Tweets And Statuses To Keep You Single

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Today is Twitter’s 6th birthday! That’s right, it has officially been six years since the very first tweet was tweeted. The site was originally called “Twttr,” and it only took about three years to reach one billion tweets.

So what was the first thing ever tweeted? The very first post came from Twitter’s co-founder Jack Dorsey, and it said “just setting up my twttr.” Totally casual, totally mundane, totally Twitter! In order to celebrate our favorite outlet for drunken thoughts, we’ve got some tips on how not to use Twitter.

We all have those “friends” from high school we feel obligated to keep on Facebook or follow on Twitter so we don’t offend them, but every time they update their status or post a new tweet we can’t help but roll our eyes. I have this friend. She always posts the most depressing, emo, kill-herself, tweets and status’ whining about how she doesn’t have a boyfriend. Uhm, honey – THAT’S WHY!! It’s a sad cycle of posting a sad tweet, turning off both friends and boys, getting upset about being alone and then posting a sad tweet – lather, rinse, repeat. Ridiculous. So here at CollegeCandy we’ve compiled a list of Facebook statuses and tweets to keep you single.

In conclusion, Twitter, and anything you post online for that matter, is online – for hundreds of people to read. Please stop treating it like an online diary you big, big crazy.

Are there any bad tweets we missed? Let us know in the comments, and while you’re at it, don’t forget to follow @CollegeCandy, @CC_Intern, and @NYC_CC on Twitter!

Molly is slowly dying inside because she stupidly decided to take on a triple major in English, Journalism and Broadcasting at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. She despises anyone that retweets Wiz Khalifa, talks about Twilight, or is a vapid idiot. She also might have some anger issues. Follow @mahannah410 on twitter.

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