12 Places To Get It On Before You Graduate

April 8, 2012 5:00 pm     Posted in College, HaHa, Relationships, Rotating Marquee, Sex  The Dude g+ page


By The Dude

[Got a Dude itch you just can’t scratch? Sick of trying to come up with a not-totally-crazy-girl way to bring it up to your guy friends and get their take on things? Totally over over-analyzing the cryptic messages he leave on your Facebook Wall? We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude [at] collegecandy [dot] com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time. So bring. it. on.]

College. The 4, for some of us 5, greatest of our glory years. You’re not a girl, yet not quite a debt-ridden woman (yes, I just made a Britney Spears reference, didn’t you know…she’s back! So it’s okay.) You’ll take a lot of memories with you from the journey from duckling Freshman to swan Senior, but there will also be some regrets. Some of those regrets are going to haunt you for the rest of your life, or until you get a good paying job, which in this economy might mean the rest of your life. And of those regrets, potentially chief among them are not having sex in places you wish you would have. Once you graduate, these passion possibilities are past their expiration date. They’re gone…gone…gone. So here’s your Uncle Dude trying to make sure you have the most fulfilling experience you can. Here are 11 places you should have sex before you graduate:

FULLSCREEN

    • And there you have it folks, not 10, not 11, but 12 places to have sex before you graduate. Put this list on your dorm room door and start checking them off. Trust me, there are parts of the college experience that aren’t essential, I can make an argument that any of these absolutely are. The real questions: which of these have you already done, and did I miss any goodies?

    With honors,

    The Dude

    [Lead image via Diego Cervo / Shutterstock]

    13 Comments on "12 Places To Get It On Before You Graduate"

    1. kay says:
      Sun, 8th Apr 20128:30 pm 

      laundry room, class room, library- check ;) not sure how one (ahem- two) would manage that in the dining hall, ours is completely open, and there's staff everywhere even when the are no students.

    2. Kate says:
      Mon, 9th Apr 20126:38 pm 

      I had a friend who did it in the library stairs during finals week! How she managed that, I have no idea.

    3. Marisa says:
      Mon, 9th Apr 20129:52 pm 

      Always wondered what were the consequences of getting caught hooking up in the library… you know, for science…

    4. The Dude says:
      Tue, 10th Apr 201210:54 am 

      Of course…for science…the consequences would probably be you becoming more AWESOME!

    5. The Dude says:
      Tue, 10th Apr 201210:56 am 

      With knee pads, I hope. It's kind of amazing that no one came down or went up the stairs while they were mid-coitus but I guess that's the beauty of the hell that is finals week: everyone's tunnel visioned and stationary for cramming. Were there any on this list you can check off?

    6. The Dude says:
      Tue, 10th Apr 201210:58 am 

      First off, batting 300 out of 1000 is pretty damn impressive. Dining hall would be tricky with staff around. We actually had a second floor that was more of a lounge, had some couches, depending on the outfits, the shift rotation of the staff, and how long it would take, that might make it possible. In the main dining hall though, on a table, that would take Ethan Hunt-like skill.

    7. meandtheworld90 says:
      Mon, 16th Apr 20124:24 am 

      That's the U of I quad! haha. This is an awesome list though.

    8. Mae says:
      Mon, 16th Apr 20124:39 am 

      I blame this article for the used condom I had to encounter at my school bus stop.

    9. Holli says:
      Wed, 16th May 20123:12 pm 

      the explains why my university laundry room actually has a condom machine in it….

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