He Said/She Said: The Unspoken Rules of Sleeping Over

February 29, 2012 5:30 pm     Posted in Advice, He Said She Said, Relationships  Raquel g+ page


By Raquel

There’s something about spending the night with someone that makes you feel so content and appreciated. Not just the sex, mind you. There doesn’t even have to be sex. But sleeping over? Late night pillow talk and a warm body pressed against you? Amazing. Well, if it’s done right. In order for it to be done right, both parties should at least adhere to the following sleeping over guidelines…

DON’T hog the bed.

Especially if you are the guest! Taking up 90% of your own bed with splayed limbs and spread out hair is perfectly fine (actually, it’s divine). But in someone else’s bed it’s not ideal. Even if it’s your own bed, relinquish a little space to your guest; there’s not much point in having them there otherwise. Same with blankets — leaving someone with an inch of blanket and nary a pillow is selfish! If you really need to, buy more pillows.

DO give warning if you have to leave early.

Dashing out of bed early in the morning and leaving while your bedfellow is still asleep is just plain rude. If you must leave early, let them know the night before so that they don’t immediately label you an asshat for loving and leaving.

DON’T cuddle when it’s sleepy time.

Cuddles are amazing. Spooning is fantastic. But when I’m trying to sleep, you’re too damn hot! When it’s time to get some actual sleeping done, move away and let sleep be had.

DO clean up after yourself.

Yes, throw out the condoms, tissues, lube and other miscellany that are scattered around. Pick up your knickers and don’t leave you’re shoes lying right where I’m going to trip over them. If you’re the last person out of the bed, make it. Maybe I’m just a neat freak, but tidiness shows respect in my opinion.

DON’T fart in bed.

Unless you’re a very comfortable couple, farting in bed is unacceptable. I know, I know, it’s natural and all that jazz, but unless you guys are in proper relationship territory, it’s nice to maintain the illusion a little. Excuse yourself and go to the bathroom.

DO know when to shut up.

I like talking to you, yes. Murmuring quietly to each other in the dark is nice. But when my replies become nondescript “mmmmm”s, it’s time to be quiet because I’m probably mostly asleep.

DON’T snore.

Easier said than done if you’re a snorer, but at least make an effort. If you have a cold or sinus issues, apologise in advance and try to sleep on your side. Tell your bedfellow to wake you up if it’s bothering them – even if they don’t, they’ll appreciate you inviting them to do so.

In short, when it comes to sleeping over, it’s good to be a considerate, polite house guest. I’d not be best pleased if any bed buddy of mine exhibited any of these selfish behaviours, so keep good manners in mind. By the way, bonus points for making coffee and/or breakfast in the morning!

Wanna hear what He Said are the Dos and Don’ts of an adult sleepover?  Check it out at COEDMagazine.com!

[Lead image via Yeko Photo Studio/Shutterstock]

24 Comments on "He Said/She Said: The Unspoken Rules of Sleeping Over"

  1. Anonymous says:
    Wed, 29th Feb 20127:36 pm 

    I think for some of these you can only speak for yourself. I like to cuddle when I'm falling asleep. And I would never expect someone else to make my bed. And as far as farting goes, I hope you're not talking about when you're asleep. Most people naturally fart in their sleep and you shouldn't have to feel afraid to go to sleep for fear of farting (I once stayed up all night because I was gassy and I knew the second I fell asleep I was going to let out a smelly one.)

  2. criolle says:
    Wed, 29th Feb 201210:06 pm 

    Next time you're in the dollar/cheap store, pick up a few toothbrushes. Sleepovers or the friend who had too much to drink will sing praises to your name in the morning.
    Another benefit … That good-morning-and-see-ya cuddle is soooo much better when the other party has fresh breath.

  3. Ashley- GWU says:
    Thu, 1st Mar 201210:11 am 

    Don't hog the bed…definitely definitely true!

  4. anonymousy says:
    Thu, 1st Mar 201210:42 am 

    definitely do not hog the bed, pillow, sheets, once i slept at my guys house (not bf) and he was so drunk he passed out quickly and didn't realize he had the ONE pillow that he had on his bed and i was pushed against the hard wall the whole night with no pillow and barely any blanket, i almost considered walking home in the middle of the night and i lectured him in a jokingly but serious way when he woke up in the mooning.. he felt so bad immediately when he noticed that he cuddled me and made sure i was comfortable… hahah

  5. Amanda says:
    Thu, 1st Mar 201211:27 am 

    I think if you know the person well enough it's ok to leave without sayng bye. I do this all the time with my friend with benefits, I wake up early and he doesn't get off of work till midnight or later sometimes, so I like to be respectful and not interupt his sleep.

  6. biuro rachunkowe opole says:
    Fri, 8th Jun 20121:24 pm 

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  7. anon says:
    Tue, 12th Jun 20122:41 am 

    I can speak from personal experience.. That this is a load of bogus. lol

  8. anon says:
    Tue, 3rd Jul 20126:19 pm 

    farting when asleep is not good, let alone when awake !

  9. carlos says:
    Tue, 31st Jul 20123:39 pm 

    detesto que me hablen de un tema diferente cuando estoy haciendo el amor. se me quitan las ganas y no puedo seguir,

  10. Topcat says:
    Tue, 25th Sep 20125:59 pm 

    I like sleeping in the cuddle position.

  11. Hni says:
    Tue, 2nd Oct 20121:56 pm 

    Thanx

  12. Promise says:
    Tue, 9th Oct 20124:12 pm 

    I like cuddling, but farting in bed is out of it.

  13. Monkey says:
    Tue, 23rd Oct 20122:38 pm 

    My boyfriend told me at 6am this morning (we work together) that he needed to talk to me about the sleeping situation! I kind of guessed he meant cuddling but I wasn't sure.

    He confirmed tonight that he doesn't like cuddling while sleeping, I have never heard of this before but he told me most guys just don't have the balls to admit it. Fair enough but I thought I would google it anyway.

    He does fart and snore though when sleeping!

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    Sun, 30th Dec 201210:37 am 

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    Wed, 23rd Jan 201312:13 am 

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  17. cna salary says:
    Fri, 26th Apr 20136:04 am 

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  18. Pepper says:
    Mon, 29th Apr 20138:20 am 

    Asking someone not to fart while asleep is like asking someone not to have too loud of a heart beat. They have NO control over this. Same with snoring, people roll over while sleeping, it’s not something that you actively think about, and some people can’t fall asleep in certain positions.

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