnancy is over you have a precious baby.
    The cheeseburger crotch reference was taken from a book called girlfriends guide to pregnancy by Jenny McCarthy.

  82. leen says:
    Sun, 26th Feb 20128:21 pm 

    First of all.. Thank god there are so many good reactions about pregnacy because seriously me myself am naif enough to believe all that would actually happen and that it would be bad for the baby. though when I read it would be the 5 scariest facts about pregnacy I was thinking about babies getting sick during pregnacy,miscarriages etc.

    And then again, when you're pregnant.. it could be me but.. I would really want to go through whatever for my baby.

  83. Ginny says:
    Sun, 26th Feb 201211:10 pm 

    I have a 5 month old son ad experienced none of these "side effects."

  84. A.N. says:
    Mon, 27th Feb 20125:21 pm 

    She's actually right on with some of these. Just because you didn't experience it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Jeez.

  85. A.N. says:
    Mon, 27th Feb 20125:24 pm 

    So morning sickness is caused by bad choices? Psh…

  86. Maria says:
    Tue, 28th Feb 20121:30 am 

    You know what, when my mom was pregnant of me and my sis (I have a twin) before, and during the pregnancy, she got chloasma/melasma. It's very noticeable. It CAN happen to anyone, so I don't think some people should say these facts are ridiculous.

  87. anon says:
    Tue, 28th Feb 20129:19 pm 

    She's not as far off as some of these comments would make one believe. I am currently 5 months pregnant and am just getting over morning sickness that started at 5 weeks. I also look like I just hit puberty with as much acne as I have developed. As far as the other 3 items the author listed, I have heard of all of them and none of these 5 are uncommon or unheard of. I resent the remark that "most problems are brought on by bad decisions and poor choices". I am a married 26 y/o and when I got pregnant I was at a healthy weight and BMI due to a healthy diet full of variety and regular exercise. These things can happen to anyone. Just because they don't happen to all doesn't mean they don't happen to some.

  88. banned4eva says:
    Thu, 1st Mar 201212:04 pm 

    that made no sense… who post pictures of themselves to strangers and brags about how hot they are and then fails to notice someone claiming to want to "jerkoff" on your daughter? self-absorbed much?

  89. banned4eva says:
    Fri, 2nd Mar 20123:42 am 

    I love the word smarmy! sums it up so well.

  90. kanika says:
    Sun, 4th Mar 201210:57 am 

    thanks for telling all tis,m 21 n will never lik to get preg,i love myself,author should also mention the distorted body shape aft preg,i have sen my aunts n elders sis,aft preg n birth geting fat,plumby from size 0,its scary..

  91. Delta Juliet says:
    Tue, 6th Mar 201212:18 pm 

    You should probably spend your time learning how to spell and formulate a complete sentence before you worry about having kids. Just a thought.

  92. katie fucking DUH says:
    Wed, 7th Mar 20127:41 pm 

    five words: over- population and wealth distribution. take a minute to think about this lovely world of ours, how mentally advanced most kids (and adults for that matter) are today, and ask youself if you honestly think the offspring of today and tomorrow are going to be thankful for being brought into this mess. to live is to suffer, that is an eternal truth. anyone with any common sense at all would choose to abort any would- be sufferers back to the peaceful, harmonious spirit realm if they were to get pregnant in this day and age, that's for fucking sure. stupid people say that doing so is selfish, what a hoot. what's selfish is someone forcing yet another innocent soul to put up with this spiritually sabotagizing world so that they can play parent for however long it tickles them and potentially feel like a "complete" person with a "meaningful" existence until they realize what a bunch of mind- numbing propaganda those concepts stem from.

  93. PersonwithUterus says:
    Fri, 9th Mar 20124:40 am 

    Hey John, until you have the pleasure of shooting a grapefruit out of your pee-hole, please kindly shut the hell up!

  94. Amanda says:
    Fri, 9th Mar 20128:04 am 

    I'm sorry, but wouldn't you rather women be *informed* about what they are getting into, if for no other reason than to prepare yourself for the POSSIBILITIES? That's not "scaring women away from pregnancy," it's empowering them to make more informed decisions. Nowhere does she say that all women suffer from these things, BTW. But wouldn't you be upset if you expected all those nice things you cited, and got the bad stuff instead? I can't speak for everyone, but I'd prefer to be pleasantly surprised than deal with unexpected setbacks on top of all the other stressful factors that come with being pregnant.

