Last week a few of y’all called me out for waving my cynicism flag. Fair enough — at times I can be bitter. We each of us have our sore spots. But this week our topic is a bit more upbeat, so I’ll try to keep the sardonic barbs to a minimum. The thing about writing a weekly column such as this is that it can very easily denigrate into a downright b*tch-fest if you let it. B*tching and moaning each week about the follies and foibles of men can be disheartening and, ultimately, unproductive. So, when contemplating this week’s topic, I decided to take a slightly different view of things. I could punch out a diatribe demanding more cunnilingus and begging for more compliments, but that’s not truly what I want more of from men. So let’s take a look: What do I really want?
-I want more of the good things. All those good things you do? Yeah, I want more.
-I want more nights when we stay up until 5am, talking and laughing.
-I want more of those drunken deep-and-meaningfuls that end in companionable silence and general contentment.
-I want more impromptu dinner dates at the cheap Asian place that turn into hours spent sipping 2-for-1 cocktails, making witty social observations that grow wittier as the night progresses.
-I want more rainy afternoons cuddled on the couch with that movie you said I’d like. I denied it at first, but you’re right, I did like it.
-I want more walks that were ill-advised (flip-flops weren’t made for hiking), but turned out to be the best fun I’d had in a long time.
-I want more of those nice things you say when I’m down, when I self-doubt, when I’m feeling low on confidence.
-I want more of your perspective on life’s problems. Your blunt, to-the-point summations of a crap situation tend to cut through all the layers of anxiety I’ve built up. The clarity is welcome, trust me — sometimes women can’t see the woods for all the trees.
-I want more of those reality checks you give me when I need to be taken down a few notches. Sometimes I need to be told when I’m being an asshole, and if I don’t appreciate it at the time, I certainly do later.
When it comes down to it, fellas, you’re doing a good job. I know us gals aren’t easy to put up with all the time, and we can be hard to please. Maybe we don’t show it or tell you enough, but we really, really appreciate all the good things you do. Men in our lives — be they boyfriends, friends, brothers, fathers or eccentric uncles — make us laugh, comfort us when we’re down, give the best hugs and show us that sweetness and romance are not yet dead, however cynical we might be. So thanks, guys, for all the good things you do. Give us more of the good and we’ll give you the best of us.
Wanna hear what he wishes you would do more? (God help us.) Head on over to COEDMagazine to find out!
[Lead image by aprilante/Shutterstock]