Sexy Time: 5 Reasons Why I Love Being ‘Generous’

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My enthusiasm for blowjobs is a recent occurrence. A couple of years ago, I was fairly neutral on the act. When I was in high school, I was absolutely adamant that I would never, ever, in a million years, give one. I thought they were degrading, uncomfortably submissive, and something only women with no self-respect would do (I’m utterly ashamed of my younger self). Now, I see them in a different, vastly more positive light. Here’s why:

1. They’re easy.

There is an absurd amount of blowjob tutorials out there, making it seem like oral is akin to rocket science. When I first starting giving oral, I used to obsessively read how-tos written by guys and blowjob queens alike, and it was so overwhelming. It felt like a chore when I was down there, because my head was swirling with so much info. But really, it’s simple – find your rhythm, keep your mouth wet, be enthusiastic (but no need to pretend you’re in a porno), and when you get tired, start incorporating your hands.  Of course, there are a ton of other little “tricks” to spice it up, but really, in my experience, guys are not that pressed. They’re generally just stoked that you’re down there.

2. I get to be dominant.

So I generally prefer to relinquish control in the bedroom, but blowjobs are the exception. When I’m down there, I get to control the speed, the depth, and most excitingly, someone else is deriving pleasure because of what I’m doing. That is baller.

3. They’re less intrusive than intercourse.

I’ve hinted at my love of aggressive sex before, but one of the downfalls is that, well, it can be a little abrasive for my lady parts at times. So when I’m not feeling up to sex, but still want to engage in some intimate activity, BJs are an excellent alternative.

4. They’re selfless.

I never want to be seen as a selfish lover, but sometimes it’s easy to fall into that because, well, laying there and just enjoying the festivities is preferable to being engaged. But giving a good blowjob is a great way to combat these feelings, and I’m making someone else feel good. How charitable of me, right?

5. It’s easier to like it than to not.

When I first started giving head and I wasn’t that into it, I would get irrationally resentful of my partner. It’s silly, because I was not at all coerced into doing it, but blowjobs are nearly a default activity in nearly any sexual relationship wherein a penis is involved. And since I wasn’t morally opposed to it, nor did it really violate any absolutely set-in-stone boundaries at the time, head was going to be on the menu for the foreseeable future. So I learned to like it. Once I made a conscious decision to actively enjoy what I was doing, the rest fell into place.

[Lead image BestPhotoStudio/Shutterstock]

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