  95. GoGo says:
    Sat, 10th Mar 20128:06 pm 

    I love you. Seriously.

  96. Zestubou says:
    Mon, 12th Mar 20125:16 am 

    I completely agree with you.
    I'm not telling anyone to get an abortion but please stop having sex and if you do wear a freaking condom.
    There a tons of kids out there that need a family. GO ADOPT.

  97. MGB says:
    Mon, 12th Mar 20121:46 pm 

    Girls just want to give it to every guy

  98. NBY says:
    Mon, 12th Mar 20121:47 pm 

    Pregnancy sucks. It totally disfigures you

  99. Sherry says:
    Tue, 13th Mar 20124:07 am 

    I agree with Brandon… hahah this world is doomed forever, the everlasting age of everyone is wrong and "yall dont know me" is fucking retarded… stop having kids before you want to grow up yourself, thats the real solution…. for everyone who sits there and says having kids will ruin your body, youre all wrong, my mom has had 4 kids and still looks amazing so get off your asses and get to work!

  100. Justo says:
    Wed, 14th Mar 20129:21 am 

    All seem to have forgotten the scripture. This is not new and nobody there is inventing anything. If you are normal you will get pregnant and bear children the same way your mothers did. Are your mothers not well and healthy? Stop frightening people for the curse upon you may make it even harder on your side.

    serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.

    14 And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:

    15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.

    16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

    17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life;

    18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;

    19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.

    20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.

    21 Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of skins, and clothed them.

    22 And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever:

    23 Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken.

    24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.

  101. hippiemom says:
    Wed, 14th Mar 20122:40 pm 

    O Please, spare me your scripture! There are too many unwanted, hungry, abused children. People in China have the right idea: Rewards for the childless, and if you should unfortuneatley want a little one- ONE is all you get, choose wisely.

  102. hippiemom says:
    Wed, 14th Mar 20122:43 pm 

    your post makes me want to puke, and I certainly hope you NEVER have a child because you will raise it with the same ignorant intolerance you spout here. HAIL SATAN!

  103. hippiemom says:
    Wed, 14th Mar 20122:47 pm 

    I agree, pregnancy hurts, distorts your body, depletes your body and then you are stuck to some drone yelping whinning demanding thing for years on end. Morning sickness DOES last all day- People who think having children and being pregnant are a thing of beauty are probably some males who don't go through it and then don't stick around to raise the whelp. BIRTH CONTROL people, sterilization if you never plan to have any pups, and careful about the names, or you too can have a Frito!

  104. hippiemom says:
    Wed, 14th Mar 20122:49 pm 

    Lucky you, the 1% minority- all my friends puked, got pimples, aches and pains, stretch marks, anemia and some even got diabetes! Horay for you, little miss baby makin machine! Idiocraty here we come!

  105. Jane says:
    Thu, 15th Mar 20126:32 am 

    This post is just a proof, that some women are not ready to have children. That's all. If "morning sickness" and "body changes" outweights "new life", "motherhood" and "family" for the autor, I'm really sorry for her and for our generation.
    And as a fact, if you are not responsible enough to have children, than you are not old enough to have sex. It's not about pleasure only, it's also about reproduction. Laws of nature…

  106. Lover says:
    Thu, 15th Mar 20127:29 am 

    I'm grateful for competent ideas covered in your article. Saw few custom essays of such a top priority. Similar speech writing are not likely to be underestimated. I'm sure you've done a remarkably rewarding work.

  107. KKP says:
    Thu, 15th Mar 20123:29 pm 

    Someone should have not had you. Pro-Choice on you for sure :)

  108. Stud says:
    Sat, 17th Mar 20128:05 am 

    Scariest thing is cuckoldry.

  109. @Deezignerkid says:
    Sat, 17th Mar 20128:12 am 

    oh I'm already scared to death' so I might end up sitting on the side lines and watch my Sisters kids grow up..

  110. Erin Kaiser Mccullough says:
    Sat, 17th Mar 20123:08 pm 

    Nobody cares, Religioso. Stuff it.

