Sexy Time: 5 Reasons Why I Love Being ‘Generous’

March 22, 2012 9:30 am     Posted in Reality, Sex  Jasmine R. g+ page


By Jasmine R.

My enthusiasm for blowjobs is a recent occurrence. A couple of years ago, I was fairly neutral on the act. When I was in high school, I was absolutely adamant that I would never, ever, in a million years, give one. I thought they were degrading, uncomfortably submissive, and something only women with no self-respect would do (I’m utterly ashamed of my younger self). Now, I see them in a different, vastly more positive light. Here’s why:

1. They’re easy.

There is an absurd amount of blowjob tutorials out there, making it seem like oral is akin to rocket science. When I first starting giving oral, I used to obsessively read how-tos written by guys and blowjob queens alike, and it was so overwhelming. It felt like a chore when I was down there, because my head was swirling with so much info. But really, it’s simple – find your rhythm, keep your mouth wet, be enthusiastic (but no need to pretend you’re in a porno), and when you get tired, start incorporating your hands.  Of course, there are a ton of other little “tricks” to spice it up, but really, in my experience, guys are not that pressed. They’re generally just stoked that you’re down there.

2. I get to be dominant.

So I generally prefer to relinquish control in the bedroom, but blowjobs are the exception. When I’m down there, I get to control the speed, the depth, and most excitingly, someone else is deriving pleasure because of what I’m doing. That is baller.

3. They’re less intrusive than intercourse.

I’ve hinted at my love of aggressive sex before, but one of the downfalls is that, well, it can be a little abrasive for my lady parts at times. So when I’m not feeling up to sex, but still want to engage in some intimate activity, BJs are an excellent alternative.

4. They’re selfless.

I never want to be seen as a selfish lover, but sometimes it’s easy to fall into that because, well, laying there and just enjoying the festivities is preferable to being engaged. But giving a good blowjob is a great way to combat these feelings, and I’m making someone else feel good. How charitable of me, right?

5. It’s easier to like it than to not.

When I first started giving head and I wasn’t that into it, I would get irrationally resentful of my partner. It’s silly, because I was not at all coerced into doing it, but blowjobs are nearly a default activity in nearly any sexual relationship wherein a penis is involved. And since I wasn’t morally opposed to it, nor did it really violate any absolutely set-in-stone boundaries at the time, head was going to be on the menu for the foreseeable future. So I learned to like it. Once I made a conscious decision to actively enjoy what I was doing, the rest fell into place.

[Lead image BestPhotoStudio/Shutterstock]

24 Comments on "Sexy Time: 5 Reasons Why I Love Being ‘Generous’"

  1. Ema says:
    Thu, 22nd Mar 20122:34 pm 

    I love giving blowjobs! But I tend to get nosebleeds while going down. Has anyone else experienced this? Is there anything I can do? It gets a little awkward…

  2. kim says:
    Thu, 22nd Mar 20127:52 pm 

    …I don't think you're putting it in the right hole.

  3. nofear says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20129:13 am 

    lol!!! good one.

  4. danny says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20122:31 pm 

    that's anemia, you should swallow the content it may help
    the condition!!

  5. George Boxlicker says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20126:04 pm 

    If this is part of a whole sexual session, rather than just a quickie, the guy should be willing to do the same thing for you. If he isn't, you should dump him anyhow,

  6. Darryl says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20128:17 pm 

    "4. They’re selfless."
    You said you enjoy giving BJ's therefore it is not a selfless act. A women that dislikes giving BJ's yet does so for her man is selfless (unless she expects something in return which she most likely does).

  7. daddy says:
    Fri, 23rd Mar 20128:33 pm 

    the vagina is my 3rd favorite hole.

  8. mollified says:
    Sat, 24th Mar 20123:21 pm 

    Way to overthink it. She meant she doesn't get physical pleasure from it. Most people get some kind of pleasure from making others happy.

  9. Ima Luvinit says:
    Sat, 24th Mar 201210:18 pm 

    Not getting any huh? Too bad for you but I know for me the pleasure of the guy IS the thing that drives my own pleasure, so call that what you will but I totally enjoy the man's pleasure.

  10. Ima Luvinit says:
    Sat, 24th Mar 201210:20 pm 

    Maybe you're blowing too hard…. the term "blow job" isn't really literal.

  11. Becks says:
    Sun, 25th Mar 201211:52 am 

    69! :)

  12. Molly - UNL says:
    Sun, 25th Mar 20126:26 pm 

    Why would you do it if you disliked it? I feel like that's a stepping stone to feeling humiliated in the bedroom.

  13. Molly - UNL says:
    Sun, 25th Mar 20126:27 pm 

    I totally agree! My friends tease me on my oral prowess, but in reality I love the feeling of knowing my "hard work" paid off. It's rewarding. Plus, guys are typically stoked to have a girl that's excited to be down there.

  14. Oral says:
    Mon, 26th Mar 201212:21 am 

    BJ'S are the greatest thing a woman can do for a guy and if she wants it she can get a licking in return

  15. mark says:
    Mon, 26th Mar 20124:25 pm 

    My girl seems to like it. Wish i really knew for sure. I LOVE going downtown for her. She cannot handle it for long before the big O hits

  16. Guest says:
    Mon, 26th Mar 20126:14 pm 

    It actually sounds like a deeper (no pun intended) sinus issue. Of course I don't know your positioning while congressed, but it could be creating the pressure that causes the bleeding. A good ear, nose, throat specialist may be able to help.

  17. Celeb says:
    Mon, 26th Mar 20128:15 pm 

    I never thought will give enyone a bj but i did @ realy enjoy it was wow

  18. Betty says:
    Mon, 26th Mar 20129:38 pm 

    I was the same way. While in highschool I was convinced I would never give one but now I really enjoy it. I love love seeing my guy pleasured and I actually enjoy the texture of his manhood.

  19. edward says:
    Thu, 29th Mar 20123:01 pm 

    77 cause you get ate more

  20. george says:
    Tue, 3rd Apr 201211:21 am 

    Yeah, but what about the horrible taste of the paste?? Does any girl seriously even like it?

  21. Diane says:
    Thu, 12th Apr 20128:52 pm 

    In my case, I never had anything against giving blowjobs, not even in high school, maybe because, like you say, they're easy to give and not very intrusive. But I totally agree with your reasons for giving head. I'd probably add that giving blowjobs can actually be a turn on.

  22. Old Guy says:
    Sun, 19th Aug 20128:11 pm 

    Well naever gave one but have recived my fair share. Never had a bad one but some are much better than others. The big difference IMO is it is far more pleasuerable for me if the gal giving shows enthusiasum & desire..
    Had a GF in the 70's that loved giving head. When she drank a bit there was no stopping her even in public places. I miss you Helen!

Tell us what you're thinking...