In Defense of Long Distance Relationships
Listen up world, I am tired of all the long-distance relationship bashing. It’s everywhere, from the random drunk guys who feel the need to tell me ‘that’ll never work out’ to movies like Like Crazy that show LDRs as doomed to fail. I totally get it, before I was in one I thought they were stupid too. And honestly, they can be. I still believe that if you’re not completely committed to the guy, if he isn’t the one you picture yourself growing old with, it’s a complete waste of time. After all, if all you want is fun, it’s a lot easier to have that with someone close by. Long-distance relationships only work out when you find someone truly great, which is why LDRs have the potential to be amazing.
The second someone commits to being with you even when they’re miles away, your connection instantly becomes more serious. You’re committing to something that’s more than just sex, which kind of defines your relationship from the get-go. If you’re swapping going to a movie together with hours of skype time, you need to actually enjoy talking to each other. The kind of people who can actually pull off a long distance relationship are a special breed (not to toot my own horn) – they’re willing to put in a lot of effort, be open to something tougher than the usual and are able to completely put their trust not only in the other person, but in the strength of their relationship. If two people of that specific type are able to find each other, love each other, but just happen to live in different areas, or in my case, countries, they shouldn’t let each other go.
And finding each other is tough. Not only is location battling against the brave long-distance relationship discoverers, but timing is everything. That’s why it’s so annoying when people dismiss LDRs as pointless or stupid. If everything has come together for these two people to meet, and they’re strong enough to even consider a relationship that they know is going to be tough, how can anyone disrespect it?
I think LDRs have a pretty bad rep, which is probably why so many people are scared to start one up. But hey, there are some cool things about them! You get more quality then quantity – rather than being able to hang out all day, you might just get a one hour skype session, but that just means you focus completely on each other for that time, something which a lot of couples forget to do. You’ll never take quality time with your significant other for granted; after not seeing each other for months, every moment is incredible. In a long-distance relationship, you have to work at everything – they take effort, which just means your relationship becomes deeper so much more quickly. Finding substitutes for typical couple activities can actually be kind of awesome. Plus, you get so much time apart, which for independent, hard-working people is a definite bonus. You can do anything you want, have fun girls’ nights out, focus extra hard on school. You get the best of both worlds – freedom and independence with the complete comfort that comes with loving and being loved.
I’m not going to lie, it is tough sometimes. You have to work hard on trust, and making sure it stays fresh, the same as any relationship. It sucks being away from the person you love, but if you’re in it for the long haul it’s all worth it. So stop the LDR bashing everyone! Sometimes they actually work out, and you’ll feel bad being the one who doubted the LDR when you’re at the couple’s wedding.
What do you think of Long Distance Relationships? Have you ever had one? Leave a comment below and get involved in the LDR debate!
[Lead Image via trintme]