Glamour Says The Darndest Things: February Edition

January 24, 2012 12:00 pm     Posted in Entertainment, HaHa  Jasmine R. g+ page


By Jasmine R.

I’m obsessed with Rachel McAdams’ shorts on this month’s cover of Glamour. Sigh, I’m desperately longing for warm weather, pastels and the absence of layers. Thanks for rubbing it in, Glamour.

As the cover boasts, this is the “Guys & Sex” issue, and yes, it is just as redundant as it sounds (bonus points for featuring some of the hotties of Revenge though). This issue was peppered with all kinds of not-so-scandalous guy and sex facts that shouldn’t be shocking to anyone who is over the age of 15 — guys think about sex all the time, they masturbate at work, they love boobs and sometimes they lie to get us into bed. Unbelievable, no? A slightly more interesting article was the one in which men gave their opinions on some of the most common women’s hairstyles, and they are just as annoying and silly as you would think.

Glamour on top knots: The higher the hair, the more high strung a girl is.
Jasmine says: I firmly associate top knots with Britney Spears…on her sloppiest of days.

Glamour on side ponies: Side what? Is that a sex position?
Jasmine says: Yawn, making a sex joke just to make a sex joke is not clever.

Glamour on feather extensions: Gross: Gone fishing?
Jasmine says: But…fish don’t have feathers.

Glamour on ponytails: Something to hold onto when things get steamy.
Jasmine says: Not only does ponytail yanking sound juvenile and unsexy, but ouch, I can imagine guys getting way too gung-ho with the hair-pulling.

Glamour on redheads: They’re like the unicorns of women – except they actually do exist.
Jasmine says: And the attempts at humor get even lamer. *throws tomatoes*

Glamour on tan lines: If I can see them at dinner, hopefully I can see where they end later.
Jasmine says: Do tan lines even have a beginning or an end?

Glamour on pink streaks: For breast cancer awareness – hell yeah! For kicks, not so much.
Jasmine says: Eh, I agree. They’re too Avril Lavigne.

Glamour on hottest female celebrities: Never tell a woman anyone else is hotter than her.
Jasmine says: I could not trust a man who refuses to acknowledge that Rihanna is the hottest woman in the world.

4 Comments on "Glamour Says The Darndest Things: February Edition"

  1. bonkasaurus says:
    Tue, 24th Jan 201212:27 pm 

    they used to use feathers and stuff to make lures while fishing, hence the feather remark lol. I love Glamour! i wish I had a subscription but I already have like 10 other magazine subscriptions.

    -Bianca at http://theinbetweengirls.wordpress.com/

  2. Katie Garrity - North Central College says:
    Tue, 24th Jan 20124:20 pm 

    I am a redhead, and I have heard some of the most asinine jokes about the color of our hair. This one is pretty dumb.

  3. Lisa says:
    Tue, 24th Jan 20124:48 pm 

    Nerdy fact: fishing joke refers to the fact that feathers are used to lure fish (fly-fishing)

    I also want to add that i went to aschool with 90% boys, and last time we had a reunion, they kinda forgot that there where any girls present. One of the less offensive things a guy said was (refering to redheads): "If there is a rusty roof, the basement is soaked"… i haven't talked to that guy since
    (what happened to my nerdy guys… guess they grew up :( Just wanted to say, don't vorry about what guys say to each other, it might not be reflecting in their personality)

  4. Honey Badger says:
    Thu, 26th Jan 20126:55 am 

    While I agree with most of these, the last one.. meh. I don't want to hear how hot other women are, especially that they're more attractive than me. It makes me feel bad about myself. Maybe that's just me because I'm on the road to recovery from Body Dysmorphic Disorder, but I thought it was a fairly normal thing to not want to hear that sort of stuff. Same goes for men. I wouldn't tell my boyfriend that anyone was more attractive than him, but I guess that I don't really compare any other man to him physically.

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