Tuffy Luv Sez: He’s SO Not Worth It
Ask Tuffy Luv!!! tuffyluvcc [at] gmail [dot] com
Dear Tuffy Luv,
I have been friends with a guy for a while now, and we’ve always gotten along fine and hang out often with a bunch of other friends. A few months back, he started dating this girl. Few of our friends really like her, me included, but we’re fine with her as long as she makes him happy. The first few weeks were okay, but recently she has started to accuse me of trying to elbow her out; she’s even told him I’ve been calling her all sorts of nasty things behind his back. It wouldn’t bother me if it were true or if he didn’t believe her, but as things are now, he’s falsely accusing me of being a bitch to his gf. How do I handle false accusations like this?
Dear Sad Suspect,
Sorry, Aunt Tuffy knows it’s not what you wanna hear, but this is a friend, yes? This is a guy you’ve hung out with and been friends with “for a while now.” He’s known this girl for a few months. His friends (you guys) don’t like her. And he’s gonna trust her word over yours?!
I mean, it’s one thing if he was like, “Hey, Sad Suspect, what the floop? This is what I heard, what’s your side?” But nooooooooo. Dude had to be all HEY YOU DID THIS AND I DUNLIKE IT. So, um, wtfloop?
I think you can safely be done with this guy. Someone who automatically takes someone else’s word over yours without even asking for your side of the story is not your friend. It’s just someone you hang out with, and it’s someone you can really do without.
Set the story straight with your real friends. Don’t spread rumors. Don’t get angry. Just tell them you never said it, and that you’re not sure why she said you. Refuse to talk badly about her OR him. Consider sending this dude an email saying, “Hey, no hard feelings, but I never said any of that. It’s okay that you chose to believe her, but I wanted to tell you the truth, which is that I’m not who she is making me out to be. Best wishes, Sad Suspect.”
And then be done with him.
Hearts & Skulls,
[lead image via Piotr Marcinski / Shutterstock]