  111. The Prophet says:
    Sat, 17th Mar 20128:01 pm 

    I hate to see those so misguided from the path of what is true and good.
    Do not let these Christian lies deceive and tempt you; the Flying Spaghetti Monster is the one and only God.

    May you all be touched by his noodly appendages.

  112. ThinkerBelle says:
    Sun, 18th Mar 201211:20 am 

    @katie fucking DUH — Your mama should have aborted you.

  113. Thinkerbell says:
    Sun, 18th Mar 201211:22 am 

    Your mama should have aborted you.

  114. madi says:
    Sun, 18th Mar 20121:59 pm 

    I only got sick THREE times total while pregnant. & i'm only 16, the only thing on this post I can even relate to is itchy, discharge, and hte pressure also cause small cuts on my vulva, it is not swollen or huge though. The worst thing about pregnancy is probably not being able to sleep on my stomach anymore. Seriously, don't write about something you have no idea about and haven't even experienced.

  115. YOUARESTUPID says:
    Sun, 18th Mar 20126:10 pm 

    Just because that was YOUR experience doesn't mean it was everyone else's.

  116. Jennifer says:
    Sun, 18th Mar 201211:35 pm 

    seriously pregnancy is meant for women who are willing to go through both the good and bad (and in some cases its an accident go figure). If she is determined to have a child then so be it. if she wants to be informed, then good for her. there is no need for ridiculous comments on the reason behind wanting to have a kid. its is OBVIOUS that every woman would have a different experience. while this article proves it's point on how complicated pregnancy is, it is unnecessary for people to lash out on something that does not involve you (especially if you do not want to have a kid). i'm 19 and have children is in my future with or without these complications. being informed is harmless but being attacked is simply retarded.

  117. auley says:
    Mon, 19th Mar 201212:28 pm 

    there is a huge domino effect in population restriction. often, animals on the endangered species list infamously get there by us thinking there are "too many". China's system is completely unsustainable, because almost everyone keeps a boy, so now they have to ship in brides from other countries. if this happened on a global scale, humanity would just… die off.

    procreation is natural. it should be responsible, but not banished.
    pregnancy is not a disease.

  118. menaremorons says:
    Mon, 19th Mar 20126:13 pm 

    And this comes from a man. LMFAO!!!!!!

  119. menaremorons says:
    Mon, 19th Mar 20126:14 pm 

    I agree!

  120. Candace says:
    Tue, 20th Mar 20126:20 pm 

    Interesting that the comments linking to the Cracked.com article this copies seem to have all been deleted. Also interesting to note that the complaints sent to College Candy linking to the original article and asking for credit to be given where credit is due have gone unanswered.

  121. Katie says:
    Tue, 20th Mar 201210:23 pm 

    If "morning sickness" and "body changes" outweighs "new life", "motherhood" and "family" for the author, I'm really sorry for her and for our generation.

    This seems contradictory. Of course there's people out there not ready to have children! Just because you're able to reproduce doesn't mean you should (or should want to). They might come to point in their life when they are ready, they might not. We can only hope that the people who are having children are those that feel *mostly* ready, and actually want to have, children.

  122. lily says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20121:54 pm 

    People need to stop getting pregnant.
    There are already too many idiots in the world.

    Nice article. it's something to think about.

  123. lil says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20121:56 pm 

    the author can post his opinion about whatever topic.
    if you dont like, dont read.

  124. nun ya says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20129:56 pm 

    i agree

  125. Nina says:
    Sun, 25th Mar 20122:41 am 

    Coming from a women who is a Mom, this article is 100% TRUE. You forgot the chance of hematoma while your vag is being ripped open. That’s a lovely, heartfelt experience. Give me a break ladies. Yes, if you take great care of yourself its not all bad. But even still, its not the fairy tale women make it out to be in their defense mode. You loose control of your body, and mind sometimes. Ya can’t argue that, one small example is that your vag will never be the same. No cream can rid of stretch marks 100%. Im happy with my ONE child. Besides, women have WAY TOO.MANY KIDS anyway. Can you really afford 3+ kids not only financially but TIME wise? Give them all 100% attention a kid deserves?

