Tuffy Luv Sez: Chill Out, Girlfriend

February 14, 2012 3:00 pm     Posted in Advice, Relationships  Tuffy Luv g+ page



By Tuffy Luv

Dear Tuffy Luv,

I love my boyfriend. We’ve been together for seven months and we hang out every day. I’m a sophomore and he’s graduating this year but plans to stay nearby (out college is near his hometown). Our relationship is great and I couldn’t ask for anything more.

The other day I was visiting his parents with him and we went out to eat. We ran into his mom’s coworker and his mom introduced me as “my son’s friend.” This is totally freaking me out. Then I thought about it and now I’m worried that his parents don’t realize we’re dating. What if he never even told them? Should I say something? To his parents? To him? It’s totally freaking me out!

Not Just A Friend

Dear Not Just A Friend,

Um, first of all, chill.

This is, like, an older person thing, dig? In Tuffy’s bestimate, your bf’s mom felt weird calling you his “girlfriend” because of the implied promiscuity. (I know. Not now. But for the older crowd.) Seriously. She probably just felt awkward, seeing as you were being included in a family outing (and probs staying at their place? maybe in his room?) without a ringyding.

Okay, but I don’t know this for sure. So let’s say, for a moment, that your paranoid fantasy of HE’S KEEPING OUR LOVE A SECRET is true. I mean, who does it hurt, really? If he doesn’t want his parents to know officially, BUT he still brings you around and takes you to family crap, don’t you think that implies they know you’re a couple? I mean, if not in words, then in actions?

Either way, I don’t think it’s worth getting into a tizzy over. And it’s certainly not worth sabotaging your currently-lovely relationship over some crazy crockpot worry that doesn’t affect you or your relationship with him even if (and HUUUUUUGE if) it were true. Don’t get needy. Don’t get crazy. Don’t get weird.

IF he was like, what the floop, stay out of my personal life and never meet my family or my friends or go anywhere I go–then YES, that would be awful and I’d say dump that ashhole. But it’s so not that way. So, geez. Chill and enjoy your excellent relationship.

Hearts & Skulls,

Tuffy Luv

Question?! Answer: Ask Tuffy Luv. Eating faces since 2008.

[Lead image via Warren Goldswain/Shutterstock]

5 Comments on "Tuffy Luv Sez: Chill Out, Girlfriend"

  1. Virginia says:
    Tue, 14th Feb 20125:10 pm 

    This is definitely a older generation thing (especially if the parent is speaking to someone who is also older and might be perceived as conservative). Don't worry! My mom has referred to my boyfriend as my "friend".

  2. Alison says:
    Tue, 14th Feb 20129:55 pm 

    This is how all of my family would introduce my boyfriends and my boyfriend's parents always introduce me that way even though he and I have been together for over 3 years. It's that generation since my grandparents and his parents are from the World War II generation and the Great Depression. Trust me if they didn't like you, they wouldn't introduce you at all.

  3. Ashley- GWU says:
    Wed, 15th Feb 201210:24 am 

    I know how much it sucks but everyone is right, it's definitely a characteristic of the older generation! Don't worry!

  4. Michelle - College of Idaho says:
    Wed, 15th Feb 201211:55 am 

    My grandma always called my older sister's first serious boyfriend her "little friend," which I thought was hilarious when I was 7. It's not big deal. I'd say the important thing is if he refers to you as his girlfriend — if he calls you his "friend," you have a problem.

  5. Suzie says:
    Wed, 15th Feb 20121:46 pm 

    My parents have always called all of my boyfriends "friends." They also did this to my sisters' boyfriends until they got engaged. It's a pretty common thing and you shouldn't worry about it.

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