Expectation vs. Reality: First Date Edition

Girls love to whine and act like meeting men is this big, impossible feat. I would like to respectfully disagree. If you’re relatively attractive and have a halfway decent personality, meeting guys is like shooting fish in a barrel. Now granted some of the fish in your barrel have awkward leather sports coats and mysteriously gimp to the left when they walk, but hey, we’re all human.

I’ve found the hard part comes after you’ve found that one amazing guy. You know who I’m talking about — his jokes are actually funny; his hair does that great wavy thing that just calls out, “Run your fingers through me! Come on! It won’t be creepy at all, I promise;” his shoes are completely, mercifully normal. He’s your basic catch. And guess what? He just asked you out. On a first date. Welcome to Hell.

If you think first dates are fun, it’s okay — I was once like you. But you know all those expectations you’ve got for the night? Yeah…reality never quite measures up. Just take a look…

Alex loves rainbow sprinkles, retro bromances, and cultivating an iTunes library superior to yours. Most days, though, she just wishes she was Courtney Stodden. Got something to say or a good conspiracy theory you’re just dying to share with someone? Follow her on twitter @AlexandraRane or on Tumblr.

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  1. njorgensenblog says:

    Haha First impressions are everything. Great post!

  2. Katie Garrity - North Central College says:

    Man, so true. I always imagine these magical moments on a first date and it usually just ends up being an awkward mess of weirdness.

    1. Garnet – Columbia University says:

      Same here. My imagination is way, way too overactive. Reality rarely measures up.

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  9. adyvee says:

    I had a first date with this guy I had talked to online for about a month. His pictures looked so different from reality and his funny, long replies to messages online were well, much more funnier and longer than in person. He had nothing good about himself that he wanted to talk about!

    Another guy that I talked to online for a few months last spring and then half of summer and all of last fall turned out to be even better in person. He already seemed great online. Our actual meeting came by chance when we both happened to be studying at 4am in the same building for finals and we hung out a few days later when finals were over. We walked around the student housing area for my university before standing outside my apartment in the rain just talking. We talked from 2 am til almost 7:30am and it was greattt and he was so cute and smart! He texted me again right after he left and we texted some over winter break. But then the conversations got shorter and shorter in January and February and now I'm the last to text after 5 or so exchanges and he never initiates a conversation. We haven't hung out since then. I'm still disappointed, I really liked him and he had SO much potential!!! He was better in reality than online and I lost him…. :(

  10. Mini says:

    "And that 6'4 frame you thought he had is more like 5'4."

    Women place _way_ too much emphasis on a guy's height. What the heck does it matter
    if he's 5'4 if he treats you right and you genuinely like him? Some men are passed over only because they're short and that's not fair.

  11. damaskaren says:

    That's why I like a bit better (sometimes) when i go out with an acquaintance: you kinda already know what to expect. so, whatever happens, you're aware and the positive stuff will be a nice surprise.

    1. damaskaren says:

      Wow! I was finally able to post a comment!! I don't know why but it takes forever to upload my comments :(

  12. Leah says:

    I really like the idea of getting rid of that awkwardness on a first date by going on a completely non typical first date and letting yourself have fun: instead of going out make a meal together that does not include the use of a microwave or ready-made food, even if neither of you have any idea how to cook. If you live in a city go to some (nice non residential) part of the city neither of you have been before and just walk around. Or this one from tumblr "try and visit as many people as you can in one night, and turn as many things inside their apartment upside down as you can without them noticing". So that way even if the guy doesn't turn out all that great you still had a lot of fun, and if he doesn't want to do them then that's how you know he's not the most outgoing or he's just kind of boring.

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