  126. Satya says:
    Sun, 25th Mar 201210:26 am 

    ur parents too have thought like that we'd had one idiot less.

  127. Nunu says:
    Mon, 26th Mar 20126:11 pm 

    I actually love your writing style, Isabela. You did an excellent job.

    Very real article. I’ve had many pregnant cousins and friends and what you’re saying is absolutely correct. There’s nothing so fabulous about pregnancy. All women just want the baby out, really. The skin discolouration never left my friend; she had to resort to harmful creams with lots of hydroquinine or whatever the skin lightening cream is called.

  128. Joanne says:
    Tue, 27th Mar 201212:48 am 

    Ah yes, and arresting and forcibly aborting pregnancies on women who dare have more than one child. No "rewards for the childless" per se, just severe punishments such as forced abortion and sterilization for those who don't obey the law. And that's saying nothing of the incredible disproportion of women to men, which will only lead to oppression of the women who ARE born in these societies.

    I assume from your screen name that you're a mom, and I would applaud you for that, quite frankly. But rewarding childless couples only leads to discrimination against those who do have children. Why is motherhood not revered in this culture as it should be? That is my opinion. We'd have a lot fewer problems in our society if we treated motherhood as the high calling that is is instead of treating mothers as being worthless. After all, we all have a mother, don't we?

  129. Joanne says:
    Tue, 27th Mar 201212:50 am 

    Whoever voted this down clearly didn't understand that you were being sarcastic. I like you. Thanks for saying what I was thinking.

  130. Joanne says:
    Tue, 27th Mar 201212:55 am 

    I read an interesting study a while back that showed that after women have babies, some of the fetal cells are left in the body(residual stem cells) that can actually heal their bodies later on. One of their test subjects was a woman who an older child and also had diabetes, and the fetal cells were attempting to work to repair her kidneys that were being ravaged by diabetes complications. It was fascinating.

    And anyone who says that pregnancy "can kill a woman" obviously isn't paying too much attention to what maternal mortality rates are in developed countries. They're extremely low and being pregnant is quite frankly a sign that your body is functioning normally. It's not a "disease" or a "tumor" or anything else people may call a developing fetus, and I feel that to suggest otherwise does a disservice to women who have children. Why are we allowed to discriminate against them? That's like telling your own mother that she should have just not had you, because it wasn't worth it anyway.

  131. shoresh says:
    Tue, 27th Mar 201212:02 pm 

    yea
    sex is very impotanat in life but women is agree sex is to hot

  132. RoseOfDesire says:
    Tue, 27th Mar 201211:32 pm 

    Dip shit? Really? Seems to me the author cited very real conditions that affect pregnant women. While the author expressed her opinion on having kids as unfavorable, it doesn't change the information that was presented, only how it was presented.

    Might I add, if the author is such a "fucking dip shit," (as you so succinctly put it) wouldn't you prefer she not have kids?

    Incidentally, she never said "Don't have kids." She said "Be careful what you wish for."

  133. ScopeThief says:
    Wed, 28th Mar 201212:52 am 

    Funny. There are so many people who complain about the opinions of others who see pregnancy as being less scary than it has been represented here. So if you don't like their comments, dont read. And don't hide behind that expression, like every other tool who refuses to accept that some people have different views on some topics. Don't get me wrong, I realize that this is human nature, to fear and dislike what does not look or think like you (and no, that is not meant to be condescending), but please just respect others' opinions.

  134. guest says:
    Wed, 28th Mar 201212:56 am 

    chill out! its voicing of an opinion, if you dont like it, leave this page.

  135. 11pagesofGs says:
    Wed, 28th Mar 201211:57 pm 

    Very interesting article. As someone who is already terrified of giving birth, this adds more to that. Although I do plan on having children one da.y I think that women who are ready to have children and who really want them don't care that much about this kind of stuff. Maybe some teenagers should read this for a reality check. There are so many dumb teen girls who want to give their unsuspecting boyfriends kids for their birthday or to keep (or should I say, TRAP) them. This sounds bad but in my communiy there were seven girls who did this. Their mothers brought them in to the hospital for birth control and the girls flat out refused it. Only a few of them actually had the kids but they thought it was like taking care of a doll. ugh.

  136. Brittnie says:
    Thu, 29th Mar 20123:51 pm 

    Realistically, these conditions occur. Secondly, why in the world are people writing offensive and inappropriate comments here? It's only a little article with real conditions that occur and seriously, with America having one of the highest youth (AKA teen) pregnancy rates in developed countries, don't you think we may want deterrents? I say give this article, along with a better sexual education course, to ALL high school freshman! Maybe those rates would decrease and their lives and bodies would not be potentially irrevocably changed!

  137. Devy says:
    Mon, 2nd Apr 20123:24 pm 

    You take the good with the bad when you have kids! I'm a mother of one.. and another on the way. You play you pay thats the way I look at it.. I agree I do not know why women BEG to go through this experience I do not enjoy it what so ever. You have the losing control of everything… Body and Mind… You start to cry over someone looking at your funny…. You start to get paranoid with "OMG am I gonna fall down the stairs?" Stretch marks well face it your tummy is gonna stretch what can you do about it. The skin thing.. I have to beg to differ on that one… I don't break out, I don't have pimples, I don't have those veins (unless they are in the back but who cares…) Such is life.. But to you ppl who are saying they are moms you have to agree with one thing…… The boobies are nice! (unless you have big ones then sucks to be you..) and when you get through that first tri… You seem to have more energy (at least I do..) You start to actually lose weight (i know I did..) even with eating everything in site! the morning sickness yea that sucks! Its just its all about the looks… Stretch marks… The Veins…. idk wtf is wrong with your cooters but mine is just fine… so those 2 little things cause ppl can see em… BOOHOOO who cares… this world is just stuck on looks nowadays everyone is suppose to be perfect!!! You had a kid… Your not perfect anymore…. lol

  138. anonymiss says:
    Mon, 2nd Apr 201210:02 pm 

    This is article is extremely similar to the Cracked article (http://www.cracked.com/article_19298_7-terrifying-things-they-dont-tell-you-about-pregnancy.html) which was written last year. Credit where credit is due, please.

  139. jenster127 says:
    Wed, 4th Apr 201210:04 pm 

    Giving birth is a natural part of life and a gift from God. I love my children and want more. My body looks great and my husband still loves it down south. Reading articles like this reminds me of why I should not read them. One thing is true, there are definitely idiots in the world including the one who wrote this article.

  140. SpeakNow says:
    Thu, 5th Apr 20123:51 am 

    Thank goodness I NEVER wanted KIDS, esp. if I had to friggin' CARRY them!! Pregnancy is a CRUEL joke on womyn! Many believe it's from GOD. Wrong! From where then? You figure it OUT!

  141. Sam Snarkowitz says:
    Thu, 5th Apr 20125:15 am 

    The number one scary thing SHOULD have been "You have a frickin' baby inside you!"

  142. Jacqueline S. Homan says:
    Thu, 5th Apr 20128:17 am 

    Not everything that's "natural" is great. And just because something is "only natural" doesn't mean it's NOT natural to want to AVOID it. F-5 tornadoes are natural. Does that mean we should all run head-first into one rather than take refuge in a storm cellar? Appendicitis is natural to the human condition. Letting it take its course without man-made UNNATURAL remedy = 30% chance of death from peritonitis.

  143. Rebekah says:
    Sun, 8th Apr 20127:26 pm 

    The condition of your body plays a strong role in how your body copes with pregnancy. Those who are really fit and healthy BEFORE they get pregnant tend not to suffer from the after-effects of Diastasis recti etc. nor have flabby stomachs for long after birth. Bad stretch-marks can often have a lasting effect for those women who start believing that because they have a baby inside them, they have to double their eating portions (2 x adult portions) which causes extra than normal weight gain, thus contributing to greater stretch-marks. My mother, aunts and friends never experienced these scary 'facts', apart from the morning sickness (which for most of them only lasted for the first few weeks) and weak bladder as they progressed through their pregnancies but never caused any serious inconvenience except a few extra toilet breaks. Maybe graduates should write such articles and not sophomores?

  144. derp says:
    Mon, 9th Apr 20127:12 pm 

    except that Cracked's article is funny and doesn't read as though a twelve year old wrote it.

  145. LadyJ says:
    Mon, 9th Apr 20129:49 pm 

    "To the woman he said, 'I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children.'" Genesis 3:16
    Yes, it's natural. Yes, children are a blessing from God. But we can't pretend it's all sunshine and daisies, either. If you're having a good pregnancy then congratulations! I'm super happy for you. Those do happen. But don't go pretending that ll pregnancies are like that.

  146. StillMag says:
    Mon, 9th Apr 20129:56 pm 

    Dude, I want to have kids, but I want to know what I'm getting into as well. Pregnancy is scary. It's scary and painful and disgusting, and that's just the way it is. Or to put it in your terms: Just because you can't conceive of women as anything other than baby-producing von Neumann machines does not mean it gives you the right to blind them to the facts.

  147. Bilbo says:
    Wed, 11th Apr 20122:11 pm 

    This is someones opinion. I dont think that the person who posted this article is trying to scare anyone into not having a baby. I someone really wants a baby then this article wont change their mind and if someone doesnt want to have kids then this article might have confirmed that feeling. So if people who love having kids can voice their opinion about the subject why cant people who dont want to have kids voice theirs?

  148. necrotrish says:
    Sun, 15th Apr 20122:15 am 

    Agreed Holly; also these are not facts, just a couple low percentage, random horror results if you DONT take care of yourself DURING your pregnancy.

    Your pregnancy conditions are results of your physical and mental health, lifestyle and environmental choices. Pregnancy is Natural, however, not everyone feels their body IS.

    I feel sorry for whoever wrote this article.. You should learn how to take care of yourself dear.. You sound like a patient that doesnt have the confidence to talk to your doctor about your body.. If your uterine muscles are as weak as this article.. please dont have any children. we've got enough anxiety, naivety, and obesity to deal with in the world..

    ~ signed by a certified Accupressure Specialist/Oriental Medicine JD

  149. Lauren @ T&G says:
    Sun, 15th Apr 201211:23 pm 

    Was this article written by a 15 year old boy? I am just embarrassed for the author who obviously did about five minutes of googling and zero minutes of thoughtful consideration to write this article. As a certified pregnant person who has had traumatic morning sickness, disguisting skin changes, and all sorts of gross stuff coming out of my vagina, let me tell you what's scary…

    Thinking about the last month and realizing you can remember every single time you pooped because your prenatal vitamins are so constipating. Also, realizing that your husband can remember too because it was such a big deal each time that you texted him "OMG I POOPED!!!!"

    There is nothing scary about pregnancy other than the fact that your baby's life is completely in your hands. Miscarriage is scary. Birth defects are scary. Being able to simultaneously drink water and pee at the same time is actually kind of a cool trick that you can brag about to your friends.

  150. Janine says:
    Tue, 17th Apr 20122:17 pm 

    Bottom line, if this list is enough to make you second-guess your desire to have kids, that's a good indicator that you should not get pregnant! I have and love my son, plan to get pregnant again soon, but I cannot even imagine going through all of it again if I wasn't actually ready to be a mother. And pregnancy is the EASY part. Best believe I was on birth control for almost 10 years before deciding to get knocked-up. Seriously, let's print out this article and make it a mandatory read at every high school. Shit, every middle school too.

  151. meladymarks says:
    Tue, 17th Apr 201211:18 pm 

    your thoughts become your reality. i choose to believe the opposite of what you write. life is suffering when you live out of alignment, which clearly you do. there are still a lot of us, mostly parents (i imagine) doing things right by the planet and by others for the sake of your childrens' future. we are the ones lifting the world up, while you try to tear it down with negativity.

  152. JP1 says:
    Thu, 19th Apr 201210:55 am 

    Is there some reason you haven't returned yourself to the "peaceful, harmonious spirit realm?"

  153. Stephanie says:
    Sun, 22nd Apr 20124:39 pm 

    I'm 30 weeks along and yeah, it's had it's moments but I can't wait to meet my daughter. And while I haven't had the poop issue, I've had a major gas issue, which is just as "special". I love being able to get my hubby to run from a room. lol

  154. youra says:
    Wed, 23rd May 201212:10 am 

    Your a moron

Tell us what you're thinking...