It’s Always Okay to Say No [Sexy Time]
By Jasmine R.
Consent is a fundamental component of safe and satisfying sex. You should never shy away from expressing clear and firm boundaries to your partner. There’s a certain level of ambiguity that is accepted in sexual situations, but there is no such thing as being too straight-f is aorward about your intentions, your desires, and your expectations. Engaging in enthusiastic consent is always a good thing, but saying no is just as important. Unfortunately, there is a history of there being circumstances in which society has indicated that people, women in particular, relinquish their right to withdraw consent. (Spoiler alert: I disagree completely with this).
The idea that “no is a negotiation” has absolutely no place when it comes to sex (unless you’re doing some agreed upon role-playing). Never forget that you have agency, and anyone who ever tries to deny you agency is highly suspect. The best sex is consensual and safe sex.
Author’s note: This post has been updated to further clarify my perspective. There is absolutely no time when someone cannot say no.
Jasmine is a graduate of Northern Arizona University who moved across the country to the Washington DC area for the politics and stayed for the cupcakes. She likes working on her fitness, collecting nail polish, devouring current events, being the only person who still watches Gossip Girl, and relentlessly tweeting @itsajasmine.
[Lead image via Camilo Torres/Shutterstock]