Things That Michael Fassbender’s Penis Has Ruined

By Garnet Henderson – Columbia U

When the Oscar nominations come out every year, the biggest controversies usually revolve around the people who got snubbed, not those who actually got the nominations. This year, one of the biggest snubs was Michael Fassbender for Shame. He was nominated for a Critics’ Choice award and a Golden Globe, among others, but the Academy completely ignored him. Why? The LA Times thinks that Michael Fassbender’s penis ruined his chance at an Oscar. Really. It’s pretty well known that the Academy is a little stuffy, and they tend to be put off by racy scenes. So they may have overlooked Fassbender’s performance because of his full frontal nude scene.

Let’s face it – Michael Fassbender’s penis is a real problem. Here are a few more things that it has ruined.