Why NOT To Get Back With Your Ex

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Man, where do you even start with this? I mean, he’s that guy who was there with you for a really crucial time in your life, you know? You were closer than Northstar and Kyle. You truly cared and shared something meaningful. Plus you weren’t lonely. You had someone. He had someone…Time’s passed a bit. Maybe the bad stuff won’t be like it was, right? I mean, there had to have been good times. Great times, even. Why’d you even break up in the first place? Oh, wait….THAT’S WHY!!!!

Getting back with an ex could be renamed The Most Dangerous Game. There are so many pitfalls it’s tough to track them all. A lot of times it’s done out of loneliness, fear, craving safety and security in something familiar and, of course, nostalgia.

Jeeezy Chreezy, hindsight can be seen through some stained glass f*cking glasses. And it’ll just f*ck your s*it up! I mean, come on! You’re not together for a reason. There was a tangible reason, a REAL reason things weren’t working. He’s for the Yankees, you’re for the Red Sox. He loves Tennant, you love Smith. He’s got a dick, you’ve got a vagina-something elemental was flawed from the beginning and working against you is my point. Or something grew and festered and crumbled the relationship. Or he cheated. Or you cheated. Or SOMETHING HAPPENED! Because you don’t just randomly decide it’s over, there’s a trigger, and behind the trigger is the firing pin.

Here’s why you DON’T get back with your ex:

You think it’s a better alternative to being alone
You convince yourself “it wasn’t that bad”
You’re horny
He’s said, “I’ve changed”
You just don’t feel like wading through the dating pool
He has free Wi-Fi (I know of a case this is applicable to)
His family loves you
He threatens to do himself bodily harm if you don’t come back
You watched all of “Friends” and think of him as Ross and you’re Rachel

Just remember, break-ups get exponentially worse the more times they happen between the same two people. If things go wrong a second time, a third time, a FOURTH time, it just gets uglier and uglier (usually… there are, of course, exceptions to this rule). Which means that if you are planning to get back with your ex, you better really put your motives under the microscope.

Don’t go breaking your heart, again,

The Dude

[lead image via Lasse Kristensen/ Shutterstock]

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