One Month Challenge: I’m Giving Up Masturbation

March 3, 2012 5:00 pm     Posted in Advice, Sex  April University of Texas g+ page


By April University Of Texas

Sex. I love it. So when I vowed to stop having casual sex as a part of my New Years Resolution, I took out my pent up frustration on Dr. Lovegood (my vibrator). Naturally, my masturbation frequency has skyrocketed (5-7 times a week), which I feel is perfectly reasonable… for a pubescent male. Orgasms are important to me, but when masturbation is the first thing that comes to mind when asked, “What is your favorite thing to do?” I could probably use a break. I’m going to give up masturbation for 30 days… Just to see how it feels. I know some scientists say orgasms are good for health and yadda yadda, but monks abstain from the pleasures of the flesh and seem to be productive? I CAN DO THIS. I just have to be smart about it…

Potential hurdles during the month of March:

SXSW: SURE there may be a zillion extremely attractive band guys prancing around with tans and free booze, but whatever, I’ve been to SXSW before. I can handle it.

HUNGER GAMES RELEASE: This might not turn on many people… but I’ve read the trilogy three times, longing for a Peeta Mellark of my own, and SERIOUSLY Liam Hemsworth is playing Gale?!

MY BIRTHDAY: Yeah. I’ll just… dance a lot? I could very well be miserable, or I could pull a Josh Hartnett in 40 Days and 40 Nights and be crazy productive. Whatever happened to him, anyway? I’ll definitely need to steer clear of Josh Hartnett thoughts during the next month. And thoughts of Jason Stackhouse. And that really hot bartender at that place in the east village I always go to when he just so happens to be working because seriously, his arms are like cannons and his face would look really great between my legs. Uhhh… I’ll need some help.

I’ll tell you guys every time I think of masturbating, who the culprit is, etc, but I need your assistance. What the hell can I do in times of sexual frustration? A cold shower? A quick run? A punch to the vagina?

I’m sorry, Dr. Lovegood. This isn’t a punishment… We just need some time apart.

[April is a jack of all trades in New York City. A single gal originally from Texas, she likes salsa, whiskey and funny cat videos on youtube]

15 Comments on "One Month Challenge: I’m Giving Up Masturbation"

  1. ACM says:
    Sat, 3rd Mar 20127:39 pm 

    Daaaamnn never saw anyone so horny…. Calm yourself, woman!

  2. Arianna says:
    Sat, 3rd Mar 20127:46 pm 

    I will do this with you! I am not sure how well it will work out but I will try. lol

  3. Nuni says:
    Sat, 3rd Mar 201211:13 pm 

    good luck!

  4. Sam says:
    Sun, 4th Mar 20122:53 am 

    Yoga. The stretching feels aaaawesome!

  5. Cat says:
    Sun, 4th Mar 20123:30 am 

    Wow…..this makes me feel shitty. :( I masturbate like 1-3 times a day……now I feel like some kind of hussy. :'(

  6. Abby says:
    Sun, 4th Mar 20128:11 am 

    Yoga sure is great ;)

    But should one really deny some safe pleasurable fun?
    http://onestilettoatatime.blogspot.com

  7. Not A Hussy says:
    Sun, 4th Mar 201212:53 pm 

    I'm 1-3 times a day as well. I have the same libido as most of the guys I date so we have really great sex.

  8. jojo says:
    Sun, 4th Mar 20122:12 pm 

    im going to try this out…. mainly because I didn't realize anyone was as horny as I am and I probably need this break as well.

  9. m g says:
    Mon, 5th Mar 20125:08 am 

    If I ever run into you on campus, this article will for sure make one interesting convo, haha

    i'll just say what needs to be said.,.. as a guy, i relate

  10. Lisa says:
    Mon, 5th Mar 20128:23 am 

    Glad I'm not the only girl with the masturbatory habits of an unemployed 19 year old male stoner! I definitely enjoy myself, but do worry that I'm "wasting" my sexual energy and cheating myself and my bf out of a better sex experience. I think I may have to try this along with you.

  11. A P says:
    Mon, 5th Mar 20122:17 pm 

    i'm gonna do it with you, i think it will be good for me. LOL watch me fail epicly

  12. sweet pain says:
    Tue, 6th Mar 20122:50 pm 

    You are really hot

  13. kyu216 says:
    Wed, 7th Mar 201211:47 am 

    LOL this made me laugh. I'm looking forward to reading about your progress!

  14. Adrienne says:
    Fri, 9th Mar 20128:46 pm 

    I don't understand why you feel like you need to feel guilty or stop?

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    Fri, 16th Nov 20122:10 pm